Boggy's RPG III: Mildred's Revenge

[Upsilon]

Three years have passed since Mildred Ice Cube was defeated by Boggy Bear and his adventuring chums. After being trounced by the courageous heroes, she died and her fragments were scattered across the world, where they remain to this day…

Now, peace has been fully restored to the world. Grublins innocently gambol at the foot of Mumbo's Mountain, Zubbas work laboriously in their Cloud Cuckooland nest and Mad Monster Mansion occasionally manages to look friendly. Even the famous bear and bird have been untroubled by witchy goings-on for a while.

But in an icy meeting-room deep in the chilly caverns of Freezeezy Peak, that tranquillity is being efficiently placed under threat…

Two conspirators sit at the table. They are both icicles from Hailfire Peaks, and were both Mildred's underlings. This is only the second time they have met since her downfall.

Blain: What happened to Hale?

Hiver: He was not a true supporter of the cause. He has been dealt with accordingly. We shall not be hearing from Hale again. Now, to business. As you know, our queen was killed three years ago, but she remains in the form of scattered shards. Sixty, to be precise. And shards can be re-pieced.

Blain: If we rebuild her, she'll just be a corpse, Hiver.

Hiver: That's Mr Hiver to you, Blain! And once our goal is achieved, she will be much more. Tell me, have you ever heard of such a machine as the B.O.B.?

Blain: Of course.

Hiver: Well, the B.O.B. is but a toy compared to the weapon that we have at our disposal. Observe.

Hiver waddles across the room to a large object covered by a sheet, which he tugs away to reveal a huge machine.

Blain: What's that, Mr Hiver?

Hiver: So glad you asked, Blain. This is my own personal invention, over which I have been slaving ever since our queen was killed. I call it D.A.V.E. That's Doomsday Angel Vitalising Engine.

Blain: I think I see, Mr Hiver. We intend to recapture all the fragments of our queen and reassemble them into her old body. Then we will use this here magnificent engine to summon up an apocalyptic spirit and install it in her body. The doomsday angel will then wreak the end of the world as we know it using her body as a channel, thus avenging her death.

Hiver: You're a smart lad, Blain. And you don't have to call me Mr Hiver any more. Just call me sir.

Meanwhile, on a quite similar mountain many miles away, a polar bear is sitting in front of the TV, enjoying his fabulous new Sky+ box. Not much has happened since he last went adventuring. He's lost a bit of weight as per Mrs. Boggy's insistence, but apart from that he's mainly been sitting back and wasting his life in front of the TV. He couldn't ask for a more pleasant existence.

Suddenly, there is a knock at the door. Boggy pauses the TV and pads over to the door. Standing there is an exhausted-looking icicle.

Boggy: What are you doing here?

Icicle: I don't have much time to explain. Listen carefully, Boggy Bear. My name is Hale. I know of a plot to revive Mildred Ice Cube. Conspirators are planning to recover all the shards of Mildred's body and re-piece them. I don't know all the details, but they plan to cause death and destruction throughout the world. You must stop them. There are sixty shards to collect; they can achieve what they want to do with three-quarters of that amount.

Boggy: So I've got to collect and destroy sixteen of these shards to stop this from happening, right?

Hale: That's right. But it's not as easy as it sounds –

Boggy: Let me guess. This is one of these "scattered far and wide across many worlds" things, isn't it?

Hale: Yes. Your first port of call is –

Hale looks around nervously, and sees something in the distance.

Hale: They've seen me! Quickly, inside!

He pushes Boggy inside the igloo. Boggy hears shouts outside, the clinks of ice on ice and the sound of a hairdryer being activated, followed by screams of pain. He looks out of his letterbox to see two Chinkers in shades gliding surreptitiously away from a puddle of water on the ground.

Boggy: This looks big. I'm going to have to round up some kind of team, methinks.

The next day, a sign has appeared on Boggy's front door: "Heroes Wanted To Save The World. Apply Within."

Boggy: Something tells me it isn’t going to be so easy this time...

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[Those of you who were in my old RPG will know the drill. This is basically more of the same. Despite the long set-up, this is a light-hearted RPG and drifting off-topic somewhat is permitted. Anyone can join. The rules, such as they are: don't contradict what someone's already said; no complete nonsequiturs. That said, the main aim is to have fun and be creative. Enjoy!]

[mrfleshcadge]

Ive been waiting for a new RPG for ages. Count me in.

[lamentofgrunty]

me i'll be in.

[Minjo]

Count me!

Name: Skell
Genre: Male
Description: Good-hearted frozen skelleton
Age: 13

[John]

Ah, memories! ...er, even if I don't remember much of it. XD This is perfect timing since I've been wanting to join an RPG, but I didn't want to interupt the ones that are already started. I think I'll join as my old character from all the RPGs long past: John the Jinjonator. Can I just go ahead and start?

Far away from all the happenings in the icy mountains, John the Jinjonator was walking through the isle of hags looking distraught.

John: Everywhere I look now! Peace and happiness! What's wrong with the world, huh?! There's nothing to do! I've been wandering around like this for three years now!

He enters Jinjo village and is greeted by the colorful sight of Jinjos holding hands and prancing around through flowery meadows merrily singing.

Jinjos: Lala lalala! Trala lalala! La ti do! Merrily we go!

John: AAAARGH! Not even the jinjos need help. Everything's all cupcakes and daffodils! ...wait a sec! My jinjo senses are tingling....or is it that muffin of doom I ate coming back to haunt me. Gah! In any case...

He looks up and sees a flyer posted up on a Jinjo house.

John: Ha! Good old Boggy put up some flyers! Heroes wanted to save the world, eh? This is just what I've been needing! I'll head off to Boggy's snowy abode right this second!

John the Jinjonator flies up and off to Boggy's mountain with the flyer in hand.

[lamentofgrunty]

hero needed okay i be lament a gruntling no longer serving gruntilda.

[mrfleshcadge]

Can't be bothered to do this

[John]

[ooc: No one else seems to be continuing this, so I'm just going to keep going. Come on people! Don't let this die before it begins!]

After three hours of flying, John the Jinjonator arrives at Boggy's igloo. He knocks. No one answers.

John: Um... Boggy? Mrs. Boggy? Anyone home? Well... The sign says apply within so...

He enters. It's dark inside.

John: I'm here to apply for the hero job?

All of a sudden the lights pop on and he sees Mrs. Boggy sitting behind a desk.

John: Ah! Mrs. B! How are y-

Mrs. Boggy: Hello. I am Boggy's personal secretary. Are you here seeking one of the hero positions?

John: Er... Yeah?

Mrs. Boggy: Good. Just take a number and fill out these forms, sign here, and ignore that small print at the bottom. The interviewer will be with you shortly.

She hands The Jinjonator a two foot high stack of papers and scurries off.

John: Okay, then. Lets see what I've got to fill out here. Age... Gender... Contact Information... Species... Past experience... Coffin measurements... Number of licks it takes to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop...

He barely has time to look over the first sheet when he hears a voice over an intercom.

Voice: We are ready for you Mr. Jinjonator. Please step into our office on the double.

The Jinjonator quickly does as he is told. Sitting behind a desk looking down at him are none other than Boggy's kids Soggy, Moggy, and Groggy.

Soggy: We're sorry sir, but the position has been filled.

Moggy: No it hasn't! Just let me do the talking.

Groggy: I'm hungry! Got any burgers?

John: No. Now, where's Boggy? I'd like to speak directly to him about all this.

Moggy: Patience sir. We just have a few questions for you.

Soggy: Answer honestly.

Groggy: How many hours do you normally work?

John: None?

Soggy: How do you handle stress and pressure?

John: With fists?

Moggy: How do you evaluate success?

John: With fists?

Groggy: What are your goals for the next five years?

John: Beat monsters with my fists?

Soggy: If the people who know you were asked why you should be hired, what would they say?

John: That I beat things well with my fists?

Groggy: Why should we hire you?

John: Because I can beat-

Soggy: Stuff it! You're hired! Go down the hall and take the second door on your right to meet with dad- er... I mean the boss.

John: Finally!

Groggy: We've got our eyes on you mister!

He rushes out the room and down the hall to the second room on his right to see-

John: Boggy!

Boggy: Er... Sorry about my family, they get a little carried away sometimes.

John: So does this mean I get payed?

Boggy: No.

John: Darn.

So Boggy fills John in on the goings-on with Mildred and afterwards they watch some TV on Boggy's new Sky+ Box as they wait for the others to arrive so that they can begin the adventure.

[R Hunter]

I would consider it utter blasphemy to enter into an RPG made by Boggy as you guys are teh l33t. However I also don't want this to fade out.
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Suddenly a knock was heard on the boggy home, and a cloaked warrior steped inside.

Mrs. Boggy: Hello sir, may I help you?

???: Yeah, i'm a mysterious hero that wants to fill the position on that sign outside.

Mrs. Boggy: You don't look all that mysterious...

???: Do you see my name?

Mrs. Boggy: No just three question marks.

???: Nuff said.

Mrs. Boggy: Well just fill out these forms and we'll move on to the second stage of the interview.

???: Err...ok?

The mysterious fellow barely manages to finish the mountain of paperwork before being called back. He places the paperwork next to his chair and sits down. The stack is three times taller than he is and that's standing up.

Moggy: So it says here that you're a mysterious warrior.

???: Yes.

Soggy: *squints* Oh, hey R Hunter!

???: *sweatdrop*

Groggy: Right first question: Can we have your autograph?

R Hunter: Err...

Moggy: We have it already! Now all we need to do is put it pn eBay and make hundreds!

R Hunter:...um about the job...

Soggy: Right. Why do you want to help our dad?

R Hunter: I always found his RPG's impressive. It would be my honor to work with him in one.

Moggy: It says here that you're in several already...

Groggy: Not trying to make money on the side are you mister?!

R Hunter:...I can get payed doing this?

Moggy: Not here. Ok what's your ultimate goal?

R Hunter: Uh...save the world again?

Groggy:...hmmm.

Soggy:...hmmmmm....

Moggy:...hmmmmmmmmm.

R Hunter:....

Moggy: Ok you're hired. Don't mess up.

R Hunter: Never.

Groggy: And sign a few more hundred or so autographs.

R Hunter:...can I see Boggy now?

Soggy: Down the hall, second door on your right.

R Hunter: *getting up* Thank you.

All: Hold it.

R Hunter: Huh?

All: Show us your armor.

R Hunter: Err...do I-

All: NOW!

Sighing, R transforms into his armored form, complete with cool glowing and rock music in the backround. The kids all video tape this and rush off to load it onto thier computer. While they're doing this R sneaks out of the office and makes his way to the Jinjonator and Boggy.

R Hunter: Uh...hi?

John: Yo.

Boggy: Sup.

R Hunter: I'm here to fill the position of a hero.

Boggy: Ok. Sit down and wait for the rest to arrive.
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[John]

[ooc: R Hunter! I'm glad to see someone else in this RPG. It would seem that even Boggy has lost interest in continuing this, since I've seen him post in other topics. If we keep going, maybe the others will join in.]
* * *
The three heroes waited... and waited... and waited. Eventually, an entire day came to pass with no new arrivals and they all grew restless.

Boggy: Well, I don't think we can afford to wait around much longer. We've got some serious collecting to do to prevent Mildred's revival.

John: I'm sure we'll pick up some other companions along the way. We almost always do.

Boggy: Hale was about to tell me where we should go first, but...

R Hunter: Did Hale leave any other clues before he was... erm... defrosted?

Boggy: No... I have no idea where too look. He was only able to tell me that they were scattered throughout many worlds.

R Hunter: Well, finding these shards can't too difficult since we don't even need to find all of them to keep Mildred from being revived.

John: Let's go Boggy!

The Jinjonator slaps Boggy hard on the back. The polar bear chokes and something flies clear out of his mouth and lands on the ground with a clink.

Boggy: Ack! *cough*

R Hunter: It's... an ice shard...

John: What the... First jiggies, and now this?

Boggy: Eh!? I have no idea how that got there...

R Hunter: Well, putting the awkwardness of all this aside, at least it's a start.

John: Let's go find a shaman. Maybe they can put an enchantment on that shard to help lead us to the other pieces... or at least lead us in the right direction.

Boggy goes and picks up the shard, and a short victory tune plays. The trio exits the igloo and head off to find a shaman.

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Nowt o' the sort, John. I wouldn't ditch my own RPG in its first page. ;)
R Hunter, were you Ice Key Hunter on the old forums?]

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The adventurous three arrive at Mumbo's hut.

Mumbo: Boggy! It been a while, no? What you after?

Boggy: Well, we're going out on a limb here, but we have an ice shard here. Can you put a spell on it so it points to the others?

Mumbo: Let Mumbo see.

Mumbo inspects the shard.

Mumbo: Can't help. But know someone who can...

John: Who?

Mumbo: You want Mumbo's brother. Enchanting things to point in directions his speciality.

R Hunter: What's your brother's name? Ninja Pinja? Junka Lunka? Gobble D. Gook?

Mumbo: No, his name Michael. He currently lodging at Jolly's, as far as Mumbo knows.

Boggy: Fair enough.

And so the trio, who by now are getting fairly annoyed with trekking back and forth, head to Jolly Roger's Lagoon to find Michael Jumbo.

[R Hunter]

[ooc: No Boggy, though I did use the names Toad and Mysterious Maverick. Admittedly though this name's been my most active one.]
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After treking though the Isle O' Hag for a while, our three heros finally arrive at Jolly's and find Michael Jumbo.[/b]

Mike: Hey dudes! Sup!

R Hunter:...First he's not named after some form of incoherent babbling and now he speaks like a surfer?

Mike: Like YOU turned out just like the rest of your family bro.

John: Err anyway we heard from your brother that you can enchant this shard to find others like it.

Mike: Sure thing dude, fork it over.

Michael puts the shard on the floor and begins to chant in shaman, and as he does the shard begins to glow in a fanit light. After five or so minutes of this Mike stops and gives the shard back to Boggy.

Mike: There you are dudes, one shard locator.

Boggy: Thanks...

Suddenly the shard spins around rapidly before pointing due south.

R Hunter: Odd, it's not pointing to this level...

John: Then where?

Boggy: Who knows?

R Hunter: Well guys I guess this means more walking...

Grumbling the three leave Jolly Roger's Lagoon and follow the shard's compass like pointing to the Pine Grove. WHile walking there they get ambushed by Chilly Willy!

Chilly Willy: Sssssstopppp rigggghtttt theeeereeee!

John: Oh great. Not a few hours in and we already have our first boss battle.

R Hunter: Eh, he wasn't tough enough for Banjo and Kazooie.

Chilli Billi: That's because they fought us seperately!

Like his icy brother, Chilli Billi also flys in front of our heros

Both: You three will face us both together!

R Hunter: Curse you Murphy's Law...

[John]

[ooc: Boggy is still here! ^__^ I should have known better. Leave it to me to jump to the wrong conclusions far too quickly. XD You don't happen to remember what happened in the other RPGs of yours do you? I just remember something about a beach towel.]
-----------------------------------------
The two dragons circle around the group blocking escape on both sides.

Chilli Billi: Eat fire!

Chilly Willy: Eat ice!

They both shoot out projectiles of their respective elements.

John: Watch out!

The Jinjonator jumps into the air, Boggy dives to the ground, and R hunter leaps to the side. The attacks zoom past them and slam into the dragons on the opposing sides.

Chilli Billi and Chilly Willy: OWWWWW! Watch where you're aiming.

The dragons are noticably agitated.

Chilli Billi: You can't keep our pizza from us again foul delivery boys! We paid for our 12-foot Spicy Meatball Pizza up front!

Chilly Willy: SPICY MEATBALL!? We were getting a 12-foot Anchovy Deluxe!

Chilli Billi: Be quiet brother! Let me handle this.

Boggy: We don't have your pizza. We're just hunting for ice shards.

Chilli Billi: Lies! You probably ate my delicious Spicy Meatball slices!

Chilly Willy: ANCHOVY DELUXE! I specifically told that icicle back at Hailfire Peaks that I wanted Anchovy Deluxe, and he said that it would be waiting right here! Luckily, I swiped that shard he was holding as a bit of insurance! Haha!

R Hunter: Icicle? Shard?

Chilli Billi: Whatever! Let's just beat these guys who are so obviously holding out on us and argue about it later!

Chilly Willy: FINE!

The two dragons approach flicking their tongues hungrily.

John: I guess we are going to have to knock some sense into these two.

[Upsilon]

[ooc: John, my memory blanks out after we were attacked by Sunny Steve the towel in Treasure Trove Cove.]

-------------------------

Boggy flails his arms blindly at Chilly Willy, who breathes ice at him, leaving his torso encased in a block of ice.

Boggy: Hey, Billi! You stink!

Billi looks round at him and breathes fire at him, melting the ice, but setting Boggy on fire in the process.

Boggy: Agh! Overcompensation, overcompensation!

While Boggy is rolling around on the ground, the dragons are bearing down on John and R Hunter.

Willy: I'll take the human, you tackle the Jinjonator.

Billi: Hey, wait a minute -

R Hunter armours himself.

Billi: ...yeah, fine by me.

Willy: Damn...

As the last flames on Boggy's fur die out, the two dragons rear up, and the two heroes brace themselves...

[R Hunter]

(Want to know something funny? My mom's name is Mildred. :D)
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R Hunter: *to himself* I lack any of the abilties I use in the other RP's...I wonder what I can do here...

While lost in thought, R is oblivous to Willy, who takes a deep breath and blows out his most frigid cold towards R.

John: Look out!

Being unable to evade the blast in time, R has no choice but to cover himself with his arms as he is enveloped by the icy flames.

Willy: I gooooooootttttt hiiiiiimmm!

Boggy: *having finally put out the fire* R Hunter!

However something just plain odd happens. The flames around R begin to...well the almost liked they're being sucked up. As the icy flames vanish R's armor has changed. Where as before it looked similar to Zero's red armor, it now looks ice blue and is covered in what appear to be dragon scales.

R Hunter:...Oooook.

John:...Boggy did you see that?

Boggy: I did John...and by any chance could we both be seeing things?

R Hunter:...I think I've got it. I think I can absorb any elements thrown at me...and change based upon that.

Smiling, R dashes toward Chilly Willy and jumps, uppercutting the dragon and knocking him onto his back.

R: We're even now, frosty!

Willy: Ssssssssso whattttttttt? I willllll ssssssssstilllllllll finissssssssh youuuu!

Rolling onto his feet, Willy takes to the air and shoots blast after blast of ice at R who allows each to hit, making his armor shift even more as more ice is absorbed. R's armor gains dragon-like wings and a shield made of ice. Placing his hands together R fires out a HUGE blast of icy air, that blows Willy into the Flume of Doom ride.

R: Hey John! Need a hand? If memory serves, Billi hated ice!

Willy: I ammmmm ssssssssstillllllll heeereeeeeee!

Willy suddenly speeds toward R with mouth agape, obviously trying to eat him. R jumps up just as the dragon gets close and kicks Willy right between his eyes, knocking the dragon out...cold.

R: This is very c-

Suddenly just as soon as it had changed, R's armor cracks and shatters, returning it back to normal.

R: ool. Well you win some, you lose some...

[John]

[ooc: Boggy: My memory ends in a similar place. I'm going to save the RPG on my computer this time.

R Hunter: Your character looks sort of like the guy in your Avatar, right? Is this (http://mechadrake.com/fanart/junefanart2/zero_macferick.jpg) him too? (that's what I got from Googling "Zero") I'm just wondering exactly what he looks like since I was thinking of trying to draw some stuff from this RPG, and I realized that I wasn't exactly sure of your appearance. Does your character just appear to be a normal human when he is not armored?]
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An ice shard flies out of the unconscious dragon's claws. Boggy grabs the shard and a short victory tune plays with an animation in which the three strike a pose. A camera goes off from behind Humba's Pine Grove hut.

*snap* *flash*

Boggy: AH! My eyes!

R Hunter: The paparazzi must be tailing me again!

John: I'll get him!

The Jinjonator zooms over to the location of the mysterious photographer and pulls him the fellow out in the open where he is revealed to be a mole wearing dark shades and a trenchcoat.

Mysterious Mole: Wah! Don't turn me in! I wasn't doin' anything wrong! Shades is my name!

John: Shady business is your game, I guess?

Boggy: Why were you taking photos of the fight?

Shades: Some polar bear children offered me large amounts of valuables, not the least of which is a brand new Sky+ Box television, if I could get some pictures of tha' armored fellow over there in action. They also offered me a 15% cut of any profits they made.

Boggy: MY... NEW... TV!

R Hunter: Pictures of me!? What were they planning to do with them?

Shades: I don't ask 'bout details. I respect the privacy of my clients. 'Sides, best not to know too much in case of a bust, ya' know? Said something about a web site though. I got some good clear shots of that ice dragon armor!

R Hunter: Gah!

Shades: Hey! ...Just out of curiosity... You guys wouldn't happen ter have any valuables on yous, huh? I'm... not plannin' to... er... swipe 'em or anything...

R Hunter: No.... we don't.

Shades: Do you s'pose that you'd be able to find some later on if you had some additional moves at your disposal? Firs' time's free ya' know!

John: Are you related to Bottles or something? I've never heard your name mentioned.

Shades: Wah! How'd you guess! I'm his distant cousin! They don't like to speak of me, see?

Boggy: Gee... I wonder why.

Shades: I wonder it sometimes myself! So... do you guys want some moves or not?

John: These aren't illegal or anything... right?

Shades: Why! I'm offended you'd even suggest such a thing! Of course they're not illegal! ...probably... Lessee... Jinjonator.... Aha! I've got the mos' perfect an' awesome move for you!

Shades reaches into his trenchcoat and searches around for something. Eventually he pulls out a wristwatch that says "Molex."

Shades: Wah! That's not it.

He finally pulls out a huge sledgehammer far bigger than his coat and hands it to the Jinjonator. John is... somewhat underwhelmed.

Shades: There you go! Hold the Z button, rotate the analog stick at a speed of exactly 60 rotations per second, use the D-pad in a left right combination 12 times, alternate the left and right shoulder buttons, and press C-up C-left C-Down C-Up 500 times. You can now use your strength for a move I like to call "Hit things with a Hammer."

John: I think I prefer the term "Whack-a-Mole." *readies hammer*

Shades: WAH! Moving on quickly! Anyone else?

[Upsilon]

R and Boggy look at each other uncertainly.

Boggy: Exactly how useful are these moves going to prove in collecting Ice Shard thingummies?

Shades: Wouldn't know about that, sir. You never know till you try, right?

Boggy: Well, I guess I'll have a move.

Shades: It ain't that simple, friend. That one I gave yer Jinjo friend was a free sample. These moves don't pay for 'emselves, y'know...

R: What do you want? Musical notes?

Shades: You got it. Unless you have any organs you'd care to donate?

John: But I thought Banjo and Kazooie took all the notes several years ago.

Shades: Well, you clearly don't have as wide an experience of the world as I do. There are many other worlds beyond the ones Banjo and Kazooie explored, bub. Most of 'em contain a fair few notes, too...

Boggy: And where are these other levels?

Shades: A couple of doubloons might jog my memory as to a particular location...

Boggy sighs and forks out some coins.

Shades: Grand. Now, look around near the Flume of Doom.

R: Oh, come on.

Shades: Oh, fine. Do I have to do everything for you morons?

Shades saunters over to the Flume of Doom and presses a cleverly concealed switch. Stairs rise up from the ground, leading up into the infamous Flume.

John: And where will that take us?

Shades: Why don't you climb up and find out?

The trio exchange glances, shrug and ascend the stairs to find out what undiscovered level lurks beyond...

[R Hunter]

(OOC: Yeah that's him. and I look just like a normal guy when not in armored form. My hair's silver though, not blond like his. As for my armor it looks like his red in normal form and switches based on what I get hit with.)
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After walking up the stairs the three heros step out onto a large island. What makes it unusal is the fact that it's floating in the sky! Suddenly in the air above the three floats the words: MYSTIC KINGDOM.

R: Hmmm...

Boggy: Impressive.

John: Look!

In addition to the main large island are several smaller islands all surrounding it. Some have villages on them, while others have strange buildings. As for the main island it plays host to a truly beautiful castle and four large villages all surrounding.

Boggy: This place is HUGE!

R: Much larger than anything Banjo and Kazooie had to explore. I wonder how we travel between islands?

John:...there seems to be a glowing circle over there...let's check it out.

Walking a short distance from the world entry/exit, our three heros find a rune circle etched into the grassy ground. It glows in a pale purple light...

R: Hmm a rune circle. These are used in most magic spells.

Boggy: Can you read what it does?

R: I can't read these runes, they must be very anicent. Oh well, one way to find out...

John: You don't mean?

R steps into the circle and as soon as he does it begins to glow brightly.

Boggy: Are you nuts!? It could turn you into a toad!

R: Nah, most attack spells that use rune circles vaproize thier victims.

John: Much better...get out of there!

But it's too late, the spell activates and turns R into a ball of energy that shoots off toward one of the smaller islands. Although farr off both Boggy and John can clearly see R's ball hit the island. After five or so minutes he comes rocketing back the same way.

R: *deep breathing* What a rush....

Boggy: Are you ok?

R: You feel like your floating as your body's transformed then ZOOM!

John: Well let's get going then, we still have Mildred to stop...

All three step into the circle one after another and are all shot to the island, which seems to have a small village and a shrine of some sort. In any event...

Thier quest had begun.

[Banjo-Fella]

Feeling an intense energy pulling every fibre of their being apart, before reassembling their atoms in a similar fashion to that of a pool player resetting the balls at the start of his game, our trio teleport onto the island one by one.

Boggy: Wow... and I thought HDTV was cool.

R: What'd I tell you? ZOOM!

John: ...I am never, ever doing that again.

Before Boggy could ask him how he planned on getting off the island without using it, Shades tunnelled his way out of a molehill directly under Boggy, causing him to fall over in a comic fashion.

Shades: How's it going, mates?

He looks around.

Shades: Where's that large-sized geezer gone, then?

R: He's just behind you, I believe.

Shades: Oh, there y'are. Look, you'll need to sort out your balance if you're goin' t'learn any of my complicated manoevers, know what I mean? So, how's the quest goin'? Got me any more goods?

John: Well, we've only just arrived...

Shades: Oh, blewdy 'ell. Look, I suppose you'll need a bit of help, then. Right, fine! I'll do you a favour, you do me one, got it? Now, this place's riddled with musical notes, an' I'd say your best bet is to head into that cave right over there. In there, we'll find us the fabled Ridiculously Secret Area - an' where more could you find some moolah, know what I mean? What do you say, are you coming or will I have to do my collecting all by myself?

Before they can respond, he dashes off into the cave.

Shades: C'mon, we've not got all day!

Our merry band of adventurers peer into the infinite darkness that lays inside. An apprehensive inner-tide pulls urges them back, but they enter, and let the lack of light consume their perception. On they trudge. Over steep ground and downward slopes. They continue this for a minute, until Shades declares triumphantly...

Shades: Well, 'ere we are, then! Our uncharted land - The Ridiculously Secret Area! Cor, what a beut', know what I mean?

The party remain silent, half expecting some great wonder to appear before them - but they can't see anything at all due to the intense darkness.

John: Er, no, what do you mean? There's nothing here, is there?

Boggy: Where are we? I can't even see the entrance anymore.

Shades: Now, now, settle down - all these questions and more will be answered in due time. What do you take me for - some kinda swindler and a-dwindler? Just look, use your eyes for once!

R: We're not as used to looking around in the dark as you are, Shades.

Shades scratches at his grubby trenchcoat for a second, unbeknownst to the others, who can still see absolutely nothing. "'Ell oh 'ell, didn't think o' that one... 'ang on, this gives me an idea," he thought to himself before continuing.

Shades: Oh, yeh... well, yeh'll 'ave to make do, won't you?

Suddenly, he lets out an unconvincing gasp of surprise.

Shades: Quick! Nobody move or make a sound! There's a huge... really massive, like... um, pack of sabretoothed... er, ears headed in this direction!

Boggy: Ears? Are you mad?

Shades: You think I'm mad, an' you think a quest to destroy the bloody shards of a gigantic female oi-scube with big, crazy googly-eyes is grand? You'd want to cop who's on you're side, mate, know what I mean? Now shut up and stay still! They'll hear you! Ears an' all...

Without another word, they stand perfectly still in the pitch dark. Carefully stepping around the party members, he provides some poorly improvised baddie-grunts to keep them convinced. Slowly and carefully, he plunders their goods. Before long, Boggy's two shards are in his possession.

Shades: Ha! Ears! You're bloody nicked, mates! Pleasure doin' business with you lot! I'm sure I'll cop a right pretty penny for this lovely load! Later, sirs!

Shades dashes off further into The Ridiculously Secret Area before any of them can react, leaving them hopelessly stranded in the dark depths.

John: ...I think I speak for all of us when I say; bugger.

[John]

[ooc: Yay! Another player!]
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The three begin stumbling around in the dark trying to find there way back out of the RSA.

John: Well isn't this just grand.

Boggy: R Hunter! Transform into your armor the way you did back when you were interviewing for the hero job!

R: Alright.

R Hunter transforms into his armored form, complete with cool glowing and rock music in the background.

John: Ah! I get it. The glowing! We can sort of see now!

Boggy: Hold on... I think I can see a switch or something on the far wall.

*Boggy pulls the switch*

A gigantic neon signs lights up with the words "Ridiculously Secret Area" above a giant keyhole. Now that the group can clearly see, they notice that they are in a large round room. There is a single tunnel leading out, an unactivated silo in the center, and a molehill near the opposite end which Shades obviously used to make his escape.

John: Hey! I don't see any swarms of sabretoothed ears! He must have been lying!

*Boggy takes John's hammer and whacks him with it*

John: OWWW!

*Boggy reached level 2*

*HP increased by 10, MP increased by 4, Def increased by 6, Hammer Skill increased by 7*

John: Stat increases!? WHO WRITES THIS STUFF!?

*The person sitting at the computer writing this stuff flees, but the Jinjonator blocks his path.*

R: Blast that shady mole! There's no way we can find him in time to get the shards back!

Boggy: He's likely to sell the ice shards to the highest bidder.

R: They have no value to anyone but the icicles, so you can bet that's who will end up with them.

John: The worst part is that they will now have the enchanted shard that points to the other shards! They can find them twice as fast as we can!

R: We'll have to hunt the others down the old fashioned way. They need more shards to carry out their plot than we need to ruin it, so we can still get to enough shards. It's only two that we lost.

John: So... what is this RSA place anyhow?

Boggy: Who knows. It's probably something that the sadistic developers of this game left in to create interest and hype for the sequel and send players on maddening and fruitless hunts filled with ridiculous amounts speculation and frustration.

John: Oh...

R: That single tunnel must be the way we got in here. If we take it back out we can probably get back to the Mystic Kingdom and start hunting to replace the shards we lost.

John: You can bet that we haven't seen the last of that mole. He'll probably come running back to us as soon as we've collected a few shiny objects. I should have whacked his Molex selling arse with the hammer when I had the chance!

The trio makes there way into the tunnel in the hopes that it will take them back to the Mystic Kingdom that they have yet to explore.
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[Upsilon]

R, John and Boggy emerge into the bright light of the Mystic Kingdom.

Boggy: I thought there was something suspicious about that mole. Are we still looking for those notes or not?

John: I suppose not, now it's clear that he's a crook rather than just heavily implied.

R: Where to first, then?

Boggy: Let's go to one of the villages and see if the locals have any information.

They use that cooly magic transport-y thing to get to the main island, then head to one of the villages at random. Walking down the streets is difficult, because the town market is thronged with merchants. The village is clearly very multi-cultural: there are humans, various types of animals, Jinjos, Koopas, Gorons - the list goes on, including beings that even R doesn't recognise.

John: So, where do we start?

After some argument amongst themselves, they decide to pay a visit to the town hall, it seeming the logical thing for a hero to do on entering a new town. There are two guards at the door.

Guard #1: Halt! Do you have any business with the Mayor of Tertiary Village?

R: We are heroes, sir, on a quest to prevent the end of the world as we know it.

Guard #2: The end of the world, you say? As we know it? Hmm... well, maybe a few pieces of gold will let you through...

Boggy: Oh, a bribe? Why didn't you say so?

He gets out his wallet and brings out some coins.

Boggy: Will, oh, five doubloons prove our credentials?

Guard #1: What are these strange coins? Only Mystic dollars are accepted as currency in the Mystic Kingdom? Didn't you even know that?

Boggy: Oh... okay, then. I don't think we have any of those.

John: Erm... is there a bureau de change nearby?

Guard #2: A bureau de what?

John: Never mind.

Our heroes walk away dejectedly.

R: Well, I guess we're going to have to sell something.

Boggy: I'm not selling this scarf, if that's what you mean. It's got a lot of sentimental value.

As our heroes head back to the market, bickering about sentimental versus monetary value, more sinister goings-on are, well, going on in a grotto of Hailfire Peaks.

Shades: I'll give you the pair of 'em for twenty doubloons. Can't say fairer than that, that's cutting my own throat.

Hiver and Blain exchange glances.

Hiver: We will give you five doubloons for both of them.

Shades: Do I look like a mug to you? Twenty doubloons, and that's my final offer.

Hiver narrows his eyes, then smiles, insofar as a being without a mouth can smile.

Hiver: You are clearly a prudent businessman, Mr Shades. Twenty doubloons it is, then. And please... have a cup of iced tea while you're here.

Five minutes later, Shades emerges from the grotto. He counts his money and looks very pleased with himself. Those two icicles were such a pair of suckers. Twenty doubloons!

Shades: Thinking about it, I should have asked for forty. Oh well, never mind. There's one born every -

Suddenly, he freezes, clutches at his stomach and falls to the ground, twitching. The last thoughts that go through his mind as the poison takes effect are: I shouldn't have asked for twenty...

Hiver: Clearly, Mr Shades has not dealt with villains before. Blain, go and reclaim our money from the corpse.

Blain: Very good, sir.

[John]

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Back at the Mystic Kingdom the group keeps trudging on through hordes of villagers while considering what they might be able to sell to get a few Mystic Dollars. All of a sudden John speaks up.

John: Hey! What do ya know! I seem to have found a bunch of Mystic Dollars!

He holds up a handful of large golden coins with the picture of a king on one side and a castle on the other.

Boggy: This means my scarf is safe! But... um... how did you manage it? Money doesn't just pop up out of thin air you know.

John: Well... er... the villagers just seem to be droppin' 'em left and right, ya know? I wasn't... er... pickpocketing people or... anything shady like that...

R: "Droppin' 'em?" Are you sure that you weren't negatively influenced by our experiences with that klepto Shades?

John: WAH! Whaddaya mean klepto!? He weren't nuttin' of the sort!

Boggy and R look up and notice a devilish red rodent of a ghost floating above the Jinjonator's body.

Boggy: Er...

R: Um...

John: Wah! You folks have figured it out have you?

The Jinjonator's eyes glow an even deeper shade of red, and his head does a complete 360 degree rotation on his shoulders.

R: Creepy...

Shades as John (Shadenator): Shades is back for his revenge! I was doing those icicles a favor, and they offed me! Deceased! Dead! Finito! GAME OVER! The worst part of it is that they took back my payment! The nerve of some creatures!

R: Erm... losing your pay was the worst part?

Shadenator: 'Course it was! What kind of twisted priorities do you people cling to? So, continuing on here... I find myself a bit disembodied, see? Mole family secret, that one. I remembered that you folks were on yous way to stickin' it to those death cold freaks an' I want in on it! As you can see, I have the ability to possess weak minded fools like your pal over 'ere.

Suddenly the Jinjonator regains brief control over his body.

John: ARRGH! HELP ME! I'VE BEEN POSSESSED BY THE MANGY MOLE!

He begins whacking himself over the head multiple times with the hammer. Eventually his eyes start to glow again.

Shadenator: WAH! I'm still a bit rusty yet. Anyhow... What do ya fellows say about taking me along?

He pulls out a pair of shades from out of nowhere and slaps them on the Jinjonator's now bruised face.

Boggy: It doesn't seem that we have much of a choice! At least if you're dead, it means that my TV is safe... How do we know that you won't betray us again?

Shadenator: Because it's personal now! I demand retribution! I'll do anything to pour down my firy flames of anguish on those frostlings and get my well deserved cash back! WAHAHAHA!

Boggy: The day you are in possession... er, bad choice of words... of any "well deserved" cash is the day I'll eat my scarf, but fine. You can't stay in that body though!

Shadenator: Wah! Alright... I'm gonna need a thing called a soul gem to contain my spirit though, cuz I can't stay in my astral form so far away from my body wittout a container, ya see? I had a terrible time tryin' to get all the way 'ere hoppin' from body to body.

R: Where are we supposed to find a thing like that?

Shadenator: Leave it to me! They're spiritual items unique to this kingdom. I overheard them icys talking all about 'em when they thought I was through wit this world! Seems they stole a rather large soul gem to capture some kind of apocalyptic doomsday angel spirit for use in some sort of a machine. I think they called it a D.A.V.E. or somesuch thing... Look over there! That fancy lookin' Mystic Shrine! Bet we can find some good loot there! I'll be back in a sec!

The Shadenator leaves the dumbfounded R and Boggy and enters the Mystic Shrine. He stealthily returns a half hour later with a small black gem, two jewel-studded silver candle sticks, a collections plate filled with Mystic Dollars, a bag filled with Ancient Mystic Scrolls, and some expensive looking priests robes.

Boggy: Oh no... no no no... Tell me this isn't happening!

Shadenator: Well, I'm back! I got the gem an' I solved our money problem. Offed two Zubba's with one egg, ay?

R: Doesn't this make us... accomplices?

Shadenator: Don' worry 'bout a thing! I never get caught!

The devil spirit exits the Jinjonator's body and enters the small black soul gem.

Shades: Just call on me if you need to possess any weak monsters! The move teaching offer is still valid for the right amount of notes too! Anyway, I'm gonna rest for a while.

John: Gragur Brag! ACK! That was horrible!

He throws off the shades.

R: It's good that you're back. I don't know how much more of that I could stand.

John: I can't believe he's still trying to sell us those moves of his... That hammer hasn't caused me anything but pain so far!

He rubs his aching forehead.

Boggy: Well... At least we've got some Mystic Dollars now... and Shade's has shut up now too. Lets go... er... bribe... those guards now. *mumbles to self* I think we've hit a new low...

The group heads back to the town hall to... negotiate... with the guards.
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[ooc: We just can't seem to get rid of that guy, can we? XD The first thing that popped into my mind after reading the other post was "Shades' Revenge" and it just kind of sprouted into this. =D]
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[R Hunter]

The heros walk back to the town hall...

Boggy: *showing off the coins* Now how much will it take to get us in there?

Guard: Five each.

*Boggy hands both guard five coins a piece, and both walk away from the door.[/b]

Guards: Go on in gentlemen.

Boggy: As I said, a new low.

R: Bah, no worse then crossdressing to get in somewhere. I swear Cloud must've been drunk again...

The three walk inside and find many secretarys behind medival desks. All are typing on magical computers (If you've seen any Tenchi shows and seen Washu's you know what I mean.) and appear to be very busy.

John: How are we supposed to find the mayor in this mess?

Secretary: *still typing* Three hallways to the left and second door on the right.

R:...Thank you m'lady.

*Navigating the massive hall is rough going but finally all three enter the mayor's office and speak with him.*

Mayor: So, three brave and fearless heros eh?

Boggy: A-yup.

Mayor: Ok then. Listen well, there are exactly ten villages here in the mystic kingdom, each being plaqued by a different elemental. The king wants them all finished off. Get my drift?

John: Sadly, yes.

Mayor: Good. Now get to it, our elemental is lightning by the way. It's odd though...

R: What's odd?

Mayor: Each used to be peaceful, they said they were waiting on some warrior in red armor. I suppose that they went mad after wating so long.

Boggy *eyeing R Hunter* Red armor you say?

John: *Also eyeing R Hunter* We may have some luck with them after all.

R: Er...what're you guys...

[b]But both Boggy and John say goodbye to the mayor before dragging R outside and off into the contryside, to a mountain that has a giant storm above it...

Boggy: You can tell the elementals to calm down.

R: And what if they attack me?

John: Good thing you have that armor.

R:...Nutbunnies.
----------------------------------------
Shade's a evil spirit. That should make for some interesting moments...

[Upsilon]

R: So, this lightning elemental... at the top of this mountain, is it?

John: Stop beating about the bush, you.

The adventurers start to climb the mountain. At first, the incline is very shallow and the going is easy.

Boggy: This is the life, right? This is what makes all the terrible stakes and near-fatal experiences all worthwhile: the easy bit towards the beginning of an adventure.

John: I don't know. A bit dull, if you ask me.

Boggy: Better than being set on fire by an angry dragon.

R: How many shards are we playing for here? I don't recall the mayor mentioning any...

John: Oh, I'm sure they'll crop up at some point. Provided nobody steals them.

John glares at the Soul Gem, which remains silent.

By and by, the group reaches the entrance to a cave.

Boggy: Looks like this is the only way forward.

The cave entrance is guarded by a bored-looking Koopa.

R: Excuse me! Does this cave lead to the top of the mountain?

Guard: Yes. Not only that, but it also features some fascinating stalactites and stalagmites, as well as cave paintings from several thousand years ago. Entrance is five dollars. Apiece.

Muttering something about extortionate prices, John hands over fifteen dollars.

Guard: You know, the soul you're smuggling in that gem is a customer too.

Boggy: But we've only got three dollars left!

Guard: Not my problem. One of you is going to have to stay behind.

The three look at each other, then at the Soul Gem.

Shades: You know, if you leave me, I'm just going to have to possess one of you again. I'm not going to tell you who. Won't it be fun to find out?

The three look at each other again.

Boggy: I've never liked caves myself.

John: I suppose there's no chance of fighting the guard for it?

Guard: What are we, barbarians?

R: Well, see you later, Boggy.

The guard lets John and R in with the Soul Gem.

Boggy: What am I supposed to do while you're gone?

John: Try and do something useful. If you can't find an alternative route to the top of the mountain, try looking around the towns for ice shards!

As his companions disappear into the dark, Boggy observes his surroundings and notices that there are a couple of crags in the rock that could serve as footholds. If one were particularly agile, it would be possible to climb up and over the cave, albeit at a huge risk of fatality. But it just might work

Boggy: Well, shards it is then.

Boggy turns and cheerfully sets off back to the village.

[John]

R, Shades, and John continue through the cave. The path winds around in zigzags and spirals leading them across pits, traps, and platforms. There are small pools of water within the cave that give off an electrified glow. The cave walls are covered with large deposits of soul gems that have yet to be mined.

R: How long is this tunnel anyway?

John: I think we are almost to the end. I can see a light coming from the door at the end of the tunnel!

They exit onto a ledge high with an excellent overhead view of the town. A long narrow staircase has been carved into the side of the mountain leading to the peak.

John: Forget this! We're flying the rest of the way.

The Jinjonator grabs R Hunter and zooms to the peak of the mountain where the storm clouds are emanating from. They land on a large flat area at the top. Waiting for them is a large white tiger with lightning surrounding it's body.

???: I've been expecting you Red Warrior! I am the great and powerful lightning elemental Thunja, Queen of Storms!

Lightning streaks through the sky illuminating her form.

Thunja: MRAHAHAHAHA!

John: Talk about overdramatic...
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[repobanjo]

Well, as I can't play TQ right now, and I am not in any RP's can I join? I did notice that all active RPers here are veterans, so I am just assuming that I will not get most of this.

[R Hunter]

Ok, with all the RP's i'm in, I am busy. But you know what? I love it. :)
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R: *bowing* I am honored great elemental. However I must say that you are causing the village grief.

Thunja: *laughing that sounds more like a growl* No worries, we all just amke some noises and threats and stir up some trouble. That was just to get you to come to us.

John:...Say what?

Shades:...That's even sneakier than something i'd do.

All: I doubt that.

Shades:...I swear you guys treat me like a common thief!

R: *raising a finger and beginning to open his mouth*

Shades: Yeah, yeah I know armor guy.

Thunja:....In any event it was prophecized long ago that the bear of winter's fur, the Jinjo of noble heart and the mole of great cunning would gain the help of an armored warrior to help stop the evil that is trying to awaken...

John: ! Mildred!

Thunja: Or her body at least. You will need our powers to do battle with her.

R: So how does this work?

Thunja: You must battle us all. If you can defeat each of us, we will be contained within your armor until such time as we are needed. However not all of us can be used by you, Rumor Hunter.

R: So some of my friends can use your powers.

Thunja: Yes. Even the mole, though you will have to discover a way to revive him. Now do you accept!?

Thunja roars and a massive storm kicks up around her and R. John and Shades are pushed back, as the storm forms a seal around both.

R: I have no choice. I accept your challenge.

R takes a fighting stance and dons his armor. Thunja grows happily...

Thunja: At last! I can do battle with the red warrior...

Both run at one another and attack, R with his beam sword on his back, Thunja with her claws. Both continue to move at high speeds while John and the spirit of Shades watch.

John: Wow, they're really going at it...

Shades: 50 bucks on the cat.

John: You're on.

R slashes Thunja but a bolt of lightning strikes her, nullifiying the damage.

R:...Shoot.

Thunja: Your blade alone will not prevail against me R Hunter. Use your stronger weapon.

R:....

While R ponders this, Thunja grows to twice her normal size and charges R!

R: Hope this works....

John: Eh? What's R doing?

Shades:...Taking a large chunk out of the ground?

R uses his sword to cut loose a large piece of rock which he then smacks Thunja with, reverting her to her normal size and sending her flying.

Thunja: *roaring* Very well done! Your contribution to your friends will not be your armor or it's forms. Use your head and you will give them the most aid you can. *sighs* I concede, now that you know my weakness, it is pointless for me to fight any longer. You have gained my respect and as a result, my power...

Roaring, Thunja turns into a lightning ball that collides with R. He is enveloped by the ball entirely and is transformed once again. This armor is colored bright yellow and is covered in tiger stripes and spikes. And what's more both his hands and his feet are clawed. And they look very sharp.

R: *gawking* What...?

Thunja: *booming from the armor* When in trouble you can summon my power to give yourself a boost in strength. Also my power can also be used in other moments, just continue to use your head. However until you re-enforce your armor you won't be able to use any forms.

John: So that's why his Ice Dragon armor vanished so quickly?

Thunja: Yes, however R himself cannot gain what is needed. You and the bear of winter's fur must gather it. But for now I shall reunite your group, head south and there face the Ice elemental. She will tell you more.

R's armor turns all three into bolts of lightning that strike right in front of Boggy.

Boggy: Argh! ...wait, guys?

John: Now that was a cool way to travel.

R's armor has returned to normal but unlike the ice Dragon from he can still feel Thunja's form inside somewhere.

Boggy: So how'd it go?

R: Very well. Our next elemental is Ice and that's to the south. But first let's head back to the village, I figure we'll get a shard from each mayor...

Shades: Then hop to it, revenge waits for no mole!

All:....*sweatdrop*
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[Minjo]

Hey,I know I said I would join this RP,but I haven't had many time since the exams,so... could I join a bit later?? (That means this wednesday,and after I read the whole topic)

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Repo and Minjo, feel free. A signature character isn't required, but recommended if you're going to be a long-term player.]
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Mayor: Well, you three adventurers, you have all been most valiant.

Boggy does not deny this.

Mayor: It seems only fitting to award you all with the treasure of our village. Take these magical shards of ice.

The Mayor gives each adventurer an ice shard, bringing their total to three.

R: We most graciously thank you, Mr Mayor. And tell us, do the other villages in this realm possess similar treasures?

Mayor: How should I know? It isn't very polite to ask, you see.

The trio leave the Mayor's office having said their goodbyes, and start to take a scenic route south.

Boggy: If we get a prize like that each time we beat an elemental, we're only going to have to beat six of them.

John: No complaints here.

After a long stroll, they come to the aptly named Southern Village. Unlike Tertiary Village, Southern Village is largely empty and only a few houses are visible. One of these houses has a wooden sign reading "Town Hall" nailed above the door. The village is also covered in a deep layer of snow.

R: Yeah, I'd guess this is the village being plagued by the ice elemental.

Boggy: Ah, now this is more my area of expertise.

The group wade through the deep snow to the Town Hall and R, who is now the de facto leader of the group, raps on the door.

R: Is anyone in there?

There is no response. R slowly pulls the door open and looks inside.

John: Hello? Adventurers here, looking to solve a snow problem?

Inside, there is a small room with a man sitting at a desk. There is a bed in the corner of the room. He does not appear to be doing anything when the group first spot him, but when he notices them, he grabs a piece of paper and a pen and starts scribbling. He looks up at them irritably.

Man: Oh, this paperwork! All such a nuisance! ...ah, hello. Didn't see you there. Welcome.

Boggy: Wait.. are you the mayor:

Man: Yes, of course I am. After all, this is the town hall, and I live here. Stands to reason.

R: This is the town hall?

Mayor: Of course. I live here, and I'm the mayor. QED. Now, what can I do for you?

R: We are adventurers. We hear you're having problems with an ice elemental?

Mayor: Ah yes, of course. Well, welcome to Southern Village. Or Desert Town, as it was known until... well.

John: Yes, I think I see the problem...

[repobanjo]

Thanks! I'll post stats and bios after school.

[BlueBreegull]

Guh... Boggy, John, and even R in a new RP? I can't pass this up! I'm innnnnn!!! I think Journey Quest is managing itself, so I can focus on this one easily enough.
-----

Shift the scene from the spectacular, colorful Mystic Kingdom to a dark, dank stone chamber. Rats scurry fearfully around the many puddles on the floor as two figures approach the center of the room, where an enormous scientific machine powers up. The first figure coughs worriedly, as his colleague straps him to a bed, over which loom all kinds of menacing protrusions.

Figure 1: Harmless, right? Perfectly harmless? I mean, zero chance of error, you say? Right?

The second figure laughed nonchalantly. He wasn't the one strapped to the crazy machine, after all.

Figure 2: Certainly, brother. I wouldn't test my work on you if I wasn't fully confident.

The first figure muttered "All right, Cyan..." and relaxed in his bed, as mechanical arms shifted it to stand upright. The menacing needle devices aimed themselves at him, and only became more intimidating by glowing colors and making charging-up noises. Meanwhile, the figure called Cyan gleefully ran over to a set of controls, struggling not to skip along the way. Again, he caught his brother's uncertain look from the machine, although it was hard to tell, as a sharp glowing blade was poking into his skull.

Cyan: These super-powers will make hero work so much easier! Think happy thoughts, Blue! You need to keep your mind completely calm and content, or this procedure could go horribly wrong.

Blue Breegull, from his uncomfortable position on the mechanical bed, firmly shut his eyes and repeated "Happy thoughts, happy thoughts..." to himself.

Then again, were super powers really necessary? The world never seemed to need saving anymore, anyway! These were peaceful times. By preparing himself for any other waves of evil, he'd probably be provoking it! Still, the thought of adventure and super powers excited him. Nothing ever filled up the gap in his spirit when he, John and Boggy Bear split up. There were other, more recent adventures too, that he much enjoyed. It had only been the previous summer that he, R, and other heroes prevented the hypnotic takeover of a money-loving tycoon and recovered his lost memory... although, as it turned out, it had been he himself that happed let the idea of hypnotic jiggies slip to K. Ching, as he was called, over a lunch at Jolly's.

A sharp prod in the spleen by another pokey arm, followed by Cyan's quick apology, brought Blue back to the present.

Blue (aside): I'm not worried! Cyan's an established bird of science! He knows what he's doing! Happy thoughts! Haaappppyyyyyy!!!

Cyan chuckled quietly as he spilled a mug of coffee, which had appeared from nowhere, on the controls.

Cyan: Heh, whoopsie.

Blue shut his eyes again and made the biggest grin he ever made. He was grinning for his life. Cyan shouted over the din of the charging machine.

Cyan: Alright, I'm about to begin! Clear your mind, Blue! This devce plys offof yr emtions, s-ts crclyimprtnt t...

Blue: What? I can't hear you over the machine!

Cyan: DONT THINK OF ANYTHING!!!

With that, Cyan gave Blue a thumb's up with his forefeather, pulled some levers, and pressed a big red button. With a final electric charge, the nozzles that were placed over Blue all shot out white beams of pure mental energy, electrified properly to interface with his brain, and mutate his abilities far beyond that of any breegull.

Blue: Happy thoughts, happy thoughts... hey, this isn't so bad! I'm feeling... super! I think! This is great! I'm sorry I ever doubted you Cyan, this is wonderful! In fact, I'm so pleased, that I'm completely ignoring all of my instincts to stop saying how well this is going, for fear of angering the Irony Gods and jeopardizing the procedure!

One of the rats managed to crawl up the machine, and onto a gun that was aimed at Blue's head. Drawn by Blue's completely peaceful aura, the vermin scampered down to the nozzle to get a closer look.

Blue: It's working! It's working! I'm aaaalivvveeee! I crave... cheese? What the?

Blue looked up at the rat, which was now impaled at the end of the gun's sharp rod. It seemed to be transferring its dying thoughts into Blue's brain!

Blue: Gah! Rat, go away! Cyan! Help!

Cyan, clearly focused on the monitors before him, only heard the pitch of Blue's voice.

Cyan: Blue, you have to remain calm! If you don't -

Blue: The rat! It seeks to command my brain! Heeeelllppp!

Red lights started flashing on Cyan's control base. A sad face appeared on the computer's monitor, and started babbling to him.

Cyan: Blue, you're exhibiting fear! Quit it, or you'll ruin everything! Ugh, I have to stop before things get too out of hand.

Cyan reached for the 'Abort' lever, but was interrupted when the rat exploded over the ray gun, and sent the mechanical arm spinning around erratically. Cyan, with a cry of shock, barely managed to duck behind the bulky computer as a beam of energy flew by, and fried it! Blue starting screaming and making comical pain noises. Reflective of Blue's thoughts, the white beams turned a sickly purple.

Cyan: Blue, keep calm and I'll get you out of there!!!

Cyan dashed over, but slipped on a puddle and landed with his beak inches from the machine.

Blue: Would you hurry up and get me out of this crazy monkey contraption, so I can use whatever super powers I have to SMASH YOUR CRAZY SKULL INTO BITS?!?!

Cyan: Blue, stop being angry! Your negative emotions are only making things worse!

The electric beams turned to a dark black color, as Blue struggled to get free of the bed. With every curse he muttered, a beam of black electricity shot out of a gun in a random direction, frying one of the hanging lamps, burning a hole in the stone floor, and zapping Cyan's tail feathers.

Cyan: Yooowwwww! Blue, calm down! I'm just going to pull the plug on the machine!

Cyan, soggy with water, dirty with mud, and sizzling with fire, flapped to the over-sized plug and reached to pull it out of the wall. He had it halfway out, when another stray beam of electricity hit him and knocked him between the plug and the wall. Cyan started making gibberish noises, overcome by the electric shock. At the same time, the black beams pointed at Blue turned a sickly green, and Blue starting showing signs of pure insanity.

Blue: A-blu bluh! Jibbles! Acka pootht! Hey, reverend! That's a deadly tie! Praise my absorbent children! I eat lard! Elasticity!

With one final effort, Cyan resisted the electric pain and pulled the machine's plug the rest of the way out. All at once, the noise died down, the beams stopped firing, and the mechanical arms drooped lifelessly. Blue fell out of the bed with a thud.

Blue: ...Ow.

Cyan shook his head to clear his senses, and then ran over to Blue.

Cyan: Blue! Speak to me! Are you alright?!

Blue: I need... band-aid...

With that, Blue passed out in Cyan's wings.

Cyan: Oh, you poor little bird! Don't worry, I'll fix you up!

Blue immediately sprung up at these words.

Blue: Uh-uh! No sir! I'm not letting you point a ruler at me from now on! You and your insane machine nearly killed me!

Cyan: Actually, there was never a chance of that. You would have continued to exist, as a retarded and crippled husk of burnt feathers and flesh.... uhm.

Blue glared at Cyan tiredly, and then headed for the exit.

Cyan: Look, Blue, we don't know that you are all right! I need to inspect you, and make sure you're in good health!

Blue: Forget it, I'll talk to the witch-doctor Mumbo. I've had enough with science for now! Good day, Cyan!

With that, Blue slammed the thick wooden entry door in Cyan's beak, and stormed away from his lab. Cyan spun with dizziness, but opened the door to pursue Blue. From the entrance, he shouted to his brother, who was limping down the path.

Cyan: Waaaiiittt!!! There could still be lasting effects! You could mutate at the slightest touch of an electric pulse! It's not -

Cyan was silenced when his entire laboratory collapsed over him. Blue continued stalking down the path, head sagging, until he bumped into a telephone pole.

Blue: Lousy pole... hey, what's this?

Glancing up, he saw a face he hadn't seen in years - that of Boggy Bear! Underneath was information about an adventure of sorts. Blue tore the poster and read it excitedly.

Blue: Heroes wanted... previous adventuring experience preferred... good pay (maybe)... brilliant! I'm off to Hailfire Peaks!

Suddenly rejuvenated by the prospect of adventuring with his old pal Boggy, Blue took flight and headed for Hailfire Peaks.
---

Continue with your guys' story, and I will catch up in a bit. As for the dramatic intro, it'll come into play later.

[John]

[ooc: Wow! More people are joining! And Blue Breegull too! ^___^ It'll be just like old times!]
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R: So where is this elemental?

Mayor: Take the road of deadly dangers out of town until you reach the gulch of spiky doom and take a right at the cursed stone of agony to travel across the rickety rotting bridge of trials that lies across the pit of unspeakable terror to get to the oasis of excruciating pain where the ice elemental has taken up residence.

John: Sounds easy enough to me!

Boggy: Sure it does... You can just fly over everything.

Mayor: Sorry, but flying is illegal in these parts. It is a law to protect the endangered desert condor who will no doubt die if you fly, and if they all die, then what will the poachers hunt? Our children perhaps? The minimum sentence for breaking this law is 30 years locked in the magical cardboard box of sequestration. THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

John: WHAT!? *whispers to the group* I think living in this hellish place for too long has made this old man a little senile.

Boggy: You think? Moving on... Before we risk our necks to do this, I have to ask. Will we be getting some ice shards for our troubles?

Mayor: Look around you! There's ice shards everywhere you look in this town now! Vwee hee! Have all you like!

Boggy: Umm... that's not quite-

Mayor: Also, be aware that these paths may have become dangerous with all of the slippery ice that has appeared... Hehehehe! *cough* ahem.

Shades: "May have become dangerous!?" With names like the "Pit of unspeakable terror?" Er... I've got a better idea!

John: Let me guess... It involves possessing one of us to steal any shards that the mayor may have and skip the elemental.

Shades: So, how about it?

Boggy: Nothing doing, vermin.

R: So, the road of deadly dangers it is.

The cadre of heroes set out of the town hall to head on the journey

Mayor: Maybe I should have told them about the shortcut through the pleasant path... *ponder ponder ponder* NAAAH! *he goes back to his paperwork*

After a short walk through the frozen town, they reach a small dirt road with a sign proclaiming:

"Ye olde road of deadly dangers. Last chance to turn back. Don't say I didn't warn you!"

John: Well, here we go! Everyone take a deep breath!

Shades: Very funny chuckles! I'm dead and can't breathe!

They began the treacherous trek along the ice covered terra firma. The road was lined with dusty colored rocks, various frozen venomous reptiles, and withered desert flora. As they traversed the dark and misty path, they all began to feel as though they were being watched. However, they set their misgivings aside as the gulch of spiky doom became visible at the far end of the deadly and dangerous trail. Three quarters of the way there, they heard a scuffling sound.

R: I think we're being followed...

John: I have a bad feeling about this.

They slowly turn around to see what evils may dare to lurk behind them.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[R Hunter]

It's there that our heros see three Biggafoot in black trenchcoats behind them...all of which look much more musclebound than your average one.

R: Hello gentlemen.

Boggy: Anything we can do for you?

#1: Hmm...

The lead Biggafoot pulls out three pieces of paper and he and his two cronies stare at each for a few moments. After all three nod in agreement he puts them back in his coat.

#1: You are, Boggy, John the Jinjonator and R Hunter correct?

John: *eyes narrowing* And if we are?

#2: We are about to show you something that will shock you.

R:...Did anyone else predict that?

Boggy: Uh guys this is a family friendly RPG...

#3: No you fools!

All three pull out weapons that look like flamethrowers. However it is apparent from thier ice blue design that these shoot out exactly the opposite.

John: Ah. From Mildred's camp I see.

All: Freeze!

The three fire thier ice throwers but R and John jump above the frigid blasts, each holding one of Boggy's arms. Nodding, John and R toss Boggy at the first Biggafoot, and Boggy nails him dead on, sending him to the ground. John rolls behind the second and kicks him to the ground, grabbing his ice thrower and freezing his legs to prevent him from moving. Meanwhile R's eyes begin to crackle and Thunja's form summons itself by it's own accord.

R: You know what ownage sounds like?

#3: What?

R: This.

A text box appears above R with the text of BOLT 3 inside. R raises a clawed hand and several bolts of lightning rocket out, striking the biggafoot multiple times, racking up damage with every hit.


27!
333!
1023!
5!
462!
AMAZING SKILL!!!!

The FF victory theme plays

Boggy gains a level! Learns-Blizzard!
John gains a level! Learns-Hammer Smash Skill!
R gains a level! MP up!
Shades gains a level! Intelligence up!

Boggy: Seriously, that's getting old.

John: Do we really learn what the text said we did?

Yes, you do.

R:.....Well who says an adventure can't be odd?

Boggy: *to the second Biggafoot* Who sent you?

#2: I don't know, we just got a request in our mailbox....but even if I did know, I would never betray Mildred! Long live our icy mistress!

John:...Let's keep going...wait why did Shades level up!? He didn't do anything!!!

Shades: Heh, i'm just that good.

Boggy: Well let's just leave that for later. And Mr. Narrator! No more corny game RPG talk ok?

And so our brave heros continue walking and finally enter the gulch of spiky doom. It could be seen that when this place was a desert it would be filled with many cacti and rocky pillers and towers. Now that it was iced over, the rocky spikes, were now twice as large and with all the ice around walking would be very difficult...

Boggy: Ok, anyone have any bright ideas?

R: Hmm....

R runs forward, and falls on the ground, sliding underneath the bulk of the spikes.

R: Just slide under and you can get through!

John What's on the other side?

R:....More spikes. oh and long seemingly bottemless pits. And the path looks to be only a few inches wide....

Boggy: Lovely...

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Woo, Blue Breegull!]
-----

Boggy: You know, I think I might be a bit too large to fit under there.

Everybody agrees with this, to Boggy's slight annoyance. They spend a while pondering what to do.

Boggy: Hey, you know when I left you guys to confront the elemental and went back to town and had a drink? I think that went pretty well...

John: Oh, no you don't. I have a feeling we'll need you this time.

Boggy: Really?

John: Well, it's possible. But in any case, this is your adventure, man! Start pulling your own weight a little!

Boggy: Fair point.

R: Look, have you almost finished bickering over there?

John: We're pondering!

Boggy: Hang on. What was that skill you learnt, John?

John: Er, smashing hammer attack, or something like that.

Boggy: Would it work on ice?

John: Well, it's worth a try.

John smashes quickly and efficiently, creating an extra space underneath the spikes for Boggy to get through. Once the two of them have slid underneath, they survey the landscape that lies ahead of them. As R told them, it comprises a bottomless crevasse with a thin, icy bridge leading across it. The sides of the cliff are lined with spikes, both horizontal and vertical.

Boggy: You know, it really did work well when I went back to town that time -

R: Shut up, Boggy. Hey, John, you still got that icethrower you nicked off the Biggafoots?

Shades: Biggafeet.

John: Right here.

John pulls out the large gun, apparently from nowhere.

R: That thing shoots ice, right?

John: Oh, I see what you're saying.

John fires a blast of ice across the canyon and eventually expands the tiny crossing into a bridge several metres wide, with barriers on each side for safety reasons.

John: Hmm, it's out of ammo.

Boggy: Never mind, its work is done here. What was the next bit again?

R: Cursed stone of agony, I think.

Boggy: Sounds like a laugh. You're sure you don't want me to leave you guys to it?

The three adventurers, Shades in hand, stride across the now rather picturesque bridge over the bottomless pit of doom, or whatever, and prepare to face up to the cursed stone of agony.

[John]

John: I think I see the cursed stone of agony up ahead!

Sure enough, a large stone formation becomes visible up ahead. The stone is 30 feet tall and is in the shape of a demonic seraphim with icy tears running down it's darkened face. It's three pairs of wings are spread high above the ground, and it's stony hands grip a twisted sword and shield. Large stone spikes impale it's body, and it's face is twisted into an expression of agony. Ancient runes are visibly carved into the stony form, shimmering with a crimson light.

Boggy: I think I can see why it's called the cursed stone of agony...

John: I recognize these runes. Ancient Jinjolian. The Jinjos had once mastered the art of petrifying powerful magical beings, you see? I myself was sealed on the top of Grunty's lair until such time as my power was needed.

R: So what does it say?

John: In the ancient jinjo tongue it says, "Help! Help! Jinjo! Help! JIIIINJOOO! JINJOLIA! Help!" Roughly translated that would be:

"Beware!
This Doomsday Angel's body sleeps, but it's soul does not.
It once brought pain upon this land until we sealed it's evil rot.
The elemental lords have come to watch o'er this cursed place,
Until the day when heroes come to look evil in it's icy face."

Boggy: How does that translate to... Oh, nevermind. This cursed stone of agony must contain the soul of the Doomsday angel that the icicles are planning to use to revive Mildred.

R: I wonder if this is part of the prophecy that Thunja was speaking of...

Shades: Bah...

John: Alright then... Maybe we should try to destroy those three shards that we have with us. The last thing I want to do is face any form of that thing.

He grabs the shards and lays them on the ground. He takes his hammer and slams it down upon them as hard as he can with his newly acquired Hammer Smash skill. The shards remain unperturbed.

R: Hey! What gives?

Boggy: Perhaps we will find out how to destroy these shards once we gain the assistance of all the elementals.

R: I hope so. Anyway, we are supposed to take a right at this stone to the rickety rotting bridge of trials that lies across the canyon of unspeakable terror. Then we should finally be at the Oasis of excruciating pain where the ice elemental lies. Let's get moving.

They head down the right path and quickly find themselves at the bridge of trials. The bridge, made of rope and rotten planks of wood, is stretched over a long canyon with no bottom in sight. The frozen oasis is visible on the other side.

Boggy: There is no way I am crossing that rickety looking bridge...

R: We have to.

John: It's a bridge of "trials," which means that there must be some kind of trick to it. As long as we pass whatever trials may come at us, we'll be fine!

Boggy: I hope so!

They step onto the bridge, and the scenery around them instanly swirls around and transforms. They find themselves in a large courtroom. A judge wearing a long black robe sits high above them banging a gavel. Eight figures robed in blue stand beside him, four on each side.

Judge: You have been placed on trial to judge your worthiness to proceed to the oasis. You will receive judgment from the secret order of Mystic Guardians as established by the third King of this land nearly 5000 years ago.

Shades: We're screwed.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[R Hunter]

R: Bah, we have nothing to hide!

Judge: And the soul in the gemstone?

John: He has a LOT to hide.

Judge: Then why carry him with you?

Boggy: Long story.

Judge: Fine! For the sake of simplicity and to stall for time to give BlueBreegull time to reach you all...

All: What?

Judge: Nothing. R Hunter! As this is from your perspective you shall be first! Step forward!

R: Ok then...

R steps forward into the defendant's table and sits down.

Guardian #1: First! You have done many good deeds from what we have found....

R: *shrugs* I like to think...

#2: BUT! Were you also "Malice" in the RWPF RPG!?

R: Err well...

#3: And the cause of many troubles/wars because of your SnS Egg!?

R: Now hold...

#4: And on the 24th of August were found to be running around shouting: THE MAN'S AFTER ME! SOMEONE ALERT THE PICKLES!

R: That was due to heat induced mainia. I also said: WHY HELLO MISS! YOUR HAIR TASTES LIKE MOTOR OIL! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

#5: AND you ran over that inebriated disco dancer in Vegas!

R: I...Wait no I didn't.

#5: Aha! So you deny...oh wait that's "Rare Hunter" My bad.

Forty minutes later

R: *In the fetal position* MOMMY!!!!

Shades: I restate that we are screwed.

The Guardians all speak hurriedly amongst themselves before all falling silent.

Judge: Enough! You will find out your fate after your friends are judged! John the Jinjonator! Approach the table!

R: *Still crying* Good luck John!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
It'll be an honor as always Blue. ;)

[John]

John: Here I am, fine sirs. Might I add that that is a lovely shade of blue you all are wearing. They go so well with your... um... eyes that I can't see because of the hooded robes.

#4: You really think so? I was just telling my-

Judge: *bangs gavel* SILENCE! Flattery will get you nowhere. Down to business!

#1: It says here that you have a past history with trials... hrm I see you were apprehended in Banjo-Kazooie 5... at Ripoffland... Mind explaining this?

John: Well for one thing, that was a ripoff of an actual courtroom--Ripoffland, you know. It was a total farce of a court scene!

#5: Law is law to us!

John: But it was declared a mistrial! We weren't even guilty!

#2: It says here that you abandoned the world to the Minjos in Banjo-Kazooie 6! You just up and left before the first world was even complete! The Isle o' Hags was in chaos because of those jolty fiends! Explain yourself!

John: I was... Er... Um... Busy with other things!

#6: So! You are a coward then!

John: NO! I had a life outside of adventuring!

#1: HRRRM! Very interesting! Secret lives and identities... Very interesting indeed!

#3: Just before you began this adventure, you were seen complaining about the fact that everything was peaceful. You also appeared to be downright delighted when you found out that the world was in danger again. This sounds like a textbook example of an insanely villainous mind to me. Explain!

John: Um... I get bored rather easily? And... um... I like to beat things with my fists?

#7: So... You are violent as well! Are you getting all of this?

As he says this last bit he looks down at a small woman typing on a typewriter.

Woman: Yes mista seven! Ev'ry last word!

#4: There are eyewitnesses who claim that you robbed one of our sacred shrines just yesterday! We have photographic evidence! You cannot deny this!

He holds up large photos of the Jinjonator carrying a whole load of loot out of the sacred shrine in Tertiary village.

John: I am completely innocent! I swear it on the ancient Jinjo texts! I mean, it was me, but I was possessed by the ghost of a kleptomaniac mole! Unfortunately, since he's dead he doesn't show up in pictures, or mirrors, but I swear that I was not responsible for my actions!

#8: You expect us to believe such madness? The proof! The proof! You appear as nothing more than a common thief in these photos!

John: Yes... I mean NO! I mean... What!?

#5: NO FURTHER QUESTIONS! TAKE HIM AWAY!

The Jinjonator is taken back to his seat. He is at a loss for words and visibly shaken.

Judge: Last is the Polar Bear! Bring him forward!

[Upsilon]

Boggy steps up to the table, grinning nervously.

#1: Wipe that smile off your face. Now, do you deny that on the 5th of January 1998, consume a golden jigsaw piece that was found to be of great worth, without even considering ownership of said jigsaw piece?

Boggy: ...yes.

#1: Um... is that 'yes' you deny it or 'yes' you did it?

Boggy: Er, yes. I mean, I did.

#4: And in doing so, did you not obstruct the well-known heroes Banjo and Kazooie in their quest?

Boggy: Well, I suppose -

#2: Did you not then withhold not one, but two Jiggies from them until they beat you at not one, but two races?

Boggy: Well, to be fair, m'lud, they were in disguise one of the times. And I didn't know how valuable these Jiggies were -

#8: Silence! So you were, in fact, a conspirator in the kidnap of Tooty the honey bear?

Boggy: Well, I hardly think that's -

#5: And did you not, on the 3rd of February 1999, park your car on double yellow lines?

Boggy: Um, yes -

#7: And you have repeated the incident no fewer than eighteen times since?

Boggy: Well, yeah -

#3: And did you not kill the reputable bartender "Jolly" Roger Malpass, deceased, on the night of the 22nd of March, 2002?

Boggy: What? Jolly's not dead! I went to his pub only last month!

#3: Sorry, my mistake. I mean the reputable housewife Mildred Ice Cube!

Boggy: Ah. Well, about that -

#6: So, not only are you a thief, a kidnapper and a double-parker, but you are also a murderer. I rest my case.

Judge: I've heard enough. Boggy Francis Bear, you are hereby found to be as despicable as the other two!

The adventurers shout objections up at the judge.

Judge: Overruled! The three of you are hereby sentenced to eternal torture in the pits of -

The judge's eyes glaze over suddenly and he stops talking. Then his eyes turn slightly red. The judge coughs nonchalantly.

Judge: Excuse me, I was just thinking of something. Um. Now, what was I saying? Oh yes, I hereby rule that the three of you are most worthy of entering the oasis and that these bailiffs are a bunch of morons, on the condition that the soul travelling in the Soul Gem gets to be the Jinjonator while they're there, because he needs to stretch his legs a bit and you guys don't treat him well enough. Do you accept?

R: Yes, your honour.. er, we accept.

Judge: Champion.

Shades bangs his gavel and the adventurers are magically transported back to the bridge.

John: Well, that was close.

The Soul Gem vibrates and lights up again.

Shades: You're welcome.

Boggy: Shades, what would we do without you?

R: Have five ice shards, for one thing...

As Shades and R quarrel, our heroes cross the bridge and set off for the oasis of excruciating pain.

[R Hunter]

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Some time later...

R: And i'm telling you that now that the other side has that single shard, they can beat us to all the rest!

Shades: That does it.

Shades pops out of the soul gem and possesses R.

Shades-R: Much...hrk...

Boggy: You look a little green there Shades.

Shades: He's fighting!

John: I fought too!

Shades: Yeah but not like...BLEARGH!!!

Shades is thrown from R's body into John's. R is visibly mad.

R: Oh I think not.

Boggy: Wow.

John: Hey can you tell me how you did-

Shadeanator: No sir! I like having a easily controlled body!

R: Whatever...If we can find another Ice Shard, maybe we can get Mike to enchant it again...

Shadeanator: Good plan, we're here by the way.

The oasis of excruciating pain most likely would have been hot to the degree of driving someone mad if they didn't make it to the water in time. Only the water would be hot also so the name would most certainly stick. But now it was just one giant snow field, with a beautiful girl sitting on the frozen water.

R: *walking up* Hello miss. Or should I call you "Great Elemental"?

Girl: *smiling* It's my honor red warrior. And also to you Boggy and John.

John: You know our names?

Shadeanator: What about me!? I'm a hero too ya know!

All:......

Shadeanator: Fine fine.

R: And of your name?

Blizzina: I am Blizzina, Queen of the Polar Frosts.

All the heros bow.

Blizzina: I assume Thunja has told you that not all of us grant power to you correct R?

R: Yes great elemental. As you are ice...Boggy would gain your powers right?

Boggy: Say what now!?

Blizzina: Yes but it must be you to face me in battle.

R: *nodding* I accept.

Shadeanator: Are you insane!? You can't even summon that tiger lady's armor!

Boggy: Besides, I would really like to fight my own battles R.

R: Nevermind Boggy, it's my honor. Out of respect to two RP legends. Three when Blue gets here.

All: What!?

R: *coughing* I said when Banjo gets here.

Shadeanator:...Ok then.

John: Just hurry up! Having a roommate in your head isn't a picnic!

Shadeanator: Quiet, you!

R: *sigh* Let's proceed.

R walks forward, Blizzina creating an icy whirlwind around the two.

Shadeanator: Did you really mean to fight that elemental?

Boggy: No chance. But R's inspired right?

John:...So trick the kid into doing the hard work?

Silence

John: Lovely, use that Blizzard and make us some chairs...

Shadeanator: 50 bucks on the girl.

Boggy makes two lawn chairs out of ice and barring the cold one would feel, (in John's/Shades case as Boggy would be fine) both sit down comfortably to watch the ensueing battle....
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'll take care of the brunt but if you guys want to add commentary or anything of the like, go ahead. I should be back to wrap the battle up later...

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Sorry I haven't been around for a while - I've been pretty busy over Christmas. Anyway, not wanting to steal R's thunder or cut out a good battle scene...]
----

Meanwhile, many miles away, deep in a cave a few hundred feet below Terrydactyland, a meeting is being held. Blain looks on nervously as Hiver interrogates their equally nervous guest.

Hiver: So, have you searched?

Accomplice: Aye, sir. I found this.

He holds out an ice shard.

Hiver: And that is it? I ask you to search all of Gobi's Valley and Terrydactyland and all you have to show for it is this single shard?

Accomplice: With all due respect, sir, I reckons if there was many ice shards there, most of 'em would've melted by now anyways.

Hiver: The ice shards would not have been scattered in such a way that they would just melt. Did you check inside all the pyramids, all the caves? They would be cold enough to accommodate a few shards, surely?

Accomplice: Yarr, sir, I scoured the 'ole place. I talked to every single person living there and pressed everything that even resembled a switch in every conceivable order. I knows a bit about adventuring, sir, and I assures you that there cannot be another shard left there. I wouldn't 'ave found this one if I 'adn't thoroughly checked Terry's nest. This be all there was to be found, sir.

Hiver: Very well. Take your ten doubloons and go.

Accomplice: Thank you, sir, but you know that money ain't my incentive here.

Hiver: Of course, of course. Now, you will go and do some more searching for us, won't you?

Accomplice: I swear by all that be 'oly, sir, I'll get right on it.

The mysterious tall man leaves the grotto with a spring in his step.

Accomplice: Arr, this be like a dream come true. I be finally on an adventure to call me own. And nobody's going to steal me glory this time...

As the man exits the cavern, Hiver looks down at the small collection of shards.

Blain: No iced tea, sir?

Hiver: I wouldn't dream of it. I think our swashbuckling ally will continue to be highly valuable to us. Besides, he assures me he only drinks ginger beer.

Hiver counts the shards once again.

Hiver: Damn and blast! We only have seven shards! How can this be, Blain? We've searched far and wide across the land! We should almost be finished by now!

Blain: We must be missing something, sir.

Hiver: I can only hope that our adversaries are having just as much trouble...
---
[ooc: Hey, you! It might be obvious to you who the icicles' accomplice is, but don't ruin it for our heroes yet, hmm? ;) ]

[John]

[ooc: Oh! I know! It's- *is shot* XD Well... I haven't continued in a while, but I'm going to now. Hmmm... What can I put now, so that I leave the battle scene to R... *makes up random filler*
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Boggy, John, and Shades sit waiting for the battle to begin.

John: So, the mayor of Tertiary Village said that there were ten of these elemental guardians...

Boggy: That's a lot, but it's refreshing to think that they only ever want to fight R. We can just sit back here and relax while all the hard stuff is taken care of.

John: You know, I can't even think of ten different elements.

Boggy: Well... We've seen lightning and ice now. That's two.

John: Judging from other RPGs, I'd imagine that there would be earth, fire, wind, holy, and darkness...

As the Jinjonator speaks the last string of elements, a strange stream of colored lights shoots upwards, and a green-haired, blue-skinned, half-naked man in red appears in the sky flying.

???: By your powers combined! I am CAPTAIN PLANET!

John: What the...

The Desert Town mayors voice can be heard off in the distance.

Mayor: NOOOOOO! THE CONDORS! SIEZE THAT FLYING CRIMINAL SCUM!

Five Desert Shy Guys appear out of nowhere with large cannons and and nets. It's the desert town SG Squad of Justice!

SG1: You sick blue freak!

SG2: Endangering the condors by flying like that!

SG3: It's off to the magical cardboard box of sequestration for you!

SG4: All right boys! Get him!

They shoot their cannons and large jets of electric pollution hit the environmentally friendly super hero.

Captain Planet: Noooo! I'm... just.. trying.. to bring... pollution down... to zero....

He plummets down to the planet and is caught in the nets.

SG5: Mwahaha! Save the Condors!

The 5 members of the SG squad strike a pose and exit.

John: Erm... Lets... just pretend that we didn't just see that.

Boggy: Agreed.

Shadenator: Anyway... That makes it up ta' 8 elements... What else is there?

Boggy : Well... *sings* There's antimony, arsenic, aluminum, selenium, And hydrogen, and oxygen, and nitrogen, and-

John: Um... I don't think so.

Boggy: It could happen.

While wondering about what other elementals they--er R Hunter--might have to face, they look over to see how the battle is faring.

Shadenator: They haven't begun yet? What's up wit' them? Just starin' at each other. It's been a half hour already!

John: Hmmm... Look! I think it's about to start!

Boggy: No... I think R Hunter was just stretching.

John: Oh! I think this time's the real deal!

Boggy: Nope. Blizzina was just fixing her hair.

And so it goes. When they'll start, nobody knows.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
[ooc: Yay for random filler! Maybe I should have just left it alone. XD]

[R Hunter]

[ooc: i'd NEVER ruin it for our heros. I however am curious as to why said tall guy would help Blain and Hiver.]

R: Ok. We've given enough time for further plot points and random humor to be used. Now we begin.

Blzzina raises a icy hand and a gale force wind blows out from it. R is caught dead center in the frigid air and is frozen solid.

Boggy:...Well that was anitclimactic...

John: Wait!

*The ice around R begins to seep into him and in a shattering display, he breaks free, in his ice dragon armor.*

R: Now we're on an even playing field great elemental!

Blizzina: Sadly no, The dragon of which you gained that form from holds powers far weaker to mine.

R: Maybe so but it makes for a really good distraction wouldn't you agree?

R grins as a ball of lightning shoots up from the ground and hits Blizzina dead on, wrapping her in a orb of powerful voltage.

Blizzina: *strained* So....you're learning how to use Thunja's powers....

R: I am.

Blizzina blows out air so cold, the ions in the electricity lose thier charge and the orb dissapates. The icy maiden then blows out more air and creates twin ice spears that she grips in each hand.

Shadenator: Oh this won't end well.

R: Hmm...

The two fighters trade strikes back and forth, R mainly using his hands to block, and his feet to deliver kicks to the queen of ice and snow. However it is to be noted that his kicks all have a slight charge to them all.

Blizzina: Why do you insist on using Thunja's powers to fight me?

R: It's a well known fact that electricity gives off two forms energy namely heat and light.

*R's armor breaks one again as he uses all of his remaining strength to zap Blizzina woth a huge ball of lightning as his body freezes. The others are watching this awed over it.*

Boggy: R's frozen!

John: But the stereotypical loss of heros doesn't usually happen until mid adventure!

Shadenator: Oy, you two are hopeless. Look! She's undoing her ice spells!

Both: Eh?

Blizzina raises her hand to the air and at once the desert returns to it's normal tempature. And that means that the chairs Boggy made melt in seconds...

PLOP! PLOP!

Boggy: Ow!

John: Nice.

However R is still frozen solid, in the same position he was in as he threw the ball of electricity. John and Boggy walk up to R sadly and bow thier heads.

Boggy: He was a brave bloke...

John: Always willing to help...

Shadenator:...Uh...he had cool armor!

Boggy:....Thanks for that...

Blizzina: He will thaw out, the desert heat will melt anything that enters it.

All:...Oh lovely...

Blizzina: Fear not, I will send you back to town and wrap the two of you in winds that will keep you cool until you leave the area. Head west now, the elemental of time awaits.

Boggy: Say what!?

Blizzina: And this elemental would do well with a Jinjo...

John: *looks around then points to himself* Me?

Blizzina laughs and enters Boggy's body. He glows a pale blue and the group warps to town again. R's ice begins to melt just as the maiden predicted, the heat making him thaw at an alaming rate.

Boggy: It's a shame we're not getting paid for this.

*At those word the mayor come out of his house*

Mayor: You did it! Our town owes you a great debt!

John: No problem.

Mayor: Oh and here, I found these in my cellar. You said you wanted ice shards right?

*Our heros gain another 3 shards and a bag of Mystic Dollars. About 500 coins fill the bag.*

Shadenator: Whoohoo!

R: *finally thawing* I vote Boggy holds the bag.

John: Seconded.

Shadenator: You rotten spoilsports...

Boggy: Then west we head!

Our brave heros leave the village, not knowing thier fate or the significance of the battles they're facing due to the elementals....
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*grin* I'm rested, the holidays are over and we can all begin work again. Huzzahs are in order. :)

[Minjo]

[Time for Skell to join!]
------------------------------
Upon heading west, our main heroes find a lonely graveyard, which seems to have been abandoned for a lot of time.

Boggy: Look over there! It's a soul gem!

R: In this creepy place? I wonder what's doing here...

Soulgem: Re...lea...se...

Shadenator: Nah! We won't stop to help that thing...

John: Shut up! we helped you, remember?

Shadenator: Well... that's completely different!

Suddenly the gem begins to glow, and you could hear its voice more clearly

SJ: I...beg...you...release...me

Boggy: OK let's help him before the place begins to scare me more!

R: But we may need a body for it

Boggy: What could work?

Then all look at John, who is extracting a nose nugget

John: Shades stop doing that! And why is everyone looking at me?

R: Sorry pal, but...

John: What the...? No... I already have a nasty spirit inside me! Only you or Boggy can hold him

Shadenator: Why do we help that thing anyway?

Boggy: Silence! I'm gonna free the soul no matter what you say!

Boggy breaks the soul gem, and a mysterious spirit comes outside it, however the soul appears to lack of shape

Spirit: ... YAAAAAHOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

All: Uhhh?

Spirit: Thank you young travelers! *notices Shades inside jinjonator's body*... uhh... and old rodent too!

Shadenator: **** you!

Boggy: *slaps John* This is a family program!

John: Hey! You slaped me!

Shadenator: Hahahahaha! I love being a spirit

Boggy: Sorry John! Anyways, what's your name spirit?

Spirit: My name? Errr... my name? right right, my name... ummm... you see... my name is... ummm... err... is....

Several minutes later

R: Look dude we don't have your time! So tell us your name or we'll leave to the next element

Spirit: Problem is... I have been inside the gem for hundreds of years! I forgot my name!

John: That is a problem y'know

Spirit: But wait! I still remeber how did I ended here!

Boggy: Really?

Spirit: Nope, but you can help me, right?

Shadenator: Could someone just give a doublon to this hooligan?

Spirit: No thanks, I have thousands of them! But in this shape... i'm not sure what will be of me... or what happened to my eternal love!!!

R: What? YOU HAD A LOVE? *laughs*

Spirit: Believe it or not, but I can remember her name! She was Mil...

Boggy: OK 'nuff! You already took many of our time! Just tell us what the heck do you need?

Spirit: First, a body

R Hunter notices an open tombstone lying nearby

R Hunter: Over there! It's a corpse! And it's a bit recent!

Spirit: Well... it may work... *enters the skelleton*

Now he has been revived!

Spirit: This feels so... lame...

John: You know what? We are calling you Skell!

Skell: GREAT! Now the second thing I want, is... to... JOIN YOU

Shadenator: No way! Why do you wanna come anyway?

Skell: I'll tell this later, but please! The first step to my mission is at the Temple of Time!

R: Then let Boffy decide...
------------------------------------------
[occ: Mind if I am a hero?]

[Banjzooie]

Boggy thinks for a minute.

Boggy: All right... You can join us.

Skell: Yay!

Boggy: But your trip to the Temple of Time will have to wait. We have to find the element of Time first.

Skell: It's somewhere in this graveyard...

Shadenator: Probably beneath that big gravestone.

John: What gives you that idea?

Shadenator: C'mon, fellas. I mean, it's so obvious... To guys who actually have brains, s'that e'scludes all o' ya.

R Hunter: Shut your foul mouth mole... Well, come on you guys, let's get under that gravestone.

Boggy: But I don't know how to dig!

Shadenator: I do. I'll try an' teach ya if the price is right.

R Hunter: D'oh, we haven't been collecting notes...

???: Someone say notes? I've got like fifty here and I don't know what to do with 'em.

R Hunter: That voice!

R Hunter wheels around and faces a truly freakish sight, one so scary that Boggy, John and Shades all scream.

Boggy: It's a... Zombie..

John: It's a... M-m-mutant!

Shadenator: Cripes, it's that guy who I swiped all those eggs fr--Er... I mean... It's a monster!

R Hunter: No... It's Banjzooie! BZ, what the heck are you doing here?

The creature, sporting Banjo's head and torso, along with Kazooie's wings and legs, turns to R Hunter and grins.

Banjzooie: Looking for you guys.

Boggy: R Hunter... You... Know this guy?

R Hunter: Do I?! Oh yeah, BZ and I go way back, back to the Banjo RPG!

John: What are you, you, uh... Banjoozie, was it?

Boggy: No, I think it was Banjizzle.

Shadenator: I like to call him "Pidgeon". He practically ate out of my hand and handed his eggs to me! I wanted his sword, but I didn't wanna risk it...

Boggy: Sword?

Banjzooie: The name is "Banjzooie". You wanna see my sword? I'd sure like to show it to dead mole-boy there. *Draws his sword*

John: Geez, that's the Master Sword! Did you swipe that?

BZ: No, I got it from the End of Time.

Boggy, John and Shadenator: End of Time?!

BZ: Let me explain... R, you're gonna have to help me out here...

R Hunter: Right with ya. You see, wwaaaayyy back about twenty-five years ago...

John: That would be when Mecha-Grunty ruled over everything, wouldn't it?

R Hunter: Right on. You see, Mecha-Grunty and Klungo did not want Banjo to find Kazooie and take her back to the future.

BZ: Their solution? Make a clone of Kazooie that would lure Banjo away, and then kill him.

Shadenator: Looks t'me s'though somepin went horribly, horribly wrong.

BZ: That's putting it mildly. Banjo's DNA was mixed with Kazooie's, thus I was born. Notice, along with my more prominent hybrid traits, I have two different colored eyes, one blue one from Banjo and one green one from Kazooie. As for Klungo and Mecha-Grunty, they wanted to pitch me out because I was useless to them, but that only served to make me mad. You see, Klungo also gave me a gene from ASKTRE.

Boggy: The famed fake secret maker?

R Hunter: The same. BZ was so angry that he used that great power to drive Klungo and Mecha-Grunty out of the lair. He then left himself to try and find a place to live, but no bear or bird tribe would take him in. He went back to the lair, but by that time Grunty and Klungo had all ready been beaten and sent back to the future. He was stranded.

BZ: I still tried to find shelter, but there was none that wasn't taken. I eventually met younger versions of Grunty and her sisters, and they all beat on me... Well, not Brentilda... But after that, I holed myself up in a secret area of the lair, which would become one of the unlockable doors in the beauty room twenty years later. I stayed in that room until Grunty was beaten for the first time, and left only to steal the light key (a secret SNS item) from Blackeye when he entered the lair in search of the other secrets, and then locked myself up in my room again until two years later when Grunty was beaten once again. It was at that point that P.o.t.O, Bottles98, Banjo, Kazooie, Blue Breegull, Dark Breegull, Golden Jiggy, Banjo's Banjo, the Wanderer, LeGeNdArY bAnJo EgGs, Bolt Dragoon, and R Hunter here set foot in the lair in search of the twelve SNS eggs and the three keys which were needed to unlock the Big Whoop, which could grant one wish, any wish.

R Hunter: BZ found out about the Big Whoop and wanted to steal it for his own then-selfish intentions. He found that the Magenta Egg at Sharkfood island had all ready been stolen, but replaced it with the fake Midnight Blue Egg which he created using his ASKTRE powers, to distract everyone else. He left Treasure Trove Cove (leaving Dark Breegull to take his fake egg) and pursued the other eggs, but failed to attain any others. He wound up inside a hideous slime beast named Nanoshape, and, after a time-rip in which he relived his past and changed to the good side, played Nanoshape's core in a game of Scrabble for his very life.

BZ: I won and defeated the core, and left Nanoshape's dimension. It was then that I came upon R Hunter, Golden Jiggy and Blue Breegull. R Hunter killed Nanoshape before he could escape, and then asked me to join him and the others. I asked, "...Don't you find me repulsive?"

R Hunter: But then I said, "Look around. All of us are different, but we're still friends." After a bit of dramatic crying, BZ joined us. He would gain the gray egg and the Master Sword at the Temple of Secrets, which was contained at the End of Time. By taking it from far beyond the future, he did not risk it not being there for Hyrule in the present when they needed it. As for the Gray Egg, it allowed him to travel through time. He helped all of us defeat LBE and a much greater force... True Evil, and Great Light.

Boggy: Woah, this is a lot to take in... But wait, you guys stopped Light as well as Evil? What were you thinking?!

BZ: Light wasn't truly being good. It was waging war, just like Evil. We had no choice. Anyway, we stopped them and for six months lived very peacefully. Well, I did anyway on the Pikmin planet, R on the other hand wound up splitting from his dark side. Me, him and several of our friends had to reunite R with his dark side to stop a much greater force known only as Agony.

R Hunter: Three years would pass uneventfully, and then BZ and I would go on an adventure to stop a dragon called Vira... But we didn't. That RP never went anywhere. Into Summer of that same year however, we, along with Blue Breegull, would stop the nefarious Richard K. Ching from dominating the world with his hypnotizing Neo-Jiggies.

Boggy: Neo-Jiggies? I remember those things being advertised... I even remember the ad... That weasel guy K. Ching said that Neo-Jiggies were much better than Normal Jiggies, and we should buy them. I didn't see what was so great until the Neo-Jiggy flashed, then I felt like I had to buy them.

John: Yeah, I remember that ad too, and I had that same feeling.

Shadenator: Enough all ready! R Hunter, we just asked you how you knew this guy, we didn't want his and your life stories!

R Hunter: Sorry... We got a bit carried away. BZ, I have to know though, how did you get here and why?

Shadenator: Oh no... Not another flashback!

BZ: It's inevitable mole boy.
------------------
This story segment is far too long too fit in a single post.

[Banjzooie]

The breebear begins telling the group his story...

BZ:You see, I was watching TV a couple days ago, when I saw an ad on TV. It had Boggy's kids on it, and they were asking anyone with any heroic talent to come and apply at Boggy's house in Hailfire Peaks for an adventure, that Boggy needed help to recover the shards of Mildred the Ice Cube before her minions could. I was only happy to have another adventure, so I got in my trusty Arwing and flew off the Pikmin Planet and jumped to Banjo-Kazooie dimension. I landed my Arwing in Hailfire Peaks and applied. After going through a pile of paperwork five times bigger than me, I allowed the kids to interview me. I asked for Boggy, but he had all ready left with John and R Hunter. But they asked me to get about a million autographs from R Hunter after they found out I knew him.

R Hunter: ...That's getting really, really old by now.

BZ: I imagine. But anyway, they pointed me in your direction, so I traveled in that direction and hoped I'd find you. I wound up at Mumbo's. He said that you'd just left to see his brother. I asked, "What's his name? 'Hocus Pocus'? 'Abra Kadabra'?" Irony having the cruel sense of humor it does, Mumbo said to me, "No. Michael." He told me that Mike was in Jolly's bar in Jolly Roger Lagoon. Upon entering the bar, you guys weren't in sight; the only guys around was this surfer-dude. I asked, "Do you know if Mumbo's brother Michael lives here?" He said, "Yep, you're looking at him dude!" After telling irony how much I hated it, I asked him if they'd been here yet. Mike said, "Those dudes have come and gone, dude. They wanted me to enchant their ice shard so it could track the others. I happily obliged, and performed a gnarly spell that did just what they wanted. They went that way!" Following where he pointed, I arrived in Witchyworld. I met up with a certain thieving mole just outside the Plume of Doom. He was snickering and staring at these two ice shards he'd just swiped. When he saw me he quickly hid them, and rather than fight I simply asked if he'd seen you guys. He pointed to the inside of the Plume of Doom. Before I could enter, he said, "Y'know, it's rough in there. There's sabre-tooth ears in there." I replied, "Saber-tooth ears? Are you off your rocker?" He said, "Probably, but dat ain't the point. The point is, to fight them off you'll need some of my moves!" I said, "Okay then, got any good ones?" His response was, "Probably, but you won't know unless you pay up!" I had collected several notes all ready, so I forked them over, and he said, "I'll teach you the ancient art of the Spin-Attack. First, draw yer sword with the 'B' button. Then, close your eyes, continue to hold B and focus your energy. Yeah, just like that, keep goin'..." Five minutes later he hadn't told me to release, so I asked, "Should I release B yet?" But he didn't respond. I opened my eyes, and he was gone, as was the supply of eggs I had in my backpack. I'm just glad he didn't steal Bob here...

John: Bob?

A golden hero chao sticks his head out of BZ's backpack.

BZ: This is Bob. I found him just before the JQ RPG, thrown down the Station Square Sewer as an egg. During JQ a trench coat-wearing grifter almost stole the egg from me using Neo-Jiggy hypnosis, but it was then that Bob hatched and in a great flash of Golden Light broke my hypnosis and knocked out the Grifter. I learned that his power is purification, and he also specializes in energy attacks. Though at first he could only speak chao, thanks to a translator invented by Lightning, son of Bolt the breegull (no relation to Bolt Dragoon), he became able to speak English.

R Hunter: If it weren't for that chao, we never would have stopped K. Ching.

BZ: Yeah... Say, mole boy, why didn't you try to steal him?

Shadenator: Well... Er... Uh... Oh man this is embarrassing *John's body blushes deeply*... He looked so cute sleepin' so soundly like that that I couldn't bear ta steal 'im. But I stole your eggs, so you didn't have any way to attack from a distance!

BZ: I'd like them back, please.

Shadenator: Couldn't give 'em back to ya if I wanted to. You see, when those ice cubes poisoned me, they took everything I had on me, including the ice shards and most likely your eggs.

BZ: If the ice cubes have my grenade eggs, that's bad. They could blow us out of the water. I have every kind of egg that Kazooie does.

Boggy: That means you have fire eggs!

BZ: Yeah, but I can't use 'em thanks to mole boy here. The ice cubes most likely left them with his corpse so they wouldn't melt. Anyway... Frustrated, I headed into the Plume of Doom to try and find you guys, and wound up in this place full of islands on clouds. Stepping on a rune, I was taken to another island. It was not a pleasant trip... I traveled back and found the mayor of Tertiary city, who said you'd gone to challenge the thunder element. I went to where she was supposed to be, but mole boy had wasted enough of my time that I was very far behind and you'd already beaten her and moved on. I went to a different city covered in snow, and met the mayor. He said this was Desert City, or at least used to be. He kept wandering off track in our conversation, mumbling things about condors and sequestrian cardboard boxes, but after half an hour I finally got him to tell me where you went. I followed his directions, passing a strange, eerie statue and nearly being condemned by demonic judges. I reached the site of Blizzia, but she and you guys were all ready long gone, and had the mayor not held me up I would have caught up with you. I ran as fast as I could back to the mayor, got him to tell me who the next element was and where she resided (while trying to convince myself that that was not Captain Planet inside the magical cardboard box), and ran so fast to try and catch up that I broke the sound barrier and made sonic booms that could wake up the dead.

John: May I ask how you could possibly do that?

BZ: For plot convenience I can do anything. I don't think I can run that fast ever again... I slowed down upon approaching the graveyard, and then heard this thieving mole talking about notes and sped up to catch you guys.

R Hunter: Sounds like you've had a long and tiring trip.

BZ: Yeah. But the good thing is, I've found you guys and I'll join you in seeking out the remaining elements. We're seeking "time" now right?

Boggy: Yeah. It's beneath that huge gravestone, and Shades was about to teach us to dig...

BZ: So you need notes. Here Shades, take fifteen. *Hands the notes to the Shadenator*

Shadenator: Oooohhh, yes! All right, dung brains, listen up and clean out yer earlobes! To dig, you need to get the shovel claw from the Mystic Ruins...

R Hunter: I love Sonic Adventure, but this isn't it.

Shadenator: Whoops, wrong game, my bad. To dig, hold "Z" to crouch and then press "A" and "B" at the same time. Simple eh?

BZ: I paid fifteen notes for that? Oh well...

Boggy, BZ, R Hunter, John/Shadenator and Skell go to the huge gravestone. They begin digging with their bare hands, and after fifteen minutes they uncover a tunnel. They go inside, and, upon exiting it at the other end, find a whole city laid out before them.

Skell: This city... Look. It's frozen. And everything's in black and white.

Indeed, the sky is a dull gray, and people in the streets are frozen. Some are in the middle of talking, buying, trading, even fighting, but they're all as still as statues.

Shadenator: Well, I'm bettin' that if the mayor's like anyone else here he's too frozen to tell us anything.

John: Frozen... In time!

R Hunter: We don't need to see the mayor to find out what's going on; it's obvious what the element has done to this place.

Boggy: But how will we find the element with no one able to tell us where he or she is?

BZ: Your guess is as good as mine, Boggy.
--------------
Sorry I'm late guys. Do you guys mind if I join you? John, Boggy, It would be an honor if I could RP with elite RPers like yourselves. And I'm always ready to RP with you R Hunter. Blue, I hope you come back to this RPG soon.

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Banjzooie, you're more than welcome. Nice to see you too, Minjo.]
---

The adventurers wander aimlessly through the city streets. A sign at the city's entrance reads "WELCOME TO QUATERNARY TOWN".

Shadenator: You know what's bothering me? How come we're not trapped in place by some sort of frozen air?

John: You know what's bothering me? How come we now have two soul gems but aren't using either of them?

Shadenator: All right, all right.

The Soul Gem lights up again.

John: Oh, that is such a relief.

Boggy: So far, the elementals have always been somewhere outside the city itself. So I guess we look for some exterior landmark?

Skell is looking at a tourist information office.

Skell: Maybe if we go in there, we can find some clue? I mean, there might be some information about a nearby landmark?

Banjzooie: Worth a try, I suppose.

They wander inside, working their way around frozen customers, and look at the leaflets and brochures adorning the shelves.

R: There's a whole shelf here dedicated to Quaternary Lake.

He removes a leaflet and strains for a few seconds.

R: Well, I can't open it. I guess it's frozen in time, like the people.

Boggy: Says here on the back: "Feel like a relaxing break away from the hustle and bustle of the city? Why not try unwinding at Quaternary Lake? This huge beauty spot lies off the beaten track, but it's well worth the twenty minutes' walk from the city centre! Whether your thing is water-skiing, yachting, swimming or just lying back and enjoying the scenery, set an hour or two of your time aside for Quaternary Lake!" Well, it sounds nice.

John: Worth a try, if you ask me.

The group, who now number six, leave the information centre and are about to set off for Quaternary Lake when they realise that they don't know which way it is.

Skell: Is there a map on the back of there, R Hunter?

R: Ye-es... but it's not very adequate. Woe betide the shoddy brochure-makers of today. Look, this town's roughly hexagonal, and this map shows a path leading out from one of the six edges. Nowhere does it say which edge we're supposed to leave from. For heaven's sake, who approved this piece of garbage?

Banjzooie: No, it's okay, look. Here, it says "Leave the city by the clock tower at the edge of town and follow this path." So, we clearly need to go from over there.

He points to a clock tower in the distance.

Boggy: I hate to break it to you, but...

He points to another clock tower at the opposite end of town.

R: ...there are two of them? How are we supposed to know?

He throws the inadequate leaflet to the ground and jumps on it.

John: Well, I guess we could split up.

Boggy: Um, don't we kind of need R to fight the elemental? So what if the group without him goes the right way?

Skell: Er, we can communicate via the soul gems?

Banjzooie: You can do that?

Skell: Oh, yeah. I spent rather a long time in that one and I happen to know that souls in separate soul gems can contact other gem quite easily. Whoever sees the lake first can contact the others and, um, wait around until they arrive?

There is a long pause while the others try to find the flaw in this plan.

Shades: Sounds good to me.

Boggy: All right, then. I'll go with Skell and John. Banjzooie, R and Shades can go together. Does that sound good?

There are sounds of mutual consent.

Boggy: Perfect.

The two groups set off.

[John]

[ooc: It's great to see some more people joining! ^__^]
---------------------------
Having split off from the others, Boggy John and Skell begin the long hike towards the clock tower. As they move closer to it, the buildings and streets suddenly become surrounded by a blur of movement. The surroundings are still black and white, but in contrast to the dull gray pallor of the frozen sections, everything here radiates a brilliant white glow.

John: What's wrong with this part of town? I can't make out anything except faint blurry shadows!

Boggy: Every once in a while you can almost see the shape of certain things... It's as if this section is the opposite of where we just came from.

Skell: I see... Instead of being frozen in time, everything here is accelerated to the point where you can barely even see anyone!

Boggy: The town seems to be torn down the middle into these different dimensions of time... We didn't notice it before, because everything looked frozen over here until we stepped through that laceration in time.

John: The elemental probably created opposing time warps in both clock towers that pulled on each other and produced enough force to tear the seams of continuity. One to speed things up, and one to slow things down. When the elemental is beaten, everything should snap back together.

Boggy: In any case, we should be careful.

John: All of this blur is making me sick... Skell, contact the others and relay this news!

Skell: What? That you're getting motion sickness?

John: No! The news about the clock towers and the acceleration.

Skell: Oh, right.

Skell grabs the soul gem and holds it upwards. It begins to glow for a few minutes, and soon afterwards a string of beeps can be heard.

Skell: It's no use! The line is busy!

Boggy: What other souls would Shades be calling?

John: We probably don't want to know. In any case, let's get to the clock tower. Skell, keep trying to reach Shades.

Skell: Way ahead of you!

After five more tries, the Souls Gem finally connects.

SG: You've reached Shades Mole, suave adventurer and treasure hunter extraordinaire! I'm not available at the mo', but fer the right price I'm yours! So say a mess-

John: Shades! Cut it out with the fake voicemail thing!

SG: Er... Right. Jus' tryin' to have some fun ya' know! Sorry I weren't available b'fore. Lef' the gem off the hook for a bit of reflective 'me' time. Findin' the inner light and all that jumble... I most definitely weren't really contacting 1-666-DEDGRLZ for... well... erm, what's up?

Skell tells Shades the new information.

SG: I'll let 'em know then! We don't have nothin' to report as of yet. I'll contact Skell when we do!

With that out of the way, Boggy, John, and Skell head off towards the Clock Tower and hopefully the exit of Quaternary Village.
--------------------

[R Hunter]

(OOC:BF would be a great player to work with Shades character, or his own. And BZ, you know i'm always ready to RP with ya. Let's get going..)

In dire contrast to the side that Boggy's group is exploring, the people walking in the side that R, BZ and Shades are walking through are moving at an extremely slow pace. Even at a crawl, R and BZ are having no trouble moving past them. Shades relays the information from Skell to R and BZ.

R: Hmm...I think I get it. Because of the opposing warps, the center of town feels a combined effect of the two. This cancels both out and as a result...

BZ: Time itself stops.

Shades: Well that's all well an' good but which way's that Elemental?

R: It could be at either, time flows forward and backward....wait...

R and the others go back to the tourist information building and gather another leaflet. looking at the city makes it resemble a clock, with the most important buildings positioned at 3 and 6 o'clock. The two clock towers are at 12 and 6.

R: Ok. Now if you were a spirit that could control time itself, where would you reside?

BZ: Well he's in the lake, and that's past one of the towers...wait! 12 is the start of both morning and night!

Shades: So the lake would be at the top of the clock then?

R: *nods* And that was the way we were headed...

Shades: I'll tell Boggy's lot then...

BZ: Ok. But something's bothering me.

R: What's at the other side of the clock...

BZ: *nods*

After speaking with Skell, the group heads for thier tower again and pass it. Suddenly time itself seems to stop, speed up, and slow down before resuming a somewhat normal flow. A old man can be seen sitting at the edge of the lake staring into it.

???: What awaits your friends is what is needed to best me in combat.

R: ?

???: Think warrior, how can you overcome someone that can stop your every move and avoid your every attack?

R: I'm not sure but i'm going to try to see.

R rushes the elemental but suddenly is caught in a time warp. He moves slower and slower until he stops completely.

Chronos: I am Chronos, elemental of time. And your quest ends with me i'm afraid...

While meanwhile...

???: There they are! Now I can help them!

A tiny pixie appears in front of Boggy, John and Skell, as they have come to a forest that layed beyond thier clock tower.

???: Hi!

John: Uh...hi?

Boggy: Who are you?

Liza: I'm Liza and i'm here to tell you about a new power you can use!

Skell:...Ok.

*cue RPG-like explenation menu*

All: Oh no, not this again...

Liza: Now you all know of Summoning right?

John: Yes but this isn't Final...

Liza: Well you can do that here too!

Boggy: And we don't use MP or...err what was that?

Liza: You can summon any elementals you have in your party to fight in a battle! Sometimes only they can attack a foe!

Boggy: But I though only R could use thier power...

Liza: That's only when his armor gets something returned to it. And even then that's only to obtain the powers of elements he doesn't use. Boggy, you are an ice user, hence only you can use Blizzina's powers.

Skell: Ok so what do we do to use thier strength?

*Suddenly a menu pops up underneath our heros that reads:
Attack
Defend
Summon
Items
Flee*

All: ARRRGH! THIS IS NOT FINAL FANTASY!

Liza: *laughing* Just kidding guys. Actually just call the name of the elemental you want to summon and he or she will appear. Keep in mind though, you will be weakened after they attack.

Boggy: Thanks Liza, so I guess this makes you our guide then?

Liza: Yep! Just call me if you need help!

John: One thing though. The elemeantals said they wanted to fight R only. Wouldn't this mess that plan up?

Liza: How well do you think you would do against someone that can freeze you with a hand wave?

Skell: Good point. Let's get going!

The three rush off for the other side of the village, as Liza vanishes in a puff of smoke. As for R and the others Chronos is using his magics to make R move forward and backward in time perpetually.

BZ: Let my friend go!

Chronos: This battle is between him and I alone. And sadly for you, you chose the path to me...

It seems as if our heros quest won't even make it past the first level! Can Boggy and the others make it in time? What other forces could the remaining elementals control? Will there be even more various game references to annoy our heros!? Probably. ;)

[Upsilon]

The three rush back into the village, John leading the way and Boggy lagging behind, clutching at his chest and panting.

Boggy: Hang on... guys... got a stitch...

The other two look irritably at Boggy then at their accelerated surroundings.

Skell: Was that building there when we left?

John: Must have been built while we were gone.

The three continue at a slightly slower pace.

Boggy: What's going to happen when time goes back to normal? Won't this half be several years ahead of the other half?

John: Oh, I'm sure they'll figure something out.

There is a long pause while everybody thinks roughly the same thing. Skell is the first to voice it.

Skell: Um, also... wouldn't we look like statues to these people?

John: I know! Isn't it weird how none of them have thought to investigate it yet?

Skell: Sure is convenient.

Just in case, the three try and keep to a considerate path, not walking in front of any doorways in case someone sees fit to move them.

Boggy: Agh!

John: What?

Boggy looks down at his stomach. Suddenly a message has appeared on it in spraypaint: "Leshko Rulez".

Boggy: Bloody vandals. When time's back to normal, I'm going to find this Leshko kid and sock him one.

Skell: Well, unless he's died of old age by the time we're back.

Soon they reach the time divide. Crossing over it is an uncomfortable sensation.

Skell: Whoa... I suddenly feel a lot faster.

Boggy: Thank God we're out of there. I still think it's a miracle that no-one picked us up and moved us.

John: Maybe we were being protected by some greater force.

Whatever the case, the three pass through the frozen half in what seems like much quicker time. When they emerge, and have recovered from the unpleasant effects brought on by the time change, they hurry down to the lake. When they get there, they can see an old bearded man lying by the water's edge and relaxing. R and Banjzooie are both frozen in an attack position and the Soul Gem is hovering in the air above the ground.

Chronos: Oh, hello. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Chronos. Guess what I'm the elemental of? And you must be the other three bold adventurers, correct?

Boggy: That's right. What have you done to our friends?

Chronos: Come now, you're not that thick, are you? You just said that for the sake of having something to say, didn't you?

Boggy stares at his feet, reprimanded.

Chronos: Anyway, they're frozen in time. Rather sinister, I'm sure you'll agree. I mean, you people must be pretty nervous in the knowledge that I could just freeze you all now and leave you like that for centuries. In the blink of an eye for you, everyone you know would be dead. Wouldn't that be horrible? Alternatively, I could speed you up to a million times the normal rate. You'd be wandering for the rest of your lives in a world of statues. Are you scared yet? Here, let me give you a taste.

The sun jumps across the sky and Chronos appears behind them. They swivel around.

Chronos: There. You were just frozen for, oh, three hours? Pretty formidable, right? And there's nothing you could do about it, I'm afraid.

Skell: Guys... I don't see how we can beat this one.

Boggy: I'm summoning Bliz -

Boggy freezes in mid-sentence. The other two glare at Chronos.

Chronos: Oh, fine. Crybabies.

Boggy: -zina.

As Boggy looks around and frowns perplexedly, a popping sound is heard and, in a burst of ice, Blizzina appears.

Blizzina: Ah, Chronos. I'd expected you'd give them some trouble.

Chronos: This is stupid. The prophecy says that one of the adventurers has to beat me.

Blizzina: There's a prophecy?

Chronos: Well, not as such, but if there was one, that would definitely be the sort of thing it would say.

Blizzina: True. But Chronos, this is patently unfair. You're supposed to give them a chance.

Chronos: Look at this from my perspective, Blizz. This time thing is the only thing I have going for me. Without it, I'm just a puny old man.

Blizzina: Well, fine. But if you're going to use it, then I suggest laying down a few ground rules.

The two walk off, arguing together.

Skell: Well, that was strange.

Boggy: I was sort of hoping that she'd own him in combat or something.

Almost instantly, which leads our heroes to suspect that some temporal shenanigans were pulled, the two elementals return, Chronos looking grumpy.

Blizzina: We've come to an agreement: Chronos bestows one of you with his powers for the fight, and neither of you are allowed to use them directly on each other.

Chronos: Fine. I choose the Jinjo.

John: Wow. Cool.

The Jinjonator and the elemental prepare for battle, with Blizzina watching as referee.

Chronos: It's time.

John: Well put.

[John]

Chronos holds out a wooden staff, and a stream of energy flows into the Jinjonator.

John: Oooh! I get to use time powers to fight you! Yes! I'm so excited!

The Jinjonator promptly unfreezes R, BZ, and the Soul gem from their midattack poses, and after gathering their bearings they join Boggy and Skell to watch the battle.

Skell: So, do you really think that he can beat the old guy? He doesn't exactly seem like the brightest twinkly on the strand at times...

Banjzooie: I find myself in agreement with the skeleton.

R Hunter: As long as he gets serious, I think he might have a chance.

They look over to watch as John freezes the lake in time and starts skipping across the surface.

John: Wow! I'm walking on water! This is so cool! *dances*

Chronos: Yes, yes. Stop playing around and get to it! I'm not getting any younger you know!

He unfreezes the lake, and the Jinjonator falls in. Soaking wet, he flies back out.

Boggy: This... could be bad.

The Jinjonator straightens himself up and floats towards Chronos.

John: Alright then!

They both begin to speed themselves up with the powers of time.

Chronos: I'm not going to go easy on you, young one!

John: Who are you calling 'young one'? I'm over 10,000 years old!

Chronos: Ha! Merely a trifle compared to my life! I have existed since the very beginnings of time!

They race at each other and dodge blows for a while before they slow down again. Chronos raises his staff up into the air.

Chronos: It is futile! I am much more experienced with these powers!

It becomes night all of a sudden and seven stars supernova up above.

John: Trying to scare me "Father Time"?

Chronos: I'm just trying to imprint upon you the hopelessness of the situation!

A meteorite speeds down from the sky headed towards the Jinjonator. He barely dodges, and the firy rock collides with the lake creating a massive wall of water. The Jinjonator freezes the enormous wave before it can crash into the battleground.

John: That was close...

Chronos waves his staff, and time begins to splinter around him.

Chronos: It's time to finish this pathetic battle! We have already been fighting for an hour.

John: Really? Well, time flies, and, unfortunately for you, so does this!

The Jinjonator tosses his hammer, handle first, at the old man while fluctuating it's speed in time. Chronos dodges and the time fissures begin to expand.

Chronos: Kehehe! If that's the best you can do, then you are finished!

John: Oh really? It seems that you have forgotten something.

Chronos: And what would that be?

The hammer returns at faster than light speed and slams into Chronos' head with a sickening thud.

John: Rewind!

Chronos falls to the ground and his attack fizzles out.

Chronos: *ack* *cough* ...I'm getting far too old for this... I accept defeat. I will restore time, and grant you my power.

Blizzina: As referee, I declare the Jinjonator the winner!

Chronos grabs his staff and presses a button labeled the "Chronos Trigger." The flow of time returns to normal. Quaternary village itself... does not. One half of it is now a bustling city of the future, while the other half has remained as it was before the time halt.

R Hunter: I guess we can go find the mayor and request some shards now, although depending on which part of the village he is in he might not have even noticed anything was wrong.

Boggy: Leshko, here I come!

The two elementals go to their users, and they all begin to head back into the village.

John: I get the feeling that I'm forgetting something...

At that moment, the wave of water, now unfrozen, crashes over the group, soaking them.

John: Oh...

[Banjzooie]

The group heads back to Quaternary Village. The city is now colorful rather than the drab gray color that blanketed it and the sky not long ago. The right side of the town is merely hours ahead of where it was when it was frozen, still a present-day city, though slightly ahead of the center, which had been completely frozen, and is exactly as it was before. The left side of town, on the other hand, contrasts greatly, sporting buildings, equipment and people from at least a millenium ahead of its time. The group heads to the very center of town, where the signs say the mayors' residence is.

Skell: "Mayors'"? Must be a typo. It should say "Mayor's".

BZ: Maybe not. I think I know what we're going to see when we enter the mayor's house.

R: You and I, BZ, we're on the same page here.

They reach the mayor's house, or, more accurately, the mayor's mansion.

John: Unique design... Half of the house is made out of bricks, and the other half is constructed of titanium!

Shades: A house like this one is one-in-a-million. Why, think o' the kinds o' prices I could get if I was to sell it!

Boggy: Let's not. Hmm... There's three doors here. One on the right, a current-looking one. One on the left with a futuristic look to it. One on the middle that looks semi-futuristic, with a the words "Out-of-towners' Entrance" engraved in it.

John: I suppose we should take the middle one then.

Boggy and the rest walk up to the middle door, and the polar bear rings the doorbell. Footsteps... Two pairs of footsteps. Each member of the group wonders who will greet them? The one who was mayor at the time town was frozen, or the mayor of the future? The door opens... Two men stand before them, both in their fifties.

Men: Hello there! We're Mayor Leshko!

Boggy: L...Leshko?! Why I oughta...

Mayor Leshko (right): You've heard of us? I'm Bill Leshko, the first.

Mayor Leshko (left): Bill Leshko the seven-hundred-and-eighty-fourth. Mister polar bear, sir, you look somewhat familiar to me... Oh, now I remember! You were that bear statue that I--Oh no...

Boggy: Oh, it was you, eh?!

Mayor Leshko (784th): Please, you must give me a chance to explain.

Mayor Leshko (first):

And so the group enters the house of the two mayors' awkwardly divided house.
--------------
How's that for a plot twist?

[R Hunter]

(OOC: Just to make sure this stays alive i'll repost this segment...)
R:...And so that's why your town is in this state.

Leshko (1st): Ah. So Chronos used different time fields on both sides of town.

Leshko (784th): Oh, so I was moving so quickly, you all looked like statues. Mister polar bear sir I am so sorry. Teenage pranks and the like.

Boggy: Hmm...

BZ: Ok so what're we going to do?

John: I could summon Chronos to help out.

R: Hmm...And fix the modern side of the city?

Skell: That sounds like it would work.

Leshko (1st): Ah but what of all of us that live in the here and now?

Shades: Why you all would be...err...

R: Gone.

Leshko (both): Don't worry, our town will fix itself. both sides will unite to make a town that is united on all sides of it. Now we assume you are travelling warriors?

BZ: Yes sir.

Leshko (784th): Then you should head south through the woods. That will bring you to another rune circle, that will take you to Azure Village, town of endless skies.

Us: Gotta be an air elemental.

Leshko (1st): Actually I hear that a dome has surrounded the entire village, shrouding it in eternal darkness.

Skell: So it's a darkness elemental?

R: Not going to be an easy one.

Leshko (both): Here this is our town's treasure. it's yours now.

The two mayors open a safe and pull out a amulet. However is an ice shard!

Boggy: How did....

Leshko (first) It was found by a friend of mine not too long ago.

John: Well we have another shard guys.

Shades: Well let's be off then! Revenge and all!

The band of heros all bow and walk out of the mayor's home and begin walking through the forest. As they do R asks Boggy a wuestion...

R: Hey Boggy, how did you know how to summon Blizzina to help?

Boggy: Well this pixie named Liza just flew in out of nowhere and told us what to do.

R:...*sigh* Our RPG guide then?

John: It seems that we'll be facing more references as we go along.

BZ:...Hey look!

In front of our heros is a light blue rune circle, it glows dimly...almost linked to the plight of it's twin in Azure Village.

John: *shaking his head* No way. There's no way that you guys are going to...HEY!

Boggy, R and BZ all lift John up and sit him in the circle. As he warps away each steps in and follows...but when they get to town...

R:...Guys?

BZ: We're here R.

Boggy: I can't see!

John: I know! It's pitch black out here!

Skell: Well this is great...how are we supposed to find what we can't see?

Person: A good question.

All: Isn't...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

Boggy: Who's there!?

Person: Just a resident of the village. You folks must've come from Q-town am I right?

R: Yessir.

Person: Ah. Word has been spreading round the villages and towns about a group of travelling heros. So you fix the mess it was having?

BZ: More or less. Half the town's more advanced than the other.

Person: Bah, the folks over there can move quick. i'm sure they'll have that sorted out by the time you visit again. Now follow the sound of my voice and i'll lead you to the mayor, he'll fill you in to our little problem...

So amid our group bumping into various unseen people and objects, we all head for the mayor's home...

[Banjzooie]

The group follows the mysterious person by his voice.

John: Oof! We keep bumping into random people.

Citizen: Watch where you're going!

Citizen: ACK! Are you blind?!

Boggy: In this darkness, who isn't?

Mystery person: Ignore them, just follow me.

BZ: Y'know guys, there's an easier way to do this.

Shades: Is 'at so? Why didn' cha say so in the firs' place?

BZ Opens his backpack and pulls out his loyal chao partner.

Bob: Sssnnnoooorrrre...Chhhaaaaooo...

BZ: Yo, Bob! Wake up!

Bob: Snuck--Who-whuh-huh?!?! Aw, BZ, did ya have to wake me up? I was having the greatest dream... Hey, why's it so dark, chao?

BZ: Something to do with the darkness elemental.

Bob: Darkness elemental? Chao? I thought we were going after the time elemental!

BZ: We fixed everything there. You slept through the whole thing. Now we're going after darkness. We can't see a thing though. Can you give us some light?

Bob: Sure, why not?

Boggy, R, John, and Skell: No! Don't do it!

Bob glows a bright golden blow, illuminating a small amount of the area around the group.

Citizen: AAAAHHH!!! TOO BRIGHT!!!

Citizen: TURN OUT THAT LIGHT!!!

BZ: *panicking* Er, um, Bob, stop!

Bob immediately desists.

John: Are you crazy?!

Boggy: What were you thinking?!

BZ: Huh? How was I supposed to know-

R Hunter: BZ. Think. What happens after you've been in the dark for a while?

BZ: Your eyes adjust to the darkness.

R Hunter: And then what happens if you turn on a light?

BZ: Your eyes--Oh crap... They take in way too much light and it causes a great deal of pain.

Skell: Had you not stopped your chao from emitting light sooner, you could have blinded some townspeople.

Mysterious person: They'll be all right. Just follow the sound of my voice.

After about ten minutes, the mysterious person askes them to come to a halt.

Mysterious person: The mayor will see you now. I must now bid farewell.

The footsteps of the mystery person grow softer until they can't be heard at all. A voice startles the group.

???: Visitors? Now there's a rarity in our town.

An extremely dim gas lamp sparks to life on an end table. On the chair next to it sits a man. Because of the dimmness of the lamp they can only make out his frame, but it is somewhat skeletal. He speaks to them in a feeble voice that's almost nothing more than a whisper.

???: Greetings. I am the mayor of Azure Village.

Boggy: Hello mayor. We came here to solve your problem.

As their eyes adjust to the darkness, the group can make out the features of the mayor. He is bald, small, and frail. His eyes, deep black, have almost none of the light of life in them.

Mayor: Ah. I doubt I need to tell you what it is?

John: It's pretty apparent. Your town is surrounded in darkness.

The mayor's eyes are suddenly filled with light, but it's not the kind, benevolent, understanding kind of light in them which you would expect to see in the eyes of an old man, but rather a malevolent, almost sinister light.

Mayor: You think this is bad?

Shades: Well, uh, yeah, considerin' the fact that it's really hard to get around and none of you guys livin' here can leave without blinding yourselves.

The light leaves the mayor's eyes.

Mayor: Yes, yes, you're right...

R Hunter: Mayor, how did the village get like this.

Mayor: It's... Quite a story... It involves me, and, and...

The evil light reenters the mayor's eyes.

Mayor: ...And it starts with me!

The mayor seems almost proud of this before returning to his sad, sorry state.

Mayor: You see, when I first became mayor of this town, I was as good as any. But over the years, I got more and more money and luxuries, and became greedy and contemptuous. I became a bad, evil mayor over time.

The evil light returns to the mayor's eyes, and they almost seem to flicker red.

Mayor: I did as much as I could to get money! I taxed the townspeople 50%! I started shutting down businesses that cost our government a lot to hold up! I evicted several homes!

BZ: How... How could you?

The mayor suddenly becomes guilty.

Mayor: I... I don't know. I just wanted more money for me. I didn't care about the townspeople anymore.

Boggy: If you were so evil, why didn't the town impeach you?

The mayor stands up and his eyes glow red.

Mayor: Hahaha... Impeach me? Impeach me?! They were frightened of me! I threatened the village's government! I will do horrible things to them if they even think of impeaching me! As for other candidates for office, I'd always find some way to get the candidate to not show on election day, or if they did, the townspeople would be...be...

The mayor collapses into his chair, his eyes all but lifeless.

Mayor: They would be too frightened of me to vote for anyone else. I can't believe I've let this happen.

John: What's with this split personality thing? One moment you're mourning and apologizing for all the evils you've done, and the next you're proud of them!

Mayor: As I slowly turned evil, there was always still a part of me that felt it should not be. I would regain myself in short bursts and try to repair the damage, but something would be there to jumpstart my greed and selfishness, turning me evil again.

R Hunter: I think I see what's happening here. Mr. Mayor, the darkness elemental is possessing you.

Mayor: Yes, but it's no one's fault but my own. The darkness elemental is made of nothing but evil thoughts. I had so many of my own that I opened myself up to possession. I can't stop it. *turns evil* And I don't intend to!

R Hunter: You can stop the elemental, Mr. Mayor, listen to me. The darkness elemental is made of evil thoughts, yes. But your evil thoughts don't control you. You control your evil thoughts!

Mayor: You think you can stop me? ...Rrr...Raaargghh!

The mayor falls off of his chair and begins writhing in pain. A dark, black cloud exits his body. He stands up unsteadily. He nearly falls over, but Boggy and John catch him.

Mayor: R Hunter... Thank you. You were right. I was letting myself be controlled because I did not believe I was strong enough to oppose the darkness elemental, but the bulk of what allowed him to enter my body was my own dark thoughts, so by putting them aside I was able to break his grip on me. You see, over the years I grew to hate the elemental that possessed me. Little did I realize I was making him stronger. He eventually grew powerful enough to create this wall around the town.

BZ: Couldn't he have done that without you?

Mayor: Yes, but he didn't want to simply imprison the town. He wanted to lead it, to claim it. Inside my body, he could not use any power that wasn't gained from my own anger and evilness. So he amplified my evil thoughts.

Skell: But now that you're released from him, shouldn't the darkness disappate?

???: I think not.

The dark cloud which left he mayor's body takes on a vaguely human form.

Darkness elemental: While I may no longer be able to control the mayor, I have not lost the power I gained from him while inside his body. I will now head off to my lair and proceed to do what I could not while in his body. Unless, of course, you think you can stop me. But that is not possible.

Darkness transforms into a black-furred Boggy.

Boggy: Wha?!

Dark-Boggy: You made me...

Darkness turns into an evil jinjonater.

John: What the?!

Dark-John: All of you.

Darkness becomes a sinister mole.

Shades: What da heck is zis?!

Dark-Shades: Don't you morons understand?

Darkness shifts into an evil skeleton.

Skell: How can you transform into us?

Dark-Skell: I am you.

Darkness morphs into a breebear with black fur and feathers.

BZ: I was you in my earlier years.

Dark-BZ: You still are.

BZ: No, I'm not! I've put my dark thoughts behind me!

Dark-BZ: But I'm still a part of you. You cannot destroy your own dark side...

Darkness grows to ten times his size, and is now a Zero look-a-like.

Dark-R: ...Without destroying yourself. You, R Hunter, know that better than anyone.

R Hunter: I sure do. I learned that back when I was an Astral Knight. And you know what else? I learned that the good and evil sides of a person can actually fight together to make peace!

Dark-R: Preposterous! That makes no sense!

R Hunter: But it does. If you put your dark thoughts behind you, you can control them, turn them into pure negative energy. Negative energy itself is not evil. It resides in all of our atoms in the form of electrons. By turning our evil thoughts into negative energy and combining it with the positive energy of our good thoughts, we can create unbelievable power, which can be used for whatever purpose we wish, good or bad.

Dark-R: ...Hmph. While you may have a point... Since you cannot defeat me, I wonder how exactly you plan to get me to relinquish the town. And remember...

Darkness becomes a golden chao, but a dark-type chao rather than a hero-type.

Dark-Bob: Even the smallest person has evil in them.

Darkness reverts into a dark cloud and flies off.

Boggy: He has a point... How can we free the town without defeating him?

R Hunter: We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Right ow, we have to find darkness. Mr. Mayor. Can you tell us where darkness's lair is?

Mayor: Certainly. He took me there many times while possessing me. First...
------------
I couldn't think of where darkness's lair should be.

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Sorry for my lack of posts. I've had a life lately, which is why I haven't been around.]
----
Mayor: First leave the town by the west road and you should come to the river. Follow it upstream as far as you can and you should reach the Azure Caves.

Boggy: Caves?

Mayor: Well, it wasn't going to be a beach, was it?

John: What do we do when we reach the cave?

Mayor: Go as far down as you possibly can. Then you'll find it.

Skell: I have a question. How are we supposed to reach these caves if we can't see anything?

Mayor: Your eyes should grow accustomed to the darkness soon. Failing that...

He looks round furtively and rummages in a drawer. He takes out an electric torch.

Mayor: If you can't find your way, use this. But keep it pointed at the ground at all times. We don't want to cause any trouble, do we?

The adventurers leave the mayor's office and are plunged again into total darkness.

R: Is it worth trying the torch?

Boggy turns on the torch, pointing it downwards. Immediately gasps and yells are heard from all round, and various villagers cover their eyes. He quickly turns it off again.

Boggy: Perhaps not. Sorry!

Banjzooie: We're not working to a strict schedule here, are we? If we kick around here for a few hours, our eyes might adjust. If they haven't adjusted by the end of the day, we'll have to feel our way out of town.

Boggy: Setting off at dusk? Wouldn't it be better to wait till mor-

He pauses for a second.

Boggy: Er, never mind. Come on, then. Let's see if there's an inn anywhere near.

[John]

[ooc: Wow, I should apologize as well. I hadn't realized how long it had been since my last post here. O__O The days have just been flying by lately.]
---------------------------

R Hunter: Gah! This darkness! There is no way we are going to find an Inn like this!

John: Lets ask for directions! *yells out* Hey you! Townsperson who I just bumped into! Where is the nearest Inn!

Stranger: Oh that's easy! Take a left at the Cerulean fountain! You can't miss it! 'Tis plain as you can see me standing here.

They hear the footsteps as the stranger hobbles off into the darkness.

Shades: Well that was a right a load of help, weren't it, seeing as we can't, ya' know, see?

Boggy: Shhh! Listen.

They focus there ears and sure enough they can hear water flowing in the distance.

Banjzooie: That must be the waters of the Cerulean fountain. If we head in that direction, we should be able to find the Inn.

They head off in the direction of the sound of water. After traveling about ten paces a large splash is heard.

John: Well, I found it. Let's just find that hostel so that I can get dried off now.

They turn left and eventually they feel a building ahead of them. They find a door and enter. A man approaches them.

Man: Welcome to Cobalt Cottage! If you would like the master suite it will be 6 Mystic Dollars a piece! I recommend it heartily, as it has a downright breathtaking view! You've never see anything like it!

Skell: Well, that sounds like a tremendous waste of MDs...

Boggy: Er... We'll just take cheapest lodging you have, thanks.

Man: Oh well... 1 coin a piece.

They fork over the cash and a short transitionary music plays. Ten seconds later they are back out in the lobby.

John: Well that was the shortest rest I have ever had.

R Hunter: It's an RPG... What did you expect?

Banjzooie: Has anyone's eyes actually adjusted?

Everyone answers no simultaneously.

Skell: We should keep waiting here until they have adjusted and discuss our options. We still have no idea of how to stop this elemental.

Boggy: Lets recap what we already know about the nature of darkness, and see if it gives us an idea.

R Hunter: We already know that we can't destroy this elemental without destroying ourselves, so the only option is to earn it's respect in battle as we did with the other elementals. We have to focus on the non-evil negative energy that makes up the dark impulses that he embodies.

Banjzooie: You can't completely defeat darkness, just as you can't completely defeat light. As one expands itself, the other will diminish. They balance each other. Without balance there is chaos whether it be darkness or light.

John: We know that this sphere of darkness doesn't eliminate all light as seen by the Golden Chao and the electric torch, and since the villagers eyes have adjusted enough to be able to see faintly, it means that not all light was eliminated.

Skell: So... we are merely in deep shadow?

R Hunter: Precisely! Without light darkness cannot exist. The elemental purposely allows a small percentage of light to exist within this sphere. As one source of light is ignited, an equal amount of light is extinguished elsewhere in this village.

Boggy: If we can somehow hinder the absorbtion of light, we should be able to weaken his influence and the dark emotions along with it...

Skell: This isn't going to be easy. He can call upon the darkness within each of our hearts at any time.

John: If only we had a keyblade...

Everyone stares in the direction of the Jinjonator's voice and crickets chirp off in the distance.

R Hunter: My eyes have adjusted slightly. How is everyone else faring?

Boggy: I can now make out shapes and movement. Let's be off to the Azure cave!

[Banjzooie]

BZ: Let's find the west road... Hmm... And I think that's what it says on this sign, "West road". The mayor said to go along it until we reach the river.

The group leaves town by the west road, and continues following it.

Shades: We've left town. Don't ya think that we should be uh, in da light now?

R Hunter: Darkness probably purposely made this road dark so we'd have a hard time finding him.

After a couple minutes, the group finds the river.

John: Now we have to go upstream.

Going upstream, the six travelers (plus Bob) come to a forest. They cautiously enter.

Skell: It'll be hard to follow the river through here; there's so many trees, half of which we don't see before bumping into them. It'll be easy to get lost, guys... Guys?

Skell finds himself lost in the middle of the forest.

Skell: Well, great. Now what do I do? I see the river, but it's thinner now. Almost as if...

And wherever BZ is in the forest...

BZ: Almost as if it's a branch of the main river. Interesting, huh R..? R? Great, I'm lost and alone.

Shades in his soul gem has also found himself lost in the dark forest.

Shades: You guys must be gettin' slow if I'm able t' stay ahead a you... Hey... Where are you guys?

No response.

Shades: ...Guys?! Where are you?

???: Grrr...

Shades: A low growl... Boggy, is that you?

A pair of eyes appear in the bushes.

Shades: Boggy, c'mere will ya?

???: Grrraaahhh?

Shades: Stop tryin' to scare me and c'mere.

???: RRRAAAAGGGH!!!

Shades: Are you deaf an' stupid? I said get yer butt over here!

The figure attached to the pair of eyes jumps out of the bushes and reveals itself to be... A puma!

Puma: RRRRRAAAAARRRR!!!

Shades: AAAAAAHHHH!!! Mommy!!!

Shades flies off in his soul gem, the puma in hot pursuit.
------------
Each character is lost in a seperate part of the forest, but each path has a branch of the river which can be followed upstream (except Shades' path). Once we all meet up at the end of the forest, we'll be at the entrance to Azure cave.

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Shades can fly?]
---
Boggy wanders slowly up the river, moving slowly and carefully and keeping to the bank by the sound of running water.

Boggy: Well... this sucks. Hey, wait... have I still got...

He rummages around in his pockets and pulls out the torch the mayor gave him.

Boggy: I really should have thought of this sooner.

He turns on the torch and shines it around the forest. To his disappointment, there is nothing of particular interest to see. Just trees, leaves and sticks covering the ground, the river gurgling away, a wolf ready to pounce, some ferns and brambles on the ground -

Boggy: Hang on!

He checks the area again with the torch. Just forest scenery.

Boggy: Hmmm.

Boggy looks around anxiously, suddenly aware of how cold it is. He hears a growl behind him and immediately proves that, despite his ample build, he can still run fast enough if required. After a full minute of flat-out sprinting, he slows to a halt and looks around. The wolf really is nowhere to be seen. The same goes for the river.

Boggy: Damn it.

[Banjzooie]

OOC: Seeing as how Shades is contained in a soul gem, there's no reason why he can't fly.

Edit: And, when I said he flew, I didn't mean flew as in flew into the sky and out of the forest. I meant that he was flying through the forest; as he's in a soul gem he always hovers above the ground so "running through the forest" simply wouldn't sound right.

[John]

[ooc: I have no idea what to put. O__O My mind is blank. I'll just start with the obvious "wandering through the forest alone" bit and see where it leads me.]
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Meanwhile the Jinjonator wanders through a twisting path in another part the forest.

John: Where does this path lead? I wonder what happened to all the others. I'm hungry.

He keeps walking and walking. Eventually he comes upon a worn down shack in the middle of a clearing.

John: Creepy... I wonder if anyone lives there. Maybe I could ask for directions.

He slowly walks up to the door and knocks. The door crumbles at his touch.

John: Anyone home? I'm coming in!

As he enters, he hears a noise. A clicking noise. It's faint at first, but it quickly grows louder as he get's nearer to the center of the shack and fills his heart with dread.

John: *gulp* Hello?

Soon he can see a faint glowing coming from the center of the shack. It's square in shape, and there is a blobbish black shape sitting in front of it. The clicking noise continues.

???: Who goest there!? Speakest thine name!

John: GAHHHHHHHHHH!

???: Stop the foul screaming! I'm trying to watch TV! Bah... Not that there's anything good on... Who's brain is so muddled up in the dark arts that they think up this devil's chatter!?

John: Huh?

???: Pshaw... Martha Stewart Incarcerated Living... Survivor: Black Hole... Isle o' Hagsrian Idol... Ebaumsworld TV... Damned sattelite package. 5000 channels and nothing decent for mine eyes to feast upon! Allst I can do is sit here clicking the buttons!

The TV turns off and the clicking stops. Someone gets off the black shape--obviously a chair--- and heads toward the Jinjonator.

???: Well ye've got my attention now! What do ye want with the olden forest hag Guffalla!

John: Wha! A witch?

Guffalla: Well I sure ain't a tooth fairy! Hurry it up will ya?

John: I am John the Jinjonator. Me and my friends were on our way through this here forest to find the Azure cave so that we can face the darkness elemental, but we got separated along the way and I have no idea where I am.

Guffalla: Ah... That lot. I've heard the tales from olden times... I know all about the ancient legends of the doomsday angel. I shall set us up a barrier so that we can get some light in here... Frallacrama Blam Glow!

A small sphere of light surrounds them. The "olden hag" is revealed to be a beautiful woman with shiny black hair, greenish skin, and curves in all the right places.

Guffalla: Pick your jaw up off the floor there!

John: Erm... Sorry. Well, can you point me in the direction of the Azure cave?

Guffalla: Better than that! I can lead ye there. I've been so bored lately you see... No children hath wanderest into the forest for me to snacketh on...

John: Eek!

Guffalla: A joke jinjo... Let's be off to ye olde Cave of Azure. A perilous journey liest ahead! KAHAHAHAHA HEEEHEEE!

And so they set off. Is this witch a friendly guide or will she lead the Jinjonator down a deadly path of doooooooom? Tune in next week! Same bat time, same bat channel!
----------------------------------
[ooc: O__O Obligatory forest witch. Why is her house not made of gingerbread and candy!?]

[Upsilon]

[ooc: I assumed that the Soul Gem was inanimate. Never mind.]
---
Boggy waves the torch around to no real end and wonders whether to shout for help, in case friends are nearby, or keep quiet, in case people who want to kill him are nearby. He decides the latter is a more sensible option. He continues to walk around without making any noise. Suddenly, he inadvertently makes a very loud one.

Boggy: Aaaaaaaaagh - oof.

Boggy looks up at the hole he fell through. He can see some light shining in from the forest, which just goes to show how dark his current environment is.

Boggy: What the bloody hell is a bloody hole doing in the bloody ground? Where am I, anyway?

The ground is made of stone, and when he takes a couple of steps in a random direction, he finds out that the wall is too.

Boggy: The cave? Where's my torch?

There is a pause while he blindly pats all the floor in a five-yard radius. He fails to find anything even vaguely luminous.

Boggy: I hate this quest.

He stumbles off into the darkness.

[Banjzooie]

Banjzooie wanders through the forest for a while with nothing really eventful happening. Eventually, he reaches a sphinx.

Banjzooie: Ooh... I sense Harry Potter rip-off coming on... I have to solve your riddle to get past, don't I?

Sphinx: Correct. My riddle is as follows... "One man holds a colorful flag and leads, many following in his wake. Some, however, prefer to take the path lined with trees from which hang blue fruits. But I am the one that follows neither. I am one of the many penguins. We make our own path. What does the leader holding the flag, with his many followers, represent? What do those who choose to live among the blue fruits represent? And, most importantly, what do I represent?"

BZ: How am I supposed to get this...
------------
I thought this riddle up all by myself. I want to see whether anyone can get it.

Edit: All right, I'm not seeing anyone get this, so I'll post the answer.
------------
BZ: This riddle makes no sense at all... No one could solve a riddle like this. I wish I was Bill Gates, so I could pay the Sphinx to let me through... Hang on... I've got it! *to sphinx* The man with the flag is Bill Gates, holding up the trademark Windows flag. Almost everyone uses Windows, including myself. The people who choose to live among the blue fruits... The blue fruits are apples. These are people who choose Apple's Macintosh OS over Windows. The penguin, that's the symbol of Linux. The people who choose Linux often help make it.

Sphinx: Correct. You may pass.

BZ walks through, following upstream. He waits until out of earshot of the sphinx to say what's on his mind.

BZ: Since when have sphinxes known anything about computers?

Since I came around.

BZ: Ah, shaddu--AAAAAARRRRGGGGHHH!!!

BZ falls into a hole!

BZ: You did that on purpose...

BZ gets up and looks around.

BZ: Can't see anything...

BZ feels around and finds a rock hard wall.

BZ: I'm apparently in some sort of cave...

BZ walks blindly forward, feeling the wall with one wing as he goes, and holding the other out in front of him. For a minute that wing feels nothing but air, but eventually touches something large, furry... And alive!

BZ: B-b-b-Bob... Light, please...

The chao illuminates the area and BZ sees a hulking polar bear in front of him!

BZ and Boggy: AAAAAAAHHHH!!!

BZ and Boggy run opposite directions, scared out of their wits by each other. After about ten seconds both screech to a halt, and slowly walk back to where they met.

BZ: ...Boggy? Is that you?

Boggy: BZ? What are you doing here?

BZ: I could ask you the same question.

Boggy: I just sorta fell in here.

BZ: Same here. What is this place?

Boggy: It's the Azure Cave!

BZ: I should've guessed as much... Any of the others find their way here yet?

Boggy: No, at least I don't think so...

A blood-curdling scream erupts just above them, outside the cave.

BZ and Boggy: What the heck?!

A soul gem zooms into the cave, right past BZ and Boggy.

Boggy: Shades?

Shades: Run for your lives!!!

BZ: What's he so scared of?

At that moment BZ's question is answered as the puma leaps into the cave. BZ and Boggy are too frightened to even scream, and simply run as fast as their legs will carry them.

[ralfsmith]

Oh its very interesting. Could you provide me more information ?

johntvery@operamail.com

johntvery@hotmail.com

[repobanjo]

I totally forgot about htis RP! I was supposed to sign up, rihgt? I can't be bothered to read the whoel thing, so can someone summarize this for me? I'll post a segment wiht as much knowledge as I have.

Reaper

Age: 200,000
Gender: Male
Weapon: Scythe
Backstory: A Grim Reaper who was once trapped in the body of an evil one. Excorcised by Klungo, along with his hippie brother Retpo, he is on a never-ending quest to kill his brother, Reapo.

A bright flash crossed the whole dimension. Nobdoy knew this, but it was Reapo, the dimension-hopping, time-traveling grim Reaper.

Reaper: I gott get used to falling from the sky.....Geronimo! U-oh. I'm gonna fall into a cave!

Boggy and BZ are being chased by the puma. This seems to be bad.

BZ: Man, I wish something falls on.....oh.

Boggy: What?

BZ: It seems to be my time-traveling dimension-hopping friend, Reapo.

Reaper: Where? I wanna murder that jerk!

BZ: Ummm....aren't you Reapo (this is all of the multiple personalities, am I right?)

Reaper: NO! He's the evil one, and....wait. If I said the words, "Jack Thompsons Adventure", would that strike a bell in your mind?

BZ: Sorry, but no.

Reaper: I'm so sorry. Well, let me explain. In a coule of RPs, you will see Reapo again. He is evil, so watch out. He has a good person inside him, as well as a normal person. You capture him, and take me and the hippie out of his mind. I am on a quest to kill Reapo!

BZ: Likley stroy. How am I to belive this?

Reaper: Whatever. You'll find out soon. I'm Reaper, a grim Reaper on a quest to kill Reapo.

BZ: Wait! If you're story is correct, wouldn't he still be a good guy in this time period?

Reaper: Well, I'm gonna kill him before he becomes evil.

BZ: Wouldn't that kill yourself?

Reaper: Oh yeah.....well. I'll just help you while I'm waiting for the dimension seeker finds Reapo. What are you searching for?

Boggy: We're searching for.....RUN!

At that moment, the puma wakes up, and starts to chase the three.

[R Hunter]

Like with B98's RP I have no ideas at the moment. This will hold my place until I do, which should (hopefully) be tomorrow at the latest.

Edit: No John that post was fine. Anyway here it is finally. I've got this bad case of writers block going on... :no:

R's trip through the forest has been just as bad as everyone else's. With one exception, no one had to do any fighting in thier areas....

R: Hah!...Yah! YAH!

His forested area is full of shadows. Of enemies he's fought, evils he's helped to stop and a few dark souls just angry someone living is intruding in thier forest. Currently R is facing off against images of his inner evil Malice and LBE. Both surround him and slash at him with claws that leak dark energy.
R jumps back and lets the two slash each other, before he does the same, making the two vanish. He takes a few deep breaths and runs off, trying to find the others. However he meets more faces from his past, Shade the chemeleon, Agony and S.Omega. along with the forest's own dark spirts, all awoken by the power of darkness. Along the way he hears the screams of Boggy and BZ when they meet, the angry mob, and a low haunting laugh...

R:...I have little to no time for this.

R finally comes to a barrier of blackness in front of him. He slashes it and it breaks, allowing him to make it to Azure Cave, even darker then the forest...

R:...The shadows lit up the woods a little...

John: R? Is that you?

R: Yeah John. Who's here?

John: Me, a witch I met, Shades and a large feral cat.

R:...I would have liked to be informed of THAT before I stepped in here.

Puma: Grrrrrrr...* (*Buffet today. My luck's turning around!)

[Banjzooie]

BZ: It seems to be my time-traveling dimension-hopping friend, Reapo.

Reaper: Where? I wanna murder that jerk!

BZ: Ummm....aren't you Reapo (this is all of the multiple personalities, am I right?)

Reaper: NO! He's the evil one, and....wait. If I said the words, "Jack Thompsons Adventure", would that strike a bell in your mind?


Um, Reapo, this RP is way before B98's RP. This is only a season after JQ. BZ doesn't know about the multiple personalities yet.

[Upsilon]

ooc: Okay, a summary as brief as I can make it. A few years ago, Boggy and friends went on an adventure which culminated in them killing the evil Mildred Ice Cube. Now, two icicle conspirators, Hiver (the dominant one) and Blain (the subservient one), are trying to gather all the shards of Mildred's body, of which 60 exist. They're trying to rebuild her body to use as a channel for an apocalyptic spirit who will then destroy the world in Mildred's body, thus avenging her death. To do this, they need at least three-quarters of the shards, but they're having trouble tracking them down. This means Boggy and co have to find and destroy 16 shards - they currently have 7, if I recall correctly. They've found a new world in the sky, called the Mystic Kingdom, which consists of ten villages, each plagued by a different elemental spirit. We've despatched the elementals of lightning, ice and time so far. The adventurers are Boggy, John, R Hunter, Banjzooie, Skell and now Reaper. They are accompanied by Shades, an unscrupulous mole who was killed by Hiver and whose soul is now contained in a soul gem and is out for revenge. Oh, also, a certain pirate is helping Hiver and Blain to collect shards, but we haven't seen much of him yet. Right now, the group is looking for the elemental of darkness.

[repobanjo]

Um, Reapo, this RP is way before B98's RP. This is only a season after JQ. BZ doesn't know about the multiple personalities yet.

He does not. I was adding that as a narrative. He was not saying that, the narrarator was. It was kind of confusing, though.

Oh, and thanks for the summary. I needed that.

[John]

Edit: >_< Sorry R Hunter. I somehow overlooked the post where you said were holding your place, and I continued. :( If my post ruins whatever ideas you came up with, just say so, and I'll delete it.

Welcome Repo! It's always good to see more people joining!

[ooc: Oh my. I'm at a loss of what to do with this witch I've introduced now. O_O Well... here goes nothing.]
---------------------------------------------------------------
The Jinjonator continues through the dark forest, with a brightly lit Guffalla leading the way.

Guffalla: We shall be getting close to the lair of darkness! Prepare thyself!

John: Why do you have to speak like that?

Guffalla: Rather I should speak like Yoda, you prefer? Hmmm... Yes.

John: Erm... no...

Guffalla: Then how about in rhyme! Or I could try to mime...

She begins feeling around as if inside an invisible box.

John: How about you just speak normally...

Guffalla: ...Some people just can't appreciate the artistic diversity of language! Hrmph!

They continue forth, but not before the Jinjonator crashes straight into the invisible box.

John: OWWWWWWW! That was totally uncalled for! I am completey outraged at this! Your mime was a complete and total fake! FRAUD!

Not long after this rather transparent plot development, Guffalla's light barrier flickers out and dies.

Guffalla: Dammit... cheap store brand light barriers..

John: Hey! I can hear something coming up behind us! If I'm not mistaken it sounds like a rather large and angry mob!

Angry Mob: Burn the witch!

Guffalla: Meh... They come around every night at this time. Bunch of fiflthy racists! Just because of my green skin. *sob* Is being different such a crime?

John: Right... I'm sure the fact that your brand of witchcraft involves dark arts and black magic has absolutely nothing to do with it.

Guffalla: Oh come on... A few hexes never hurt anyone! ...much... ...and it's not like their virgin daughters actually needed all their blood anyway! People need to be more open minded about other cultures and traditions! Lousy bigots! Besides... I think those maidens lied about their chastity... The youth potion worked like a charm, but now I have this wicked itch...

John: Whoa there! Way more information than I wanted to know! Lets just escape this mob and find the Azure cave.

They see the mob moving through the darkness towards them led by a priestly looking fellow in robes.

Priest: Onward fellow brothers in organized opressive religion! We must show our eternally forgiving love by purifying this witch by fire! Or drowning! Or hanging! Or military grade bazookas! Teehee! And I think we should wash clean that evil bird looking thing with her! It must be the witches familiar! ...hmmm. Might need nukular WMD's for that'un. Or Anthrax.

Angry Mob: AMEN! CLEANSE THE INFIDELS!

John: Hey, wait a second!

Guffalla: Aw, just ignore 'em.

It is at this very moment that the witches light barrier flicker's back on. The angry mob jumps back in shock covering their darkness adjusted eyes. The priest however is staring at Guffalla and drooling uncontrollably.

Priest: HOLY HALLELUJA! I have seen the LIGHT, and Me Almighty it is GOOD! Change of plans my flock of eventual sacrifices! I shall now be purifying the witches sinfully curvacious body with my rotundly holy body of burning passion! ROWRRRR!! Time for some heavenly creation of the PRO kind! Grab the camera! ...oh yeah... and the Nukes for the other one. Tsk. Tsk. Pity he's not a 12 year old altar boy.

Angry Mob: Aye, aye, Captain! PRAISE BE TO YEVON!

Guffalla: ...on second thought, let's get the frick out of here.

John: Agreed...

They begin running as fast as they can.

Guffalla: Where is the ESRB when you actually need them!? Heck! I'd even take Jack Thompson right about now! *gag*

John: Now you're just speaking crazy talk! QUICK! They're gaining! Who would of thought that a mob of middle aged cultist freaks could run so fast!

Begin commercial

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End commercial

Guffalla: And that, children, is what I hate about television.

All of a sudden the Jinjonator remembers his new time powers and speeds the two of them up. Faster and faster and faster they run! The legends say that they exceeded warp 9... and that they found a bloody hook stuck in the car door... and microwaved a poodle.

Indeed! They ran so fast that they didn't even notice that big gaping hole in the ground leading to none other than the Azure Cave! The witches bargain light barrier is snuffed out permanently.

John and Guffalla: AHHHHHHHHHHH! WEEEEEEEEE'RE FALLLLLLLLLLING!

*THUD*

Guffalla: Good thing this vicious animal cat thing broke our fall!

Puma: I swear... What are the odds. Today has just been a ridiculously crap day for me.

The Jinjonator looks over.

John: Oh! Hi guys!

Puma: GRRRRRR!

Guffalla: Ermm... Yikes!

John: Um... Shades?

Shades: Yeah?

John: Is there any particular reason why you haven't possessed the vicious animal cat thing and stopped it from trying to kill everybody?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
[ooc: Yeah... I think my brain imploded or something. >__<

Also, what are we going to do about Skell's journey to the cave? It doesn't look like Minjo is returning...]

[Banjzooie]

I'll handle Skell's journey to the cave when I get home from school today.

[Upsilon]

[ooc: I've just realised the subtle pun in Shades' name - 'shades' meaning dark glasses and 'shade' meaning a disembodied spirit. Heh.]
---
By now, pretty much everybody has reunited. Boggy, Shades, John, R, Reapo and Banjzooie (and Bob) are together in the cave, along with a snarling puma.

John: Um... Shades?

Shades: Oh, fine. I have to do everything for you corporeal cretins...

The faint light of the soul gem goes out, leaving them in total blackness. The panther rears up, then freezes for a couple of seconds and then drops onto all fours again. Shades takes a few steps and swishes his tail experimentally.

Shades: Hmm, not bad. I could get used to this.

R: Now, we'll need some light. Boggy, the torch, please.

Boggy: Ah. Well, about that...

The chao on Banjzooie's shoulder illuminates.

Boggy: Yeah. Just... just what we need.

The group look around the cave. There is a small stream trickling along the ground and a few forlorn stalactites hanging from the ceiling. Apart from that, the caves are largely featureless.

Banjzooie: Do we go down or up?

John: We should wait for Skell.

The adventurers begin their wait. After a while, Boggy starts to whistle.

R: Oh, shut up.

Boggy: Sorry. What's keeping Skell?

[John]

[ooc: I'm just going to post some filler stuff while we wait for Skell so that this doesn't die]
--------------------------------------
The group sits around the illuminating chao waiting for their comrade.

John: Why don't we play cards while we wait?

Boggy: Um... I don't think it's likely that anyone here has any cards.

Guffalla: I do! I used to go out and do card tricks to earn a little money. Also shell tricks. Oh... And I can also give hokey fortunes.

Guffalla pulls out a deck of cards and 3 shells.

R Hunter: What exactly are you still doing here anyway?

Banjzooie: Yeah. Weren't you just a plot device that the Jinjonator used to get to the cave?

Guffalla: Um...

Shaduma: I say we off her. She knows a bit too much, and I dun trust her. Anyone got a conveniently falling house or some dihydrogen monoxide?

John: There's a bunch of it in the stream! I'm going to go have a drink. I'm thirsty.

Guffalla: Bah... It's just a myth that water melts witches. How would I be able to take long showers and smell so nice otherwise?

Reaper: She does smell rather nice.

Boggy: We're getting too far off of the subject. What exactly are we going to do with her?

Shaduma: Yeah! It's common knowledge that witches are evil! We need somethin' else to off her with! How about a wooden stake!

Boggy: That's vampires.

Shaduma: Silver bullet?

Reaper: Werewolves...

Shaduma: Spiky club made of candy?

R Hunter: Mutant orphans...

John: I've finished a witch or two in the past!

Shaduma: Ya! We all know what happened to the witch that the big bad Jinjo man offed! Eva' hear of a game called Banjo-Tooie?

Guffalla: You're all as racist as that angry mob!

Banjzooie: I don't think we should kill anyone! There has to be another way!

They all continue arguing as they wait for Skell.

Guffalla: I forsee that we will be here for a long time.

[Banjzooie]

Oops, sorry, forgot I was supposed to manage Skell. Sorry guys...

Skell wanders through the forest for a while.

???: Grrrr...

Skell: Eh? Who's there?

A green dog (probably owned by Guffala) steps out of the bushes.

Skell: N-...Nice doggy...

Dog: Grrr--Ruh?

The dog walks up to Skell and sniffs him. After doing this for about ten seconds, the dog grabs one of Skell's boney legs in its teeth, and yanks it off of Skell, who falls to the ground as the dog trots off happily.

Skell: Lovely... Dogs and their bones... I'll never understand.

Skell is forced to wander through the rest of the maze using a couple of fallen branches as crutches. He keeps going for a while, until suddenly he doesn't feel any ground under him.

Skell: Eh? Why can't I feel any ground underneath me?

Skell looks down and realizes he's standing on thin air over a pit.

Skell: ...Darn it, this is like some corny cartoon joke. AAAAAHHHH!!! *Falls into the pit* Now I have to find some way out of... Boggy? BZ? R? John? What are you guys doing here?

Shaduma: Oh there you are, Skell. We was wonderin' where you were.

Skell: ...YAAARRRGGGHHH!!! PUMA!!!

Shaduma: Woah woah woah, calm down, don't ya recognize my voice, or is your skull that thick? Get it, "is your skull that..." Okay, so that wasn't funny. A rather bad pun.

Skell: ...Shades? I'd kick you for scaring me out of my wits, but seeing as how I can't stand with only one leg...

John: What happened to your leg?

Skell: Stupid dog mistook it for a common bone.

Bob: You're not the only one missing something...

Skell: ...Eh? Where's that halo you usually wear?

Guffala: Under one of these three shells. If he can't find where I've hidden it, I get to keep it!

R Hunter: I think it's under... That one. Points to the left.

Guffala: And that is... *lifts shell, revealing the halo* ...Right?! Hey, how did you know where it was? I moved it by magic!

R Hunter: I know some spells myself. Even some ancient ones, probably because my original incarnation lived some millenia ago. Simple spells like yours aren't going to fool me. *takes halo* Here, Bob.

The chao takes back his halo and sets it hovering over his head. It becomes a heart for a couple seconds.

Bob: Thanks. Without it I can't express myself very easily.

R Hunter: No problem. Now that we're all here in Azure Cave...

Skell: ...This is Azure Cave?

R Hunter: Yep. As I was saying, now that we're all here, we should get moving.

[repobanjo]

Yay! We can now finally continue!

Skell is finally here. They all get going, like the last segment said.

Reaper: WAIT! I have been waiting here for Skell?

Skell: Reapo? Is that you? SCHWEET!

Reaper: NO! I am Reaper, the brother of Reapo. Listen, in the fututre, my brother, Reapo will turn evil. I become good. DO NOT KILL HIM YET! I am in his body. Wait until I leave his body. Then is the time to strike.

Skell: Likley story. Like I'll ever belive that.

Reaper: *grumble* Let's just get that stupid elemental....thingy. What elemental were you guys on before I came?

All: Darkness.

Reaper: I see.....hey! Look, a green dog! Come here, little fella!

Reaper doesn't know this is the same dog that took Skell's leg. Being that Reaper is also made of bone, this ain't pretty.

Dog: *looks at Reaper's arm* Wow! That's a big bone. I'll just take that...

Skell: Wait, NO! *watches as Reaper's arm gets torn off. Well, at least we can get it back.

Reaper: Grim reaper bones aren't like skelletons. They are not supposed to come off!

BZ: Ewww. Find a replacment for now.

Reaper uses his scythe as a replacment.

R: Are we set to go?

All: Yeah!

R: Ol, let's go!
--------------------------------------------------

Note: I just used some filler, as I do not know what we are doing in the Azore Cave.

[Upsilon]

Boggy: Right then. The mayor said we had to go down, right?

The adventurers begin to advance slowly down the shallow incline.

John: I don't like this. Jinjos aren't cut out for caves.

Skell: Neither is hopping.

Reaper: I miss my elbow.

Banjzooie: And it's too cold.

R: Stop complaining, you lot. I think we must be nearly at the bottom. Look, the slope's flattening.

The group find themselves on level ground.

Shaduma: I can't see any elemental.

Guffala: Well, we can't go any further.

Boggy: You're right. If we do, we'll fall right down that chasm.

As one, they turn to look at the crevasse.

John: ...ah.

Banjzooie: What, down there?

[repobanjo]

The group is wondering what to do in this situation. Where will they go?

Skell: Well do we have any climbing equpment?

Boggy: I dunno. How deep is the crevice.

R: Well, by the sound of the pebble, maybe it goes about 7000 feet down.

Boggy: 0_o. Guffala, can we borrow something floating?

Guffala: Well, I could, but no! *cackle*.

Guffala flys down without them.

Boggy: Wow. This just might be the worst we got. Shaduma, how about you?

Shaduma: Puma's don't have apposable thumbs!

Boggy: I got an idea! Skell, jump! You can survive, we will just rebuild you when we get to the bottom.

Skell: You sure this is safe?

Boggy: Saftey Not Guaranteed:

Skell: Right, but I've only done this once before. PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT!

Reaper: Hey, I got my own weapon!

BZ: What's that gonna do?

Reaper: Well, this is a boomerang style. Someone climbs on, and I throw them down to the bottom. Then, I'll teleport down.

R: YOU CAN TELEPORT?

Reaper: Yeah, that's how I got to the past.

R: This isn't the past....

BZ: That's what we've been trying to tell him. Whatever. Throw us!

One by one, Reaper throws them down to the bottom and get his weapon back. Soon, it is his turn.

Reaper: Well, here it goes. *teleports*. Wait, I didn't go down! I'm just right above the crevice. Well, this is gonna hurt. *falls*

Meanwhile, down in the bottom.

R: What's taking "Reaper" sp long? Geez, this is stupid! Woah, we forgot about fixing Skell. How ya doing, buddy?

Skell: Just...fix me.......fast!

BZ: Yeah, you look kind of hurt.

Skell: KIND OF? THIS HURTS LIKE A MILLION GUNSHOTS!

Bz: Wow, you don't have to yell!

7 hours later.

Boggy: Well, we are finally done! Where's Reaper?

Shaduma: Does anyone else hear that sound? It's like, "EEEEEEE!"

Reaper: EEEEEEEEEEE!

Boggy: Yeah, I hear it too.

Just then, Reaper falls onto Skell, plowing him 40 feet undergorund along with him, and disconnecting both of them.

Skell: That's funny. I thought you said you could teleport.

REaper: Well, it borke. Sorry. Now, who's bones are who's?

Skell: I don't know. Guess we'll just have to guess.

R: GUYS! Are you OK?

Reaper: Couldn't feel worse.

Skell: Same.

Boggy: That's got to hurt. We'll get you out in a second.

What will happen next? Why did the segment creator get the group into such a tight situation? I don't know!

[Minjo]

People just make me die :(

I haven't had a chance to continue with the school exams, and the fact I was tantrummed with the RWP War...

[John]

OOC: I thought you were already dead, being a skeleton and all. Oh well, as you wish. I'll be sorry to see you go. :(
------------------------------------------
They work for about an hour and finish piecing together Reaper first. They are just beginning to attach Skell's bones together when they hear a noise from above.

Guffala: Look! Up there!

Boggy: It's more of those troublesome Biggafeet! They must still be following us!

Banjzooie: It looks like they're tossing something down!

A black package tied to a parachute begins descending towards the group. It is ticking mysteriously.

R Hunter: It sounds like a time bomb! As soon as it gets down here it will blow this cavern to bits and take us all with it!

Reaper: We have to get out of here! Quickly down the tunnel!

John: But what about Skell!? We can't get his pieces together quickly enough, and there is no way we have enough time to gather them all in the first place!

Boggy: The soul gem! We'll take his soul with us in that!

Banjzooie: It's nowhere to be found though!

Skell: It's alright. You guys go! I've been dead so long already... I want rest.

R Hunter: What are you saying!?

Skell: I'll use the last of my spiritual energy to surround the bomb and shield the explosion! I'll finally be able to rest in peace... It's for the fate of the world! Now get as far away from this area as you can!

John: *sniff* I'm no good at good byes.

Banjzooie: We'll never forget your sacrifice!

Shaduma: Down tha' tunnel! NOW!

Everyone except for Skell runs for the tunnel as fast as they can. After about two minutes of running they hear the loud boom of the explosion, and the shockwave knocks them all down.

Boggy: Lets get that Darkness Elemental and gather the rest of the shards! We can't let his sacrifice be in vain!

They continue on, the darkness surrounding them thicker than ever and dimming Bob's light. They are close to the showdown with Darkness itself.
-----------------------------------------
OOC: R.I.P. Minjo. I hope that was a satisfactory demise.

By the way, even though I've started the R.W.P. comic thing, I'm still planning to continue the drawings of this RPG when I have time. :)

[repobanjo]

Wow. I almost cried there. :(

[Upsilon]

Eventually, the chamber becomes so narrow that the group is forced to walk in single file. After a short argument and a lot of pushing, R ends up at the front, with Banjzooie directly behind him.

Boggy: Can you see anything?

R: No...

Boggy: What about now?

R: There's a right turn up ahead.

They follow the path around a convoluted twisty route for what seems like hours. Eventually, they emerge in a huge dome-like room. There are some cave paintings on the walls, and the ceiling is festooned with dripping stalactites.

Reaper: Fairly stereotypical, isn't it?

John: Look.

He points to an iron door at the other end of the cavern.

John: I guess darkness is through there?

The questers exchange nervous glances.

Banjzooie: So, who wants to go first?

Everyone looks at each other, then at the puma.

Shaduma: What? Look, you can't send me in there! I'm despicable, right? This darkness guy feeds off the darkness in your soul - I'd be like a buffet to him!

R: Well... you have a point.

Shaduma: Clearly, the one with the least darkness will have to go in first. The most virtuous, like.

There is a pause, while everyone thinks.

Boggy: I'm decidedly gluttonous. Look at all this fat!

John: I'm a very aggressive person.

Reaper: I take people's souls. I'm probably the darkest one here. Much as I'd like to...

Banjzooie: I think we can all agree that R is the most benign one here.

R: What?

Boggy: Oh, it's true. Courageous, moral, self-sacrificing...

John: You're a true hero, R!

R: It's not true! I have plenty of vices! For example -

Boggy: I've driven drunk!

John: I've destroyed small villages!

Reaper: I want to kill my own brother!

Banjzooie: I'm wanted for quadruple murder!

R: I secretly think you're a group of cowardly idiots!

Everyone stops and looks at R.

R: Well... not really.

Darkness: Oh, but it's true.

Everybody jumps and turns to look at the door, which has swung open. The figure who stands in the doorway is an obscene hybrid made up of the least appealing features of every adventurer standing there.

Darkness: That's exactly what you are. You're all cowards, and you're all idiots. Look at yourselves! You're playing right into my hands! Standing here, arguing about which of you is the most evil, trying to put each other in danger - can't you see that this is exactly the sort of thing that makes me strong? Honestly, professional adventurers like you - I'd expected better.

The adventurers are staring at the floor, avoiding each other's gaze and, more importantly, keeping their eyes away from Darkness.

Darkness: But I suppose people are all the same, aren't they? You might think you're a nice person, but underneath you're just cynical opportunists looking out for yourselves. Your skeleton friend might have died a noble death, but only because he was tired of living. Which of you could honestly say he would have made the same sacrifice?

Nobody dares to raise their hand.

Darkness: You all disgust me. But thank you. Through your combined efforts, you've made me stronger than I have ever been. Now, is there anyone here who will fight me?

Everyone looks at each other.

Darkness: I must advise you to be brave. The longer you are cowards, the stronger I will get.

Trying not to be reluctant about it, everyone nervously puts up their hand.

Darkness: Now that's more like it! Okay, polar bear, take your best shot at me. Come on! Punch me right in the face! Or maybe you can use your ice powers! Do what you will!

Trembling, Boggy takes a step forward. As he advances on the shadow, a voice fills his head.

Darkness: Remember all the times when you forgot, Boggy Bear? Your wife's birthday, your children's, parents' and siblings' birthdays, Valentine's Day, your anniversary? That's a hefty long list. You averaged 2.8 forgotten special days per year, as I recall. And then, all those times when you just couldn't be bothered, when you got them a present that you knew would disappoint them, but you didn't care, because you were too absorbed in your own comfort. Think about all the pain you caused them. Think about all the marriage vows you disobeyed. Do you deserve that widescreen TV, Boggy? Do you?

Boggy is collapsed on the ground in anguish. Darkness smiles maliciously.

Darkness: I had only scratched the surface. Now, does anyone else think they're good enough to face me?

Everyone looks down at Boggy, then at the ground.

Darkness: That's what I thought. Now get out of my sight.

The group dejectedly leave the cavern. It is several minutes before any of them speaks again.

R: We need a different strategy.

[repobanjo]

The group is in sorrow. Boggy is temporarily out of commision. They are a wreck. That is until BZ thinks of something.

BZ: I got it! Boggy, what did he do to you?

Boggy: *whisper*. He made me remember all of the bad things I did.

BZ: Exactly. We need someone so evil that he can not say all of the things evil about him. Besides, if he is that dark, he would'nt care.

R: Can't we just get someone so nice they don't have anything against them?

Shaduma: No such person exists. There is no one that has done nothing bad.

Bob: Besides, who can we find?

Reaper: Well, we could take my brother. He is so evil, they couldn't stop him!

R: Are you sure that's safe?

Reaper: I'm sure! Just wait a second.

REaper all of a sudden turns into lightning, and gets a bunch bruises.

BZ: Might I ask what happened? It's not raining, how did you get struck by lightning?

Reaper: Well, if you time travel, you can immedeatly come back to when you started TT. So, I went to the "future", confrotned Reapo for several hours, and came back.

Boggy: So, um.....did you get him?

Reaper: No. I got the next best thing, though. Here is Retpo. He lives as a hippie, and is totally neutreal. I don't think he has anything bad on him. Let's try.

Several hours later, back at camp.

Reaper: How was I supposed to know he smokes weed?

R: Let's just let this go. Who else can we get? I mean, we can get anyone from any time period with that invention. WAIT! We can get one of the elders! Those guys were creul.....

BZ: I'm still getting over that "game".

Boggy: From what I heard, those guys sound evil.

BZ: So, arte we going to get them??

All: YES!!!!

Reaper: So, who's gonna take the elder here? This thing can only teleport one person. Oh, and it has a stun gun built in. I'm not sure if it works on these "elders", though.

Who will go to take the elders? Come back soon!

[Upsilon]

[ooc: I know nothing whatsoever about these Elder people, yet I feel obliged to post something. And you know what that means! Warning: bold-heavy.]
---
Meanwhile, back in what Boggy is becoming increasingly fond of referring to as "the real world…

…to be specific, the Pine Grove on the Isle O' Hags…

…a renegade adventurer is doing just what he does best. He's hit a bit of a snag, though. The pirate looks around and frowns. He still isn't sure about working for those icicles – they weren't very specific about why they wanted these blessed ice shards, and he had been sure he could detect some villainy in the air surrounding them.

Still, the pirate yearned for adventure. He had always wanted to be a hero. That's why he'd entered the swashbuckling business in the first place. But then, just when he thought his time had come to shine, that damn bear had come along…

Which was why at the slightest hint of an opportunity to indulge in a collectionfest, or even a full-on quest, he clung to straws like this. It was pathetic, really. But he needed it. It was all that kept him alive.

Anyway.

Pirate: 'Ow did I miss that switch?

The pirate stares up into the Flume, shrugs and ascends the stairs to find out what undiscovered land lurks beyond…

[repobanjo]

The elders were a group of "gods" that ruled the land in TQ. They could basicaly crush anyone in a second if you aren't prepared.

[Banjzooie]

Reapo: So, how are we going to get an Elder?

The door swings open once again, and Darkness steps out.

Darkness: You really think that getting someone with more evil than average will hurt me? BZ, you're smarter than that. An idea not worthy of you. An Elder would only help me. The shame of this is that not one of you has the courage to face me, to face yourselves. BZ, you're just as bad as the rest.

BZ's mind suddenly reels back twenty years.

Darkness (to BZ only): You are possibly the most evil of them all. For twenty years you did the unthinkable and confined yourself for twenty years, all the time feeling sorry for yourself, and growing more and more angry at the world. And then, when the news about the SnS eggs and the Big Whoop got out, you tried the most dispicable plans you could think of to get all the SnS eggs for yourself. But you know what's the worst? Your "real" self abandoned that RPG for several pages and, though others would happily continue controlling your character, when you finally came back, you retconned the Nanoshape segment of the RPG to make it seem as though you escaped by yourself, rather than being rescued by R Hunter and Blue Breegull as they originally posted it. Trying to put all the glory on one's self is very, very evil.

BZ: ...But I... Recently... Accepted the original version of the story as the true one... I even said that in my... RWP Wiki entry...

Darkness (out loud now): That does not change what you did. Oh, and, another thing, what's this about being "wanted for quadruple murder"? You never committed quadruple murder. Lying is quite possibly the greatest sin of all. Not to mention how cowardly you were being... You, of all people, tried to send R Hunter to fight me, putting your best friend in danger! What kind of friend are you?! The kind that stabs in the back?! And after R Hunter has risked his life for you several times! I thought you were better than that... Clearly, I was wrong.

BZ collapses, and the ground is being flooded with his tears.

BZ: I don't deserve to live... Kill me...

Darkness: Gladly.

A ball of the blackest power forms in Darkness' hand.

R Hunter: If you take him... *steps in front of BZ* You take me, too.

Darkness: You would put yourself in his place? He betrayed you!

R Hunter: And I betrayed him. I also tried to come up with reasons why someone else should go, and, a couple RPs ago, my dark side attacked him several times! I'm just as bad as he is. I betrayed everyone when I let my dark side terrorize everyone, even though it was split from me. If anyone should go, it should be me. Not him.

Darkness: ...ARRRGGGHHH!!! *In pain*

Boggy: R Hunter... You didn't break marriage vows. And you couldn't control your dark side once it split from you. If anything, I should go. *steps in front of R Hunter.

Darkness: ...Unselfishness... Draining... Me... RRAAAARGGGHH!!!

The others come up with reasons that they should go and the others shouldn't, and eventually, all but Shades have stepped in front to protect their friends.

Darkness: Can't... Stand it...

Shaduma: Y'know what? I'm the most evil of them all. I joined this 'ere quest just to get my 'ands... Er... Paws... On a bit 'a loot. I've betrayed them more than anyone else. I should go! *stands in front of them all*

Darkness: ...How can you now all be so strong, after being cowardly just a few minutes ago... So much pain... No matter, I will still kill you!

Darkness gathers up the last of his strength, creating a ball of energy large enough to destroy them all.

BZ: ... They're all doing this... To protect us... To protect me... I... Can't... Let... Them... DIE!!!

Darkness releases a beam of energy, but not before BZ jumps in front of Shaduma. A shield forms behind BZ, the beam strikes him, and Darkness screams in agony! The group breaks through the shield in a last-ditch attempt to save BZ, and push him out of the way. Darkness screams even harder, if that is possible. The beam disperses and all of them fall, looking fried, but not dead.

BZ: Guys... I was... Trying to take the... Full blast so... You didn't have to take... Any of it!

Boggy: We're all... In this together... If one of us takes it, we all do.

R Hunter: Friends don't... Let friends die.

John: I believe that's what... You... Were trying to prove.

BZ: Yeah...

Shaduma: I'm new to this whole sacrifice thing, but doesn't sacrifice usually involve some poor bloke dying to save his friends? We're all alive!

R Hunter: *getting up* Well, we got BZ out of the way before he could take more than half the damage, and thus only took half of the damage ourselves. Darkness couldn't stand the all the sacrificing left and right.

Darkness: You... All of you. It takes great courage to sacrifice yourself for another. It takes even more to sacrifice yourself for someone who's trying to sacrifice himself for you. You have earned my respect!

Back in the village, the darkness lifts and the villagers shut their eyes as sunlight touches the village for the first time in a long time!

Darkness: You may return to the village. I will not bother it any longer.

The heroes all slap high-fives and walk back to the village. Upon entering town hall, however...

BZ: No! The mayor!

The mayor lies unconsious on the floor, and everything around him is torn up. Photographs lie on the floor. Boggy runs up to the mayor and slaps his face to try and wake him up.

Mayor: ...Ugh... Uh...?

Boggy: Mr. Mayor! Who did this?!

Mayor: P...Pirate... Shards... Gone... *faints*

John: Pirate? Now who do we know in Banjo-Kazooie world who's a...

They all look at each other, all having come to the same conclusion.

Bob: Geez, he even stole the ice shards, by the look of things!

R Hunter: We have to find Blackeye!

BZ: Yes, but, R Hunter, we've got to be careful. We've only seen Blackeye when he's been drunk, unless you count battling him when True Evil had him possessed back in the Banjo RPG! We don't know what he's really capable of! Not to mention I stole the Light Key and the fake Cyan Egg from him five years ago, so he won't be too happy with me.

Reaper: You stole two SnS items from him?

BZ: One of them was fake, but yes, I did steal them from him. I've long since used the Light Key, and the fake Cyan egg is of no use.

Reaper: Remember what his catch phrase is? "A bear stole me glory, looked a bit like you he did..." What if he didn't actually mean Banjo?

BZ: ...Oh snap. You mean when he says that he's referring to me?!

John: It sure looks that way.

BZ: ...Well, when Blackeye sees me, I'm in trouble, that's for sure.

R Hunter: He can't do much to kill you if all of us are together. Right now we need to figure out where he is, because he has the ice shards! And we need to figure out why he wants the ice shards, too!

The group begins forming ideas...
------------------
Reapo, I didn't mean to trash your plan, but technically the Elders are EnEnDar's characters. We can't go using them without asking him first.

[repobanjo]

Yeah, I guess that that was best left alone. Your idea was much better.

[John]

[ooc: Yay! So, I assume that Banjzooie is the one who was granted the power of darkness? That means that so far
R Hunter: Lightning
Boggy: Ice
John: Time
Banjzooie: Darkness]
----------------------------------
John: We need to ask around... Lets try that Tavern over there. The "Airy Avian" We know how much Blackeye loves a good drink.

The group enters the pub and head to the counter. An old woman is wiping glasses behind it.

Boggy: Excuse me. Have you seen a rather surly looking man of the sea around here muttering about glory?

Old Woman: Hrmmm... I should say so! He came a'stormin' in here orderin' me 'round! Then 'e walked orf withow' even payin' me! He were talkin' 'bout glory and shards and bears and heroics... Said 'e were off to the north 'e did.

Banjzooie: Really...

Woman: Said 'e smelt the musk o' the sea. Can't be true though... Up north is the Crackton Canyon and since theses 'ere islands be floatin' in the air, there ain't no seas anywhere!

R Hunter: Thanks for that...

They exit the Tavern and head down the cobbled streets.

Boggy: It sounds like the water elemental has been at work up north. Blackeye must be off to get at the shards from that village.

Shaduma: I guess we shoulds be of findin' another of those transporter things...

Repo: Lets head to the edge of this island.

Guffalla: Something in my memory about the ancient Doomsday Angel is bothering me. A verse in the legends... they say...

When the one with shadowed eye,
Seeks stupendous splendor...
Then the threat will breathe nearby,
And dread destruction shall be rendered...

John: Oh! That's right! You said you knew all about the ancient Doomsday legends when we first met...

Repo: I don't like the sound of that at all.

Guffalla: I have much to mull over. Your destiny is cloudy. I cannot see it now. If only I hadn't lost Dingpot so long ago, I could channel this more easily...

John: Dingpot? You mean Gruntilda's cauldron?

Guffalla: WHAT!? Gruntilda!? That thieving wench! I should have known!

Banjzooie: You knew each other?

Guffalla: We were bitter rivals in witch school... We were constantly trying to one up the other one in magic. Last I saw her years ago, we were competing over who was the most beautiful! Haha! I showed her! My potion made me more beautiful than anyone! KAHAHAHAHA! I wonder where her pitiful efforts ended up...

John: Oh... They ended up in the gutter. She made the mistake of trying to steal it from Banjo's sister.

Guffalla: KEEHEE! *ahem* Sorry about that. Anyways... You should get back to chasing that Blackeye fellow. You must gather the shards! That is your destiny! That much is clear.

Boggy: You don't have to tell us that.

John: Let's go!

They reach the North edge of the island, and the familiar glow of the teleportation runes greet them.

[Banjzooie]

OOC: Oops... I forgot that someone was supposed to get Darkness' power. Um... I can't think of what exactly that power should be though. Should it be making people feel guilty for evils as Darkness did, or something different?

[R Hunter]

Think of it in terms of the element itself. It can corrpt life, block out light, things of that nature.

[repobanjo]

R: Come on, let's go!

BZ: Yeah, if we don't, the watre element might do something back to the Crackton Canyon.

Reaper: Well, I don't trust this teleportation device. I never used it before, and I sure don't lknow how it works. I'll use my own. Tally ho! *transports*

Boggy: Well, we are going to Crackton Canyon, or what?

The group teleports to Crackton Canyon, where they see REaper helping a couple of natives.

John: What happened?

Reaper: The water elemntal has flooded this place with sea water and took all of the fresh water!

R: Oooh, that must suck.

BZ: It sure looks like it.

Boggy: Well, we should find out where the Water Element and Captain Balckeye went! Excuse me, sir, have you seen a surly, drunk captain and a watery creature somwhere around here?

Man:.......Captain........went to.......WATER!.........water creature......at top of......mountain.....*dead*

BZ: Wow. These guys really need to drink something.

Reaper: Not to spoil the moment, but what was that dark ball that went into your body, BZ? (I don't understand the concept of these powers. Are we allowed to use them whenever?)

BZ: Well, here is how it works...........
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Yeah, that was short.

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Okay, I'll bite... :p
Repo: Yeah, I think the powers can be used anywhere. They should be used sparingly, though.
Incidentally, how many shards are we on? It's 8, right?]
---
Banjzooie: From what I can make out, I can compel people to do evil. They have to be strong to resist.

Boggy: Hmm. I can see that one coming in handy.

Banjzooie: Shut up!

John smacks Boggy.

John: Wait, wha - hey!

Banjzooie: Couldn't resist. But I also have more literal dark powers. Watch.

Banjzooie concentrates and the surrounding area dims slightly.

Banjzooie: Well, it'll get better with practice.

Boggy: Seems rather pointless to m - agh! What's happened? I can't see!

Banjzooie: Yeah, I can also do that.

Banjzooie smirks as Boggy flails blindly at him.

Banjzooie: Anyway, we should be getting to this mountain, right?

When Boggy's sight has been grudgingly returned, the group sets off.

Reaper: So is there a lake on this mountain or what? I can't believe that we'll meet the water elemental without encountering any water.

R: I think a more pressing concern is Captain Blackeye.

As if summoned, a voice wafts over to them from the foot of the mountain.

Blackeye: Ahoy there!

A figure can barely be seen standing at the mountain's edge, waving at them.

John: What do we do? What do we do?

R: He hasn't met us before. He might not wish us any ill.

Boggy: Do you suppose?

R: I do. We don't even know what he wants the shards for. I think we should try and co-operate with him.

Banjzooie: And what is he's malign?

Reaper: We have the powers of ice, lightning, time and darkness at our disposal, right? I'd like to think that would get us past some crusty old failed buccaneer.

With that in mind, the adventurers cautiously march to the mountain to meet with Blackeye.

[repobanjo]

As they reach Blackeye, they get more and more worried.

Blackeye: Ahoy! *smacks everyone* Did you really think I was good? No. This segment is very predictable, and will continue to do so!

Boggy: Great. You just broke the fourth wall! Quick, Reaper! You are the segment creator, so do something unredicting!

Reaper: Saying that will just make it predictable....but whatever.

All of a sudden, exactly 2001 1/2 magos fell from the mountains and felll upwards onto the heros. This cause a hole in the space-time continuum and made everyone colorblind except R Hunter.

Reaper: Happy now?

BZ: NO! You just made me covered in magos and color-blind! Just let me do this! *controls the group to hit Blackeye*

Blackeye: Aye, this be strange! I'm blind!

Boggy: come on, we can push him off, right now if we hurry.

They puch Blackeye onto a trampoline, which bounces him back up to the platform.

All: Well, that was unpredictable.

Reaper: Of course it was! I'm writing it.

John: Just get rid of the trampoline.

Reaper: Fine.....*erases*.

John: So, let's push him off again!

Before they could do anything, the water element took Blackeye.

Hydra: I wouldn't want you to hurt my poor minion, so I'll protect him for now.....

BZ: He's your minion?

Hydra: Of course! He's too stupid to be a real bad guy, so I had to take control. Now, if you lost to me, I will be allowed to suck the water from Crackton Canyon dry!

Boggy: Fine. We accept.

Hydra: Now, which one of you will challenge me?

Who will challenge him? Find out next time!

Boggy: First, I'll just have to do this....Reaper, can you draw me a memory beam?

Reaper: Sure.

Boggy: Let's all forget we can change what we are writing, OK? *zap* What's this gun? *tosses away*.

-----------------------------------------------------------

I had writers block, so I needed to break the fourth wall.

[Upsilon]

[ooc: Hey, where did everybody go? *slaps self*]
---
Reaper: Well, I suppose I should be the one to challenge this water thing. I'm the only one of us without a cooly power.

Banjzooie: Quite aside from your mastery of space, time and the human soul.

Reaper: Yeah, but I can't throw snowballs at people, can I?

Boggy: Shut up.

Hydra: Fact is, it isn't that simple. Before you can face me, you must bring me a gift.

R: Why?

Hydra: Because I bloody well say so, that's why. I saw how long Darkness took you - I don't want to be some pushover who's over in five posts.

Boggy: In what?

Hydra: Oh, just an idiomatic expression. The point is, I want you to bring me a gift. Each.

Blackeye: Yarr! Each!

Hydra: Shut up, you.

Banjzooie: These gifts... are they anything specific, or can they be anything?

Hydra: Oh, I've prepared a list.

Hydra hands over a list of items, each annotated with one of the adventurers' names.

Hydra: These won't be easy to find, I can assure you. I'll return to the top of the mountain until all five items are brought here.

With that, the water elemental disappears in a cloud of bubbles.

Blackeye: Arr... what be I supposed to do?

There is no response.

Blackeye: Well, I suppose I'll just be waitin' 'ere, then... avast...

The adventurers tear the list into five, leave the despondent pirate sitting at the bottom of the mountain and set off to find their presents.

[Banjzooie]

The group splits up, and BZ walks off, reading the list...

BZ: Now what do we have here... Hmm... 1... A super-size burrito... 2... A water-proof Nintendo DS... 3.......Every season of The Simpsons on DVD?! What have I gotten myself into?!... A burrito'll be easy to get, but a water-proof Nintendo DS? I'd have to pay like a $1,000,000 to Nintendo to get one of those made... As for the Simpsons, not every season has even been released on DVD yet! Why am I bothering going through all the trouble to get this stuff anyhow? Maybe I should just ditch this stupid quest and leave the others too--

BZ's loyal chao slaps him in the face.

Bob: What is wrong with you?! Ever since you got Darkness' power, You've been acting selfish!

BZ: Oh well, can't worry about it. Off to Taco Bell!

After a short trip to Taco Bell, in which BZ buys a super-size burrito, he returns to Hydra, the bag in hand.

Hydra: Oooohh... Lunch.

Hydra launches squidlike tentacles out from his body. BZ recoils, but the tentacles only take the Taco Bell bag. He swallows the whole burrito in one gulp.

Hydra: Now, *burp* get going and find me the other two items!

BZ: ...Yeah yeah, whatever. Hmm... To get a specially-made waterproof Nintendo DS, I'm going to have to travel to Nintendo's HQ. That means going into the real world...

Hydra: The fourth wall has seen better days... *Burp*

BZ: Shaddap.

BZ pulls a remote out of his backpack. He presses a button, and his black-and-yellow clad Arwing appears in a flash of light. BZ hops inside and sets the trans-dimensional coordinates.

BZ: Falco is still jealous that my Arwing can travel through hyperspace, and his can't. But who can blame him?

Bob: Why are you bragging about that all of a sudden? BZ, this isn't like you!

BZ: Do I look like I care?

With those words, the Master Sword on BZ's back loses some of its glimmer, and looks slightly rusted.

BZ: Now, off we go.

The Arwing's hover jets take it off the ground, and the main engines kick in, propelling the ship farther and farther away from the planet's surface. In a brilliant flash of light, the Arwing vanishes as quickly as it came.
-----------------
Will BZ be able to persuade the head of Nintendo to do the impossible, and design a water-proof Nintendo DS? Furthermore, how will he pay for it? And why is he suddenly seeming somewhat evil? As if you didn't know? Find out next time!

[repobanjo]

Reaper: Let's see what I have. 1...A super-sized soda from McDonalds... 2...Cyberspace (?)... 3...The E.T Atari cartridge.

As soon as he read the last two, Reaper was dumbfounded.

Reaper: Well, soda is easy, but CYBERSPACE? Geez, how am gonna get that. Also, I think that Atari buried all of the ET Atari games in a desert! This is gonna take a while. Now to get the soda......

One trip to McDonalds and 4,000 calories later.

Reaper: Now, to start my (hopless) trip to cyber space to steal is. I do need that water power, though.

Reaper teleported away to some place. Yep, how can you teleport to a place that doesn't exist?

[Upsilon]

[ooc: This topic won't die, not if I can help it!]
-------
Boggy: Right. Let's see here... a Big Al burger. Simple enough, I'd think...

Once Boggy has been to Witchyworld to pick up the fast food, he checks the next item on the list.

Boggy: A jar of snow from Freezeezy Peak? Who came up with this nonsense?

Irritably, Boggy treks to Freezeezy Peak, realises he doesn't have a jar, goes home to find one, goes back to Freezeezy Peak and scoops up a jar of snow.

Boggy: But how can I keep it cold? Ah...

Boggy, whose legs are becoming tired, returns home to get the thermos, realises the snow has melted, throws the jar on the floor in annoyance, then looks for another jar.

Boggy: Damn it...

[repobanjo]

Gahh...I finsihed a long segment and got logged out. I'll paraphrase it.

Reaper: How am I gonna get CYBERSPACE?!?!?! I need a walk....

Reaper stubles into FP, and feels like veing nasty. He urinates his name and location on some snow and teleports it right to Boggy's house. That'll teach him.

Reaper: Why am I being nasty? That's not me.....wah. I gotta get cyber space! Let me think....space....space...sapceBAR! I GOT IT!

Reaper finds cyberspace and rushes off to Hydra to give it. How he got cybersapce? You'll find out next time!

[Banjzooie]

I think this, like Journey Quest, needs to be stickied and locked until Summer when everyone has time to post.