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Old 5th January 2012, 03:28 AM
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Masked Hero Masked Hero is offline
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Okay, here is my unfinished Kinect Sports fanfic. I will probably finish writing it whenever, but now I am too lazy to type. So yeah, when you read it, keep in mind it is a WIP. Also I was rushed and I know nothing about Kinect Sports or grammar.

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It was the first day of the new Kinect Sports tournament, where athletes and soccer moms from around the world gathered around to play all their favorite sports together as a large extended family. The games were supposed to be incredibly amazing this year, for an eccentric trillionaire named Penny Pounds was hosting them. People had to fly to her own private country, which strangely wasn’t on any map.

“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the latest Kinect Sports Season! I’m your host with the most, Gary Gardener! With me today to announce all the obvious going-ons in the game is former Kinects champion Jerry Jordan. How are you doing on this marvelous day, Jerry?”

“Not so well, Gary. I’m feeling rather depressed. How many hungry children could the money that was used for this game feed? Instead society wastes all of its resources on entertainment. It churns my stomach Gary.” Jerry said solemnly.

“Hahaha, as always you never quit with the jokes, do you Jerry? Oh boy, it looks like Ms. Pounds is about to start the annual preliminary speech! I love these monologues of merriment.” Gary said optimistically.

Penny stood in the middle of the field with a microphone. She was dressed in an odd yellow tracksuit that reminded people of a certain Bride. Her hair was as red as freshly spilt blood and her eyes were equally crimson.

“Dear peasants” she said coldly “I, Penny Pounds, have told you all that you were here for a mere Kinect Sports tournament. I have lied to you. Instead I, Penny Pounds, have brought you all here for a chance for glory! Our noble contestants will march into my dome and fight to the death! Yes! Welcome to Kinect Blood Sports!”

She then proceeded to cackle maniacally, like a cross between a Hyena and that clown that touched your 9 year old sister at your 7th birthday party. Eventually she calmed down and began to speak again

“Now I assume that some, maybe even the majority, of you filthy peasants may not wish to participate in these games. All of those who wish to leave can do so.”

The crowd collectively sighed in relief.

“In a coffin.” Penny finished.

The crowd collectively freaked the **** out.

“Wow, what a crazy turn for the worst, huh Jerry? I’m willing to keep on commentating as the killing commences though, how about you?” said Gary

“Sure, I guess. I don’t have anything to do since it is Wednesday. All the good TV is on Tuesday.” Jerry said.

And so, the entire audience was forced to become contestants in Kinect Blood Sports. This particular story will focus on one soccer mom named Sophie Spooner. She was 36, brown haired, happily married, mother of 2 girls and one boy, and a lover of all things digital. She had entered the Kinect Sports tournament because she loved videogames.
She had played them since she was a little girl.

“Oh golly, whatever shall I do? I can’t kill people! But if I don’t, who will take Little Sally to her soccer games? Or Sammy to his ballet lessons? Or Little Sally #2 to her boxing lessons? I can’t count on my lay about husband. He can’t even take the dishes out or water the garbage! I need to escape pronto!”

As Penny Pounds guards took the prisoners to their cells. They would stay there until it was time for them to fight one another. Sally was stuck in there alone for what seemed to be weeks. One by one, she saw the neighboring prisoners forcibly dragged out of their cells and sent to the Deadly Dome, as it became to be called. Eventually, it was her turn. She was dragged by two guards and thrown into a room. It was pure white, with only a weapons rack. From out of nowhere, Penny Pounds voice appeared.
“Please select a weapon and then stand on the start pad. Your objective this time is to reach the end of the level and then kill the boss.”

Sophie looked at the weapons rack again. There was a whole bunch of guns, swords, chainsaws, and even the flipper lever thing that is on mailboxes. Eventually she decided to pick a giant spoon. With that done, she stood on the platform and was instantly warped out of the room. She found herself in the Deadly Dome. The grass was a vibrant green beneath her feet and the wind was blowing towards the east, where a large goalpost was. She noticed a large sign in the goalpost that read “goal”.

“How fitting for something that was once an innocent sports competition.” She thought to herself when she suddenly heard something.

“Welcome folks once again to Kinect Blood Sports! I’m still your host Gary and with me is my good pal, Jerry. We’re still here announcing and as long as we continue to do so, Ms. Pounds won’t horribly massacre us! What a nice lady!”

“Whatever Gary, just introduce the latest victim. I’m surprised they still have people living to quote play unquote. None of them has even made it past the first boss."
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