The RWP

Tanjo · #1 29th August 2008, 11:36 AM

I can't believe it. I've finally seen Postal. It blew me away. Words cannot describe the greatness of this film. Oh wait, yes they can, I wrote a review on facebook.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Facebook review

Postal rocked my ****ing socks.

Postal is probably one of the greatest movies ever made. I know what you're thinking, "How could Uwe Boll pull that off?". Well, Boll isn't the absolute bottom of the barrel (I'm looking at you Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer) and don't forget that he decided to take a different route in creating a comedy movie. It worked. Oh, and for you ladies out there you get to see Dave Foley naked.

I had fun from the very beginning. If you've played Postal 2 you'll instantly recognize the setting, the characters, and the humor. Uwe Boll himself makes a cameo Appearance of himself in his new "Little Auschwitz" theme park. His fate is bound to entertain even his biggest haters, and his last line is priceless.

The movie's plot is somewhat that of Postal 2. The Postal Dude, jobless and living in a trailerpark with his XXXL wife finally snaps one day, and, in need of some cash, comes up with a scheme with his Uncle Dave, the leader of a cult comprised of hot women, to steal a shipment of Krotchy dolls: testicle-shaped talking dolls (voiced by Verne Troyer) that are in incredibly high-demand and sell them on ebay for $4000 each. However, they're not the only ones who want to get their hands on the shipment of Krotchy dolls, the Taliban has a darker scheme involving spreading the Avian Flu to the children of America. Did I mention Osama Bin Laden is played by the Soup Nazi?

The movie follows Uncle Dave and The Postal Dude on their journey to steal the Krotchy dolls and make a fortune, but the unexpected turn of events and one of the best endings to any movie, ever, make Postal one of the best films of the fall...winter...summer...this year. Unfortunately for the eager public, due to the film's politically...incorrect content (Involving 9/11, children getting shot, most of the cast dressing up like hitler and animal abuse) the movie was shown in about 20 theatres instead of 1500 and only made 142 761 dollars (it cost 18 million to make). It's okay, Uwe Boll's movies are financed with Nazi gold, he confirms it in the movie. I strongly urge anyone reading this to actually go out and buy the DVD, which came out on tuesday, seeing as it comes with the full Postal 2 game which can help you appreciate the Movie. Or at least torrent the game too if you're torrenting the movie.

Alot of people can't accept the fact that Uwe Boll got it right with Postal. On its IMDB page, it has a score of 3.7. But it's not that hard to downvote a movie you haven't seen, especially if it's made by a director that has a less-than-positive reputation. I'll admit, Alone in the Dark literally pissed me off when I watched it, it was that bad. But read the user comments for Postal: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0486640/usercomments they're mostly positive.

I give it 9/10. This is amazing movie, it deserves an oscar, it goes beyond the description of "taking it too far", and it has something to offend the whole family.

Grey, you stike me as the type of person that would like this.

xxjoesusxx · #2 29th August 2008, 01:54 PM

sorry, but i doubt it.

Tanjo · #3 29th August 2008, 02:12 PM

That doesn't change the greatness of the movie.

xxjoesusxx · #4 29th August 2008, 02:13 PM

i'm sure you enjoyed it, but i refuse to believe this lies anywhere on the list of best movies ever made.

im too scared to watch it, I've lost enough brain cells listening to uwe boll talk in press releases.

EDIT: to the guy in the review, offensive doesnt automatically = win. Offensive for the sake of offensive ? That = retarded.

Tanjo · #5 29th August 2008, 02:16 PM

Clearly you've watched far too many Boll press-releases.

Grey Jinjo · #6 29th August 2008, 02:34 PM

I may, but I never played Postal which would obviously hinder a lot of the in-jokes and scenery.

Tanjo · #7 29th August 2008, 02:47 PM

Well actually the movie's based on Postal 2. You can play the free trial and get alot of the references and in-jokes. Postal 2 basically makes GTA look like Barbie's horse princess adventure, and is a must-play for anyone.

TheNinthDoctor · #8 29th August 2008, 05:33 PM

I have no problem with most "offensive" parodies, but nothing in your review struck me as the least bit funny. Not even the nazi gold financing Boll. I don't hate the man, he's just annoying.

Oh look, it's Osama Bin Ladin! Get it? Do you get it? And krotchy dolls! They are shaped like genitalia! Do you get it? It's offensive so it's automatically funny.