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#1
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these are things.
You know what's something I really don't care for at all? The letter W. It just never sat well with me. Actually, the lower-case w is all right. Good letter, sits there quietly and behaves itself, plays well with the rest of the alphabetical society. No problem there. But W! Such an ugly, pretentious letter! Look at its points, sticking out there at crooked, unseemly angles! Sitting there like it owns the place, like it can afford to slack off and let its lines droop off to the left and right while all the other letters achieve some kind of aesthetic symmetry. I think it's time, my friends, to declare war on the letter W. It's not right for us to let it sit there, contaminating an otherwise perfectly good alphabet with its filthy presence. Or else we could replace it. I think we ought to come up with a new and improved design for a capital letter W. One that doesn't make me want to put a bullet through my head. Goddamned W! Go to hell.
You know what else? I always think of any period of time from the fifties and back as existing in black and white. Does anyone else do that? I guess it's because most movies and pictures older than the sixties were taken in black and white, and now, in my mind, the world did not go to color until at least 1960. I never met my grandfather; my entire knowledge of his appearance comes from looking at old photos of him. And to this day I can't help but to think of him as a black-and-white person. Straight out of Pleasantville, a monochromatic individual in an otherwise colorful world. I have the same problem with movie stars like Charlie Chaplin, Humphrey Bogart, John Wayne, and their ilk. My entire image of them is of denizens of a black-and-white world. In fact, as far as I care, there was no color in the world whatsoever until they made The Wizard of Oz. But I'd better stop talking abou this. I can't spell "Wizard" without one of those f***ing W's! This is putting me in a bad mood. Let's change the subject. I see a lot of ads on television that want you to donate money to support research for a specific disease. Cancer and diabetes are usually the most common. I don't mean to imply that patients with these diseases don't need the help and support, but you know who I feel genuinely sorry for? You know what group I would sincerely like to donate some money to help? Insomniac dyslexic agnostics. Poor people. They stay up all night wondering if there is a dog. Please, find it in your heart to donate. I know I have.
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I'm blogging again. Behold: the Top 10 Donkey Kong Country Stages, Part I! |
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#2
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Taking up three times as many syllables than any other letter... where's your so-called social justice now, when even the alphabet is contaminated by the bourgeoisie?
__________________
Boggy: You drop your change on the ground. An extremely gay man walks up to you and smells you extremely close to your face. He then gives you the dropped change and walks away, leaving you traumatized. |
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#3
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I even hate saying the word Double-You. It drives me nuts! As Boggy so kindly pointed out, the stupid thing gets more syllables than everyone else? Heck, that's why I refer to it as a word, rather than a letter. It's ridiculous! I'm tired of its tom-foolery, and feel that we should do something to stop it.
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#4
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But the W has strong allies, like Triple X and AA batteries. We surley can't win!
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#5
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God I love these forums.
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#6
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tl;dr
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#7
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Quote:
The oppression is ridiculous, and frankly I feel like there is more that we, as a people, could be doing.
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#8
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Your're right, but....the alphabet population is at a fragile 26. We can't lose anymorer, or there is a danger of extinction!
Would YOU like it if the last letter in the whole alphabet was R? You could only type in Rs. The whole keyboard would be one giant R and a spacebar. Of course, if we could get help from the numbers.....there's like, a whole bunch of them! |
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#9
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I know! W is an atrocity, indeed. Imagine how much time you could save in a lifetime by not having to say "double-you" so much! Sheesh. We need to come up with a plan to stop W in his tracks!
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Member since March 5, 2002PK PEPSISTOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRM! |
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#10
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It's a freaking poseur. It's a double-v and it KNOWS it.
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#11
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That's it. From now on, all of us don't use the letter "w"
Once you read this post, you are restricted from using it. |
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#12
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why is it called Double-You anyways?? It should actually be called Double-V. That god forsaken Double-You is just full of tricks and schemes. I think it's time we terminated him.
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#13
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You know what fills me with bitterness and insecurity? whenever there's someone next to me who won't stop sneezing. Like, one after another after another, and I'm not entirely sure if I should say "bless you" after the first one and just ignore the rest, or if I should wait until I'm absolutely sure they are finished and then say "bless you" but risk appearing rude and inattentive during the first round of sneezing. Most people seem to want me to bless them after every single sneeze. They give you that watery-eyed grimace. Sometimes they'll even have the cheek to say "thank you" even though you haven't blessed them yet! I hate those people. Anyone who thanks me when I have given out to blessing just doesn't deserve to get blessings to begin with. I write their name down in a personal notebook of mine to remember never to say "bless you" to them again. I mean, what am I, their personal blessing machine? what, do they just hang around me so I can provide them with instant blessings whenever they evacuate their olfactory tracts? well, forget them. Find yourself another slave, Sneezy!
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I'm blogging again. Behold: the Top 10 Donkey Kong Country Stages, Part I! |
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#14
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Quote:
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#15
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Oh, god.....your right. It's infiltrated using! We shall put protest signs in our sigs, asking for the site to be renamed, "Rare Warlock Project"!
....Damnit! "Rare Wizard Project!" Damn again! |
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