Please?

[Scott Taylor]

Guys... I know I sound like a friggin noob, I'd like to apologise now if I do something wrong later...

t'is just that... I wanted to make a Banjo-Conker crossover RPG myself... is it ok??

and if it is... who would be in?

thanks for understanding...

[Kablamooie]

I'm in. :cool:

[Zippop]

I've never played Conker, but I'm in anyway.

PS- anybody notice that Conker is pronounced the same as conquer? I think that Rare's up to something! j/k

[MewChan]

^ It must be the answer to sns! j/k
[Well, i'm in!]

[RareBK]

umm I might be in..

[Scott Taylor]

yay, lets just wait a few other guys (maybe 2 or 3) to confirm so it will get more exciting... be prepared, I've got some weird ideas for this one....

[mrfleshcadge]

I'm in as well!

[Banjzooie]

Please tell me its not another SnS RPG.

[Scott Taylor]

its not another SnS RPG... its far beyond...

Starts!

*Six o' Clock on a christmas morning... Banjo and kazooie still sound asleep... the clock timer awakens them with some phillipine death metal*

GRRRR GRRR GRRR GRRRR YAAARGH RGRGRGRG GRGRGGRGR YAAAAAAAAAAAAA

*Banjo quickly slaps the timer and gets up*

Sheesh, I should remember changing the station next time... but what the-?

*Banjo listens to some weird noise similar to a drunken dolphin playing with a chainsaw. He rushes to the window, only to see a drunken dolphin playing with a chainsaw and cutting his recently grown pines*

YER HOGWALLOP! Get that cutting object away from my Gymnosperma Trees! I'll get kazooie and we'll be doin' some arse whoopin you'll never forget!

*Meanwhile, at the nearest Clock and Plucker, Conker the Squirrel and Greg the Grim Reaper are drinking some gin and discussing about how bear hunting is an interesting sport*

GR- Well, you see, hunting bears is really neat because you get to kill the fishes that will serve as bait...

CS-Well, besides my %&*@ing initials spell this boring shooting game (I'd rather play my own game... HAH), I think that just killing anything is really neat... except for cute lil' chicks...

GR-You know, there is this pedant bear who insists on living at a recluse house in domains uncertain... How about having some bear soup for dinner?

CS- I'm in! But this bear, is it irracional or does it inexplicably think, like meself?

GR-He is unfortunately a thinker... But don't worry, I think even so we'll be able to fool him... Meanwhile, have a quarter and go fetch me some peanuts...

CS-Why don't you get those peanuts and-

GOD-IF YOU EVER SWEAR AGAIN, I SHALL MAKE YOU BEAR ETERNITY WITH THE GOLGOTHA, THE MONSTER MADE OF EXCREMENT (copyright Kevin Smith)

CS-... we'll, I've never been a catholic really... why bother? YOU F*&%$!

*But, on the supernova named Zyklotskison, an even more sinister plan is hatching*

I shall abolish all living creatures from the planet earth and use them as trousers, mwahahahaha

---------------------------------------

yay, me first RP, howdja like it?

EDIT:Sorry, when I said RPG I was still meaning RP, I didn't know there would be 2 interpretations... I'm sorry if someone is disapointed...

[Scott Taylor]

aww come on... no one wants to continue? its gonna be fun!

[RareBK]

Umm if no one posts it doesnt mean they dnat want to post.

[Zippop]

I'm out. I don't want to be in this anymore....*retches*

[Scott Taylor]

ingrateful mother buzzers... see you in hell

EDIT:traducing my intention "why was it bad? point the bad stuff, otherwise, continue it!"

[Zippop]

friendly, aren't we? I think Conker rubbed off on you! You sure are rude...

[MewChan]

Hell dosnt exist. Hell is just an ilusion so see you in an ilusion. I was likeing this all up to the part where I had to post this. You could get suspended or banned for saying such stuff to members. You should delete your post before a mod does.

[Klungo]

I don't even think it's possible for non-mods to delete posts. If you can than how? I only think that what he said was a pun since Zippop's avatar is a bee. Anyhow, can I join? I'll be the villans if you let me join.

[Zippop]

Hm... I didn't think of that... I'll come back in if you let me be teh bad d00d! j/k

[Scott Taylor]

hey people...

I was merely using of the wonder of ambiguity!

was I really swearing? or was I conkerly saying "I'm kinda disappointed because no one wanted to post anything, like ****ing turning their backs and not pointing my mistakes"

all I wanted was causing a polemic... and I got one! hehehe

well, anyone can join it! just post something to continue the RPG!

sorry if anyone thought "what a piece of **** this guy is" but I felt really disappointed by the reaction of everyone who joined!

well, sey whoever you wanna be, and let the show go on!

[Klungo]

I asume that all of us can control Conker and Banjo. So I'll be the partners in crime Captain Blackeye and the Evil Acorn.

Conker uses Greg's time machine to go to Spiral Mountain after Banjo Tooie.

Conker: I made it.
(Banjo sees Conker and runs to say hi. Suddenly Conker chases Banjo into Grunty's Lair.)

Somewhere in hell.

Evil Acorn: After Conker's beta brother beat me I was sent here for 29,000 years. However, this isn't really punishment. This place is just a barrier between good and evil. Soon i'll magicly get a new look and identity and then I'll rule the new world of Conker. Wahahahaha!

Blackeye: I passed away last week while drinking. They put me here because I might get drunk and kill an angel's soul. I am only here for 1 week and I believe that your time is done here as well.

Evil Acorn: Exellent! Lets leave and kill everyone that's good in both Conker's and Banjo's Worlds. But we'll start with Banjo's cause it's easy. Wahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (They jump on the trampoline to Banjo's world and combine into a two-headed beast called Aceye. The Evil Acorn is the first head and Blackeye the second)

[MewChan]

Meanwhile, two squirrels Beri and ??? are conversing over a cup of coffee...
Beri.So I said to him you wana know what I said to him *Blah blah ec ec.*
???.[In mind] Oh my freaking gawd! Someone shoot me! *Nods head*
Beri.*Looks at nearby clock* Oh... I gota go, i'm in the next Conker sequil in 15 minutes, bye! *Runs off*
???.Thank gawd! Wait, a Conker game sequil, and Beri's in it? ALIVE?!? Okay... Somethings not right in the world of Rare and i'm gona find out! *Puts on helmit, jumps on skatebord and follows the direction Beri is going in*
To Be Continued. Btw. You'll find out who ??? is next time I post.

[Scott Taylor]

Chasing banjo into the depths of grunty's lair, they end up in mumbo's mountain

banjo-Hi conker! Why do you have an AK-47 in your hands

conker- what gun? *hides it* must be your illusion... I was... I was... wanting your autograph!

banjo- really... well, I was just going to solve things with this dolphin and- BUT WHAT THE HELL IS THIS???

*both look up and see a huge banner saying "Fancy Socks
land, buy your chesse HERE*

conker uses the moment and points his gun at banjo

C-how do you want to die, quickly or slowly? Oh, you aren't here anymore... How $#@*& usual, innit?

Meanwhile, in space, the evil man shows his face

Mr. Pants- For I, MR. PANTS, must have more than just pants! Why the hell can't I be Mr. Trousers? May those pathetic earthlings serve as cloth-

weird henchman named Captain Darling- but how will you use them as clothes if they aren't prime matter for the subject?

Mr. Pants-if there is a willow, there is a while! or was it something else? no matter darling, for I shall use them in a manner you wouldn't imagine! lets aboard the Kelwyn Claym and consume my terridable plot...

[MewChan]

??? Then arives at the scene!
???.Did Beri go this way? She said something about a sequil and-
Conker.*Drops gun* M- Mooshake? I thought I killed you in that bank!
Mooshake. Kya! Nope, I doged the bullet! *Picks up gun Conker dropped* Allright Conker... Whats this about a CBFD sequil? How did Beri come back to life? Tell me...Or die.
Banjo.Allright, whats going on?
Mooshake.Ah cool! It's Banjo! ...Where's Kazooie?
Conker.Okay thats it! *Punches Mooshake and picks up gun, resuming to kill Banjo* Now where were we?
Will Mooshake wake up in time to stop Conker? Will Banjo get away? And whats with the CBFD sequil? Find out next time on Rare Ware wars! XD

[Klungo]

(Conker aims for banjo, but Mooshake struggles to get up and manages to tug Conker by the leg. Conker falls over and the drops the gun into the lake. Conker runs for it, but he realises that he can't swim in Banjo Land water. Conker runs and kicks mooshake, killing him.)

Conker: I give up. Now all I have is a harmless frying pan. Do you want to go back to the bar with me?

Banjo: Sure Guh-Hu!

(They start to walk, but a shadow emerges from the darkness. It's Aceye. He walks slowly up to our two heros and pulls out his two swords.

A1: Hello new Conker.
Conker: Aren't you the acorn dude who my beta brother defeated many moons ago?
Banjo: You have a brother?
Conker: Well over 1,000 years ago when my world was young my past life beat this dude. Then my world grew up and started becoming M rated. The reason i call him my brother is because every few thousand years you have a descendent that is just like you, only modern. I am his brother descendent.
Banjo: What about the second head? It looks like Captain Blackeye.
A2: I am Blackeye.
ABoth: Our hell time was up so we came to the living world to destroy both of your worlds.
A1: We combined to become...
A2: Aceye!!!

(Aceye blows up MM using his beam sword. Then a light appears and they all get teleported somewhere else. Aceye on the other hand escapes the teleporation and instead goes to Conker's throne room.)

Where did they go? What was the light? The next person to post will descide.

[MewChan]

Mooshake.Hey! I cant die! *Mooshake respawns and finds that her, Banjo, and Conker are in the bar*
Mooshake.Hey guys! As I was saying before you killed me you dumbass....WHats this about a sequil?
Conker.Theres no sequil okay? Just shut up! What the hell just happened?
Banjo.I don't know but I wana beer.
Mooshake.I think some creepy time paradox just happened because look.
[Mooshake points to a corner and Beta Conker, banjo, and Mooshake are there.]
Banjo.*Drinking beer* Woah! *Spits out beer* B- Banjo?
Beta Banjo.No, i'm just Bear right now, have you seen Pichilo?
Conker. *Looks at beta self* Brother...
Beta Conker. Darn acorn, ruined my birthday party. *Tear*
Mooshake.*Looks at beta self* I'm not even in a video game.
Beta Mooshake. I'm not soposed to be here.
[Take it away someone! To be continued.]

[Klungo]

(Conker looks at the seat next to there beta friends. He sees a Tediz)
Conker: Oh my Giddy Aunt! Tediz, I hate these guys. Didn't I defeat them?
Beta Conker: Yes you did, but they came back along with us. You see while I was in heaven God saw Aceye attack you...
Beta Banjo: and he decided to beam us down to help you beat him. But the only way to do so was to teleport both the modern and beta versions here. But Mooshake's dead body got in the way...
Beta Mooshake: So both me and modern me came here. But god also had to send someone from hell here. So he picked the Tediz that you saw.





What will the Tediz do? Will our heros survive? Find out on the next post of the Banjo meets Conker RP.







MewChan, which character from Conker is mooshake?

[MewChan]

OT. Mooshake is me...
Beta Mooshake: Oops... Well we gotta kill theese $**^ers somehow. *Hits one with her skatebord* [Beta Mooshake is olny 3.]
Mooshake:See, I was like that as a child, look at me now. *Chucks helmit at one*
Bear (Beta Banjo):If we all work together, we can beat 'em! *claw swipes a Tedi*
Banjo:*Does the same and whipes out 3* Allright! Wish Kazooie were here to see this!
[Kazooie is still asleep]
Beta Conker:*Shoots acorns out of a slingshot and hits one*
Conker:Friggin easy. *Pulls out pistol and whipes out the rest of the tediz*
Mooshake:Now what?
Beta Mooshake:We all have to get Blackeye and the Evil Acorn and kick his ass, thats what!
Beta Conker:I want my presents and Beta Beri back...
Bear:What if the Giant finds us??? WHERES PICILO?!?
Banjo:What the? Giant?
Conker:Who cares, lets find him and mug him! I need more beer money anyway.
[And so our heros set off into the unknown to defeat Acorn and Blackeye, but what of the Giant? Find out next time!]

[Scott Taylor]

Las Vegas, the Caesar hotel, bar, 18 hundred hours

A1-I want... acorn juice
A2-And some water for me!
bartender-ugh, I shouldn't have exagerated on my headbonking! A two headed hellish guy? *passes out*
Aceye- No one understands us! Boohooo

*betas and normal guys walk in*

conker- ALLRIGHT! CASH! *goes to the nearest slot machine*

Banjo-I-I-I g-g-gues we shuld uh, wotstheword, procrasstrinatriretsadte taaah felllowasss *passes out as well*

Bear- Ok then, piccolo is not here, and my double has gone beyond bagdad with his irresponsable drinking, gotta keep rational, KEEP RATIONAL! Well beta conker and 2 mooshakes, lets finish em! *kicks aceye*

beta conker- I hope when we cut its body open chocolate acorns will come out of it! *tail whip (copyright pichu)*

mooshakes- at ease, silver! *through their weapons*

aceye-Nya ha ha, your attacks are useless! try THIS! *takes out megaton hammer*

all good guys- oh no! the writer is on acid again! What will we do???

a1- die!

suddenly, a underpants-shaped UFO arrives from the sky...

Mr. Pants (using megaphone)- all shall be trousers, and trousers everything shall be! lets play a round of tetris!

*colored blocks fall from the sky*

conker (seemingly richer)- oh yeah? try this other old game flashback, SPACE INVADERS!

*begins shooting at the blocks moving sideways. all of them perish, except one falling over... but in comes sober banjo with a super smash brothers baseball bat, and beats it away*

banjo- PONG!

will the block the ship? will aceye kill everyone? will cookies stop fooling around? find out in the next post by someone

[MewChan]

[WARNING! Weirdness due to overnight posting!]
Mooshake. What the hell? *Falls asleep*
Beta Mooshake.AGH! You retard, wake up!
Beta Conker. *Shoots down pants spaceship*
Conker.Allright! I won a ticket to 6 flags!
Banjo.Zzzz.....
Everyone else just stares in horror for no reason.
[Someone make me stop writing this, it's 11:00 at night, I think I might be drunk/halve asleep, *Tranquilizes self*]

[Scott Taylor]

Mr. Pants- noooo, all my splendor is gone! now my plan was eliminated!

Aceye-Easy weird guy, lets make an allegiance and defeat these animals!

*cuts banjo in 2*

conker- WHAT THE-

Mr. Pants- Alas, a chance of victory! Eat pants!

*shoots underpants at every one, including his recent allie*

Mooshake- Gaah, now i've got DIRTY CLOTHES chucked at me! This is unnaceptable! REVEEEEEEEEEEEEENGE

*all of the good guys advance with their weapons. aceye runs away, and mr. pants becomes a toothbrush*

beta conker- hey, I'm floating! HA HA *becomes a sandwich*

bear and mooshakes- ach no! *all fund into a mild mannered paint bucket*

paint bucket- there is no one repeat me! and all the sanity has gone! oh well *gets a 7 string guitar, hires a support band, and goes on world tour*

San Francisco, Fillmore theater

paint brush- WE LOVE U SAN FRANCISCO, GOOD NIGHT

[MewChan]

Mooshake.WHAT THE HELL? *Respwans AGAIN* 'kay now. I think we have reached normality.
Beta Mooshake.What the %$(* just happened?
Bear.I don't know...
Conker.*Passes out from lack of chocolate*
Beta Conker.Beta Beri? Where are you?
Banjo.To be continued when the writers get their sanity back.